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Beauty Tips for the Dead
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Beauty Tips for the Dead
Unavailable
Beauty Tips for the Dead
Ebook446 pages6 hours

Beauty Tips for the Dead

Rating: 3.5 out of 5 stars

3.5/5

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Currently unavailable

Currently unavailable

About this ebook

"Beauty Tips for the Dead" is about two young guys, David and Jonathan, who are marketing executives in an advertizing company. They want badly to become product placement specialists. Before work, after work, at lunch, and during coffee breaks they develop multiple uncensored marketing plans that display their creative talents. They believe these schemes will inevitably bring them fame and riches beyond comprehension. But they never actually get the chance to implement their ideas. Then, David gets fired. With time on his hands he develops a master plan for a grand festival – a marketer's dream. He searches for the catalyst, the trigger that will blow this little weekend outing into an earth shaking event. The festival combines two historical events which, frankly, should never be joined.
"Beauty Tips" is equally about Mary and Jane, two young professional women: one is a nurse and the other is a writer/musician/mortician's assistant. They are both quirky - one is almost a saint and the other is a bit dark. As children they were as close as sisters, but a confounding event sent them in dramatically different directions. Years later, when they each become disillusioned with their jobs and lives, they both decide to make a new start. Bringing an assortment of life's baggage with them, they meet again in grad school. Just when they get started with their new life plans, they meet David and get caught up in his precarious plan.
"Beauty Tips" is about friendship and betrayal and curveballs. Life is unpredictable. The book is about choices and how one's very worst moment may lead to the very best consequences - or not. When life gives you lemons, you can make lemonade; or you can slice it, squeeze it, and squirt the juice back in life's eye.
LanguageEnglish
PublisherBookBaby
Release dateMay 12, 2011
ISBN9780983246718
Unavailable
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Reviews for Beauty Tips for the Dead

Rating: 3.375 out of 5 stars
3.5/5

8 ratings4 reviews

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  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    I found this book to be quite charming and (as someone else put it) 'quirky'. It was easy to read, and quite entertaining. I enjoyed the humor in the book, and chuckled out loud a few times!
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Review: Just when I thought I had read it all, I came upon Beauty Tips for the Dead by Gerald Medenwald, a strangely quirky, fast-paced, and remarkably random read. The first couple of chapters were plain weird, but once I got into the whole of the novel... they just got weirder. There were so many characters to keep track of, and some of them came out of nowhere, their idiosyncrasies ranging from slapstick to serious. The same was true for the dialogue, most of the humor snuck up on me, but some of the dialogue seemed completely bizarre, making me question whether or not there was a point at all. This does not mean that the characters and dialogue were not well-developed, just unconventional and sometimes unrealistic. Fortunately, the overall plot-line manged to tie all of the odd-ends together into a pretty hilarious genre-salad. My favorite characters were Mary and Jane, their opposite personalities were quite interesting, adding some much needed background the the story. This was definitely a unique and fun read, even the most tense moments were laughable. I will definitely read future books by this author! Recommended to adult readers of the amusingly unorthodox.Rating: Bounty's Out (3.5/5)*I received this book from the author in exchange for an honest and unbiased review.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    A strange book. A bit hard to follow. It jumps around between four different characters and then introduces a few more for some reason and then does very little with those ones. The main characters are Jane and Mary and David and Jonathan. The men have known each other since childhood as have the women. The men worked for a marketing company and are good at finding different ways to sell things. David leaves the company and ends up working in a psychiatric facility. Jonathan and David come up with an idea for a "Jesus" festival and David takes advantage of a new patient who seems to think he's Jesus and gets him released so he can appear at the festival. Meanwhile, Mary has become a nurse. Jane was from a family of undertakers and had written a book called Beauty Tips for the Dead which was meant to be a handbook for undertakers but has turned into a best seller. And that's all we hear of that for the rest of the book. Jane works in a bar and moves in with Mary who's ultra conservative, as opposite as possible from Jane. They get involved in David and Jonathan's scheme well past the middle of the book. The book seemed to be a bit all over the place and i sometimes found it difficult to keep up. I suppose it was meant to be funny and a farce and some of it was, definitely. It wasn't bad but it was a bit off the wall.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This is certainly a funny and weird book. This slice-of-life story centers around David, Jonathan, Jane, and Mary and their search to find...something. We're never sure what they're looking for but the sense that the characters are longing for something is clear. Somehow, this leads to David kidnapping someone who "looks like Jesus". Trust me, it makes more sense when you read it. Seriously, this book is hard to summarize since it's a little bit of everything!Now when I said this book is weird, I meant it! The characters are very quirky but complex. Jane is a bored but talented woman who does a lot of odd jobs, Mary is nuts about her religion and is a nurse at a hospital, and David and Jonathan are creative entrepreneurs who randomly come up with the weirdest but most brilliant ideas. The book engaging and fast-paced and the humor is underlying every other sentence. While the characters are quirky (or maybe because of it), I didn't feel that they are all that believable. Everyone is just too far off the scale! Because of the randomness, it's also very hard to follow along what the characters are saying sometimes. There's been far too many times where I had to reread a page to figure out what happened. Sometimes, the book would jump from A to B without showing how it got there. One example is when they're negotiating for an attorney. Turn to the next chapter, and the case is won. With no transition or anything. I was so sure that I missed a chapter or something!Pros: Quirky characters, engaging and fast-paced Cons: characters not believable, hard to follow along sometimesOverall, this book is definitely worth reading. It's unique in both the characters and the storytelling. The plot is very slapstick and haphazard. The kidnapping doesn't even happen until two-thirds of the book is done. However, there is a certain beauty to it. It's like the author wants to defy almost every literary convention out there. As a warning, however, there are curse words so I wouldn't recommend it for any young readers. Won in a giveaway in return for an honest review