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Moose Jaw is cold as a well digger’s ass. The old style heat radiator in my roomis clanging away but it’s still freezing in here. It’s gonna take a monumentaleffort just to get out of bed and get dressed, much less walk two miles to theagency to see if any work comes in.I’ve been on the run now for almost twenty years. Looking behind my back when Iwalk down the street, living in cheap hotels, working for temporary job servicesfor peanuts. My family hasn’t heard from me the whole time, it would too risky ifthey knew were I was. Twenty years ago I was in the navy. Stationed in Hawaii.Young and dumb. Thought it was cool to deal some smoke on the side for a littleextra cash. It didn’t turn out cool when we got busted. We were looking on doingtime in the brig. Not much, maybe a couple of months. But I panicked and bolted.Couldn’t stand the thought of being locked up in a cage. Now look where I am. ***For close to two years after I took off I had lived in Los Angeles on the topfloor of this old warehouse. Just a mattress on the floor. The guy who I workedfor owned it. It sat behind this huge night club called “The Slippery T*t” whichhe also owned.Gus was the name of my boss and he was quite the entrepreneur. Beside the bar, heran a pro wrestling and roller derby school, and shot low budget porno movies inthe warehouse. He also was a part owner of several porno and peep show shops inthe county. I was a bouncer/bar tender at the bar, assistant wrestling coach (Ilet guys pick me and body slam me or hit me in the head with a folding chair), andlight and camera man for the porno movies. On occasion, several other bouncers andmyself earned extra dough by strong arming people who owed Gus money.The Black Dahlia case seemed to have had a lasting impression on my employer. Doyou remember that murder? Way back in the late 40s the cops found this chick cutin half on a vacant lot. No blood or anything. Real fucking creepy. Lots of moviesand books were done about it.That shit happens practically on a weekly basis in Los Angeles, so I have no ideawhy so many people are obsessed over a murder that happened in the 1940’s. Butthat’s L. A.Anyway, Gus had his office just decorated from floor to ceiling with photos ofthis broad, bookcases full of books about her,and he even owned a couple ofvintage porno movies that she had starred in. Mostly lesbian crap. Half of Gus’sfilms that he made always had an “actress” dressed up just like Elizabeth Short.That was the dead broad’s name.Thing about it is, I have a hunch that Gus was involved in it. When I was in L.A.,Gus must have been in his mid 70s, the murder was in the late 40’s. He would havebeen about the right age. He had a real weird buddy, Wally, that was into thischick, too. Those two were always talking about her and trading shit about thecase. Some local news reporter thought that Wally had been the one who did it andWally loved that. I heard the old loon died in a flophouse fire not too long ago.
 
Drunk and smoking in bed.I had got the job after a week or so of bumming around L. A. I looked up an oldgal that I knew in the navy. She was making ends meet by working for a dentistduring the day and exotic dancing at night. She had also given up men and wasliving with a female biker who looked like Sonny Liston, who made me feel veryunwelcome. Strippers tend to make the sex industry circuit in L. A. and she turnedme on to working with Gus. Said that for being a complete slime ball he wasn’t badto work for. That was a good enough reference for me.I bought a book on how to change your identity out of this catalog from this weirdcompany called Loompanics, LTD up in Washington state. It had all sorts of crazybooks in it like “How To Make Meth Amphetamine For Fun And Profit” and “How ToKill People And Then Fake Your Own Death.” Sounds goofy but it sure helped out inmy situation. I wound up with a California drivers license, birth certificate,Social Security card, and a passport.Appearance wise, I just shaved my head, got my ear pierced and wore a big hoop earring, and grew a goatee. I had access to a gym since I worked and lived in awrestling school, so I started to pump iron and do steroids. Within the year I hadput on roughly forty pounds of muscle. I didn’t bear the slightest resemblance tothe boney little dude who had left Albert Lea, Minnesota to join the navy so (whatseemed like) many years agoGus’s porno business didn’t attract what you would call real quality adult filmstars. He dealt mainly with heroin addicts who needed some fix money, midwestrunaways, a midget husband and wife team, couple of the roller derby clique, andevery great once in a while an old burned out formerly famous “star” would stop into make a quick buck. That’s where my path would cross with Jon.Jon had once been a hugely successful porn star. He had zero looks, a scrawnydrugged out looking frame, and couldn’t act even by adult movies standards. But hehad an enormous tool. The guy had made thousands of short adult “loops” but hadpissed it all away on booze and crack cocaine. Rumor had it (Jon liked to keepthis one spreading) that a very famous singer and actress had once paid Jon bigbucks to snort a line of coke off his giant root.He was no longer welcome on any of the mainstream adult sets due to his erraticbehavior, inability to get hard on demand, and known ties to the flourishing crackindustry. But on occasion for pin money he would make a gay flick or play theheavy in a hard core S & M movie.Gus signed him on to mainly make appearances at his club, autograph video boxes atdirty book stores, and attempt to make a movie with him once in a while if hecould get it halfway up.I don’t know how many nights we all stood around setting up the lights and cameraswhile Jon would be laying on a bed on the set with two young ladies straight offthe farm in Wisconsin, who would be giving it the old college try and attempt to
 
get Jon’s massive stinger to get up and go. Nine out ten times, Gus would freakout and start ranting and raving about all the money that was being wasted on thisquality feature and it inevitably would turn into basically a lesbian shot withJon just kind of rolling around in the middle and getting in the way.Once Gus tried to make a porno related Black Dahlia murder film with Jon in therole of the murderer. Jon had been out partying the night before and was horriblyhungover. He couldn’t get it up as usual, but what really pissed Gus off was thegrand finale. Since we didn’t have any real bodies to cut up like the realmurderer had, we had to settle for a store mannequin. It took every bit ofstrength that Jon had to saw half way through the plastic and then he ruined thewhole shot by barfing all over the dummy.But people recognized him like he was an academy award winner. He came along withus one night to the fights at the Olympic Auditorium, which is a sleazier jointthan some of the places Jon made his films in, and we practically had to fightpeople off of the guy. Both men and women were all over him. Wanting his autographand maybe a shot at his massive johnson.He wasn’t all bad though. When one of the bouncers got married, Jon managed torecruit some of the old female stars from his heyday to the bachelor party. It washeld at an incredibly filthy adult motel on Sunset Strip. Jumping Jesus, what anight! A punch was made in a fifty gallon garbage can (clean) with cold duckchampagne, beer, and a hundred hits of quality speed. The night clerk came down tocomplain about the noise at four in the morning and wound up screwing the pornstar he had once fantasized about as a teenager. It was all great fun.I was working the door one night at the club when Jon came out to catch some freshair. Gus had booked a private female stag party and Jon was the main attraction.He had lost a lot of weight from all the crack and he looked bizarre as well asidiotic up on the stage. Shaking his money maker in this g-string that didn’t comeclose to covering up his once great python of love.Gus had been concerned that he wouldn’t show up. Jon had been acting real nervouslately and a week or so ago had shown up with a black eye and a nasty looking gashon his chin.“Got a proposition for you, my man.” Jon always tried to talk like a high rollingpimp. Kind of hissing out the words.“And what would that be Jon?” Looking out of the corner of my eye at the LosAngeles Laker shorts that he was wearing. No shirt or shoes. Just these shortsthat must have been two sizes too big for him. He looked like Bill Walton with aneating disorder.“I got these assholes up in the hills that owe me some serious jack for some rockthat I fronted them. Not a thing really. Their a couple of little dipshits.Shouldn’t be problem for a man of your stature.” As he grinned at me I cringed.His teeth looked like little baked beans and the breath coming out of his maw
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