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The Cuteness That Came To AsgarthA H.P.Lushcraft story, transcribed and re-typedby Simon Barber, 1995.WARNING. This story contains scenes of explicit andgratuitous Cuteness. Specific Life Insurance cover shouldbe arranged before reading.It is one of the few saving graces in that tiny portion of allpossibilities that we call Life, that so few people bother to sit andtruly think, about the world around them. Though poets today may complainof the lack of Vision, and scientists worry about the dearth of trueinspiration, perhaps it is better so. The difficulty is, you see, thatonce you begin to put the pieces of the jigsaw together, you can neverreally stop, whether you like the emerging picture or not .....But I must start from the beginning. I was in my second year at theancient University of Asgarth, in the high market town that nestles onthe Northern moors. The town lay in a great scooping bowl bitten out ofthe hillside, like a six-mile crater in a landscape half eaten by thecold waves of the North Sea. Very old and grand were the buildingsthere, and often in Winter you could look out over the ocean fogs lyingheavy below like a great white blanket for the grey waters beneath.It was on such a day, that I met her. To make my meagre grant coverexpenses, I had taken a part-time job using my degree subject, as aQuantum Mechanic. In my Virtual Helmet, I was viewing the underside of ahalf-fried chip that someone had picked up while their fur was freshlybrushed and charged with static .... shaking my head, I began to pack upthe (extremely small) toolkit. This was a replacement job, not a repair."Hidy !" There was a voice in the shop. I scooted out on theVirtual; trolley, and pulled off the nanoscale helmet. My ears prickedup higher than ever - I'm a canine, greyhoundish generally, but withsharply erect Jackal ears. Mother once spent a holiday in the NamelessCity in the Sahara, but that's another story.The visitor was shortish, just over a metre high, and of definitelepine stock. Over-long, floppy ears waved cheerfully, her golden-blondefur mostly hidden by the heavy-looking metallic suit she wore. Istraightened up, and wiped my hands clean. Second customer of the day, Itold myself - and far the nicest."Can I help you ?" I asked her.For a second, She turned a flashing glance on me. It felt - much as Iimagine a modern aircraft's computer feels, when a radar scans it. I gotthe feeling that she was analysing me minutely, from the bones outward.But then she smiled, and the feeling evaporated."I'm 'aving some trouble weeth my left paw," she said shyly,extending a chubby arm. I looked down, and saw what she meant - it wasnot designer armour she wore, but a powered suit, the left wrist ofwhich was held stiffly. I ran through the possibilities, and decided tocheck out the servo-motor controller circuits."Staying her long, ma'am ?" I asked her as I gently popped theelectronics package and slid it into the analyser.She nodded, her huge ears bobbing. "I am - you say, just arriving'ere. I 'ave started at the Universitee this week." She flashed meanother of those glances, and a pink tongue ran over brilliantly whitechisel-teeth, sparkling as if they were brand new. "Ze suit, I need itto be - in shape. I am glad to find you open, eet is a new town for me."Unbelievably long whiskers twitched.
 
In a few seconds the analyser reported what I had expected: amicron-sized break across half a dozen transistors in one of the powerchips. Setting the quantum drills going to dig a new electron tunnel, Iturned to her. She intrigued me. That accent was almost French, but likethe rest of her, there was something - definitely Different, about her."It's going to take half an hour to fix," I told her, notforgetting to add fifty percent for labour. Then I glanced up at theclock. "If you're new in town - would you like help with Lunch ? I knowa great place just round the corner"Her ears pricked up markedly. From what I could see of her, she wasbuilt on the rounded side, yet seemed light, as if from a forced diet.Her huge eyes twinkled at me."Thank you ! I'd just LOVE to. I 'ave always ze - appetite."I pulled on my jacket and shut up shop, my heart pounding. Thispromised to be interesting: Asgarth is a small place, and at theUniversity we all see a lot of each other.Gods, if only I had known !"I thought rabbits were vegetarians," I commented in surprise as weordered lunch. Fish and chips for me, as usual. But she had asked forprime steak, cooked so rare, "if eet kisses ze pan twice, I will bejealous."She looked at me from under those unbelievably long lashes. "Ah. Iam not all I seem." Again, that half-mocking stare. Then, while we ateand the red blood ran down her stubby muzzle from the half-raw andbleeding meat, she told me her tale.Her parents had been French - or more accurately, she had been bornin North-West France, her father being from somewhat further afield. Hereyes had twinkled when she told me her birthday; I happened to know thelepine gestation period, and counted back to Midsummer Evening. Nothingunusual, and it explained a lot about her odd shape, with the myriadpossible genetic combinations in that sort of mixed marriage."You ought to meet my room-mate," I said jokingly. "He might be arelative of yours - on your father's side, that is. "Her eyes flashed in alarm. Ears went half rigid, and then strainedto flatten as she forced them down."We 'ad, ze family quarrel," she said hurriedly. "But, my family'ome, it was too near the border - when they came over from Belgique .."she shuddered.My own tail drooped in sympathy. Just after the Millenium, the EChad tightened its grip, welding Europe into one massive slave-stateruled from the beaurocrat-complex dug deep beneath Brussels, itsflooding problem and national unemployment solved by toiling bucket-gangs labouring millions-strong day and night. Folk had wondered howthey had forced the Accelerated Unification Directive through: almosttoo late, the world had found out. Pacts had been made with Others fromfar beyond the friendly voids off Formahault and Algol that we knew sowell - pacts to rewrite the Regulations concerning Time and Spacecompletely.And they had been stopped just in time - I remembered as we alldid, the Night of The War, when the skies had lit up around the Westernhemisphere. Fortunately, only a few old fission bombs had been used, andwhen they had proven useless, the anti-iron hollow charge warheads hadworked against what clawed up from the Brussels crater. Everything theyhad scored direct hits against had died, whether the main plush or theside-seams were penetrated.She shrugged, and tapped her armour. "I was wounded, in ze war. My
 
people say, I may recover - but I will need this for a time, until I'ave back what I lost. " Huge eyes fixed me with a half-bashful stare."I am told, I must pay attention to what I eat - and I was a long timein 'ealing. I 'ave to make sure I 'ave - company."We finished our meal, and returned to the workshop. Reluctantly Ifitted the repaired wrist servo to her suit and watched her cheerfullywave goodbye with it. As I watched her metal-shielded rump bobbing upthe steep stone streets towards the campus, my head swam with strangethoughts."My, she's pretty," Came a voice from behind me. I wheeled, and sawthe grinning snout of Aelfric, the third-year otter who dropped in fromtime to time to have the custom chips on his Artificial Omniscienceprojects tweaked. "I've seen her up at the Uni - new student, you think?"I nodded, and became aware that my tongue was hanging out. "She'sstudying biology, she says - she's really something."Aelfric watched with me as she disappeared from view. "Like hertaste in clothing," he murmured. Then his whiskers went rigid. "Now,where could she have had THAT built, I wonder ?" He mused to himself."I've seen that design before." He flashed me an amused glance. "Youwon't find it in "Jane's All The World's Fighting Mecha", though. I'vea few publications you might like to read - if you want to havesomething more to talk about with her."That Saturday, I closed up shop and went out to stretch my legsbefore returning to an evening of hard studying. But as I hikedvigourously up the steep slopes of the Pendenmas Peak, my mind was in aturmoil. I thought of nothing but Fuzzelle, and the way she moved evenin her powered armour - and even the technical side of me appreciatedwhat an excellent piece of machinery that was, fitting so well, andmoving almost silently without the usual click and hiss of the servos.Her family must have been unusually rich, I thought fleetingly, to havea suit like that made for her.Yet something Aelfric had said, came back to me. I had seen medicalsuits before, giving full mobility to folk who would otherwise beirretrievably immobile. Those were discreet exoskeletons built of joint-cuffs linked by slim alloy tubes, that could be worn under fairlyconventional clothing, save for the backpack power source. Fuzzelle didindeed wear something like the full armour suits in the fighting mechadigests. I found my thoughts dwelling on what she looked like inside it.I thought of her honey-gold fur, of the enormous length of her silkylop-ears, of her tail - yes, even her tail had a separate rounded bulgebuilt into her armour.Shaking my head as if to clear it, I turned back towards town. Onemore distraction in my busy schedule, I could do without.Night was falling as I looked down the hallway of the splendidlyNeo-Neo Gothic mansion where I stayed. It was an authentic 16th Centuryfortified manor, built on the ruins of an earlier 20th Century shoppingmall. As I cautiously advanced towards my room, the feeling that I wasnot alone grew ever stronger.I stopped - grasped the handle and jerked the door open, leapingback instantly. IT was there ! Falling from the beamed ceiling to thespot where I would have incautiously been standing, a great tarry massof writhing liquescence splattered like a dropped skip full of midnight
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