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    My Life as a Computer Cockroach
    My Life as a Computer Cockroach
    My Life as a Computer Cockroach
    Ebook116 pages59 minutes

    My Life as a Computer Cockroach

    By Bill Myers

    4.5/5

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    About this ebook

    FINALLY, THE TRUTH ABOUT THE MILLENNIUM BUG!

    Through a bizarre disaster (nothing unusual for our boy blunder), Wally accidentally fries the circuits of Ol' Betsy, his laptop computer.

    Suddenly, whatever he types turns into reality. . . Including Wally becoming the city's Chief of Police, and finally the Governor of the state. It's 11:59, New Year's Eve, when our hero tries retyping the truth into his computer - a commendable effort which, unfortunately, manages to short out every computer in the world! By midnight, the entire universe has credited Wally's mishap to the MILLENNIUM BUG! Panic, chaos and hilarity start the new century, thanks to our beloved Wally.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherThomas Nelson
    Release dateOct 3, 1999
    ISBN9781418535070
    My Life as a Computer Cockroach
    Author

    Bill Myers

    Bill Myers (www.Billmyers.com) is a bestselling author and award-winning writer/director whose work has won sixty national and international awards. His books and videos have sold eight million copies and include The Seeing, Eli, The Voice, My Life as, Forbidden Doors, and McGee and Me.

    Read more from Bill Myers

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      Book preview

      My Life as a Computer Cockroach - Bill Myers

      MY LIFE

      as a

      Computer

      COCKROACH

      Tommy Nelson® Books by Bill Myers

      The Incredible Worlds of Wally McDoogle

      —My Life As a Smashed Burrito with Extra Hot Sauce

      —My Life As Alien Monster Bait

      —My Life As a Broken Bungee Cord

      —My Life As Crocodile Junk Food

      —My Life As Dinosaur Dental Floss

      —My Life As a Torpedo Test Target

      —My Life As a Human Hockey Puck

      —My Life As an Afterthought Astronaut

      —My Life As Reindeer Road Kill

      —My Life As a Toasted Time Traveler

      —My Life As Polluted Pond Scum

      —My Life As a Bigfoot Breath Mint

      —My Life As a Blundering Ballerina

      —My Life As a Screaming Skydiver

      —My Life As a Human Hairball

      —My Life As a Walrus Whoopee Cushion

      —My Life As a Computer Cockroach (Mixed-Up Millennium Bug)

      —My Life As a Beat-Up Basketball Backboard

      —My Life As a Cowboy Cowpie

      —My Life As Invisible Intestines with Intense Indigestion

      —My Life As a Skysurfing Skateboarder

      —My Life As a Tarantula Toe Tickler

      Baseball for Breakfast (picture book)

      SECRET AGENT DINGLEDORF

      . . . and his trusty dog, SPLAT 1

      The Case of the Giggling Geeks

      The Case of the Chewable Worms

      The Case of the Flying Toenails

      The Case of the Drooling Dinosaurs

      The Case of the Hiccupping Ears

      Other Books by Bill Myers

      McGee and Me! (series)

      Bloodhound, Inc. (series)

      Forbidden Doors (series)

      The Bloodstone Chronicles (fantasy)

      the incredible worlds of Wally McDoogle

      MY LIFE

      as a

      Computer

      COCKROACH

      (Formerly titled My Life As a Mixed-Up Millennium Bug)

      BILL MYERS

      3

      MY LIFE AS A COMPUTER COCKROACH

      (formerly published under the title My Life As a Mixed-Up Millennium Bug)

      © 1999 by Bill Myers

      All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced in any form without the written permission of the publisher, except for brief excerpts in reviews.

      Published in Nashville, Tennessee, by Tommy Nelson®. Tommy Nelson is a trademark of Thomas Nelson, Inc.

      Unless otherwise indicated, Scripture quotations are from the International Children’s Bible®, New Century Version®, © 1983, 1986, 1988.

      Scripture quotations marked (NIV) are from the Holy Bible, New International Version. © 1973, 1978, 1984 International Bible Society.

      Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

      Myers, Bill, 1953–

         My life as a computer cockroach (formerly My life as a mixed-up millennium bug) / Bill Myers.

         p. cm. — (The incredible worlds of Wally McDoogle ; #17)

         Summary: When inept Wally McDoogle discovers that whatever he types on his computer turns into reality, what starts as just a little cheating soon escalates into a war.

         ISBN 978-0-8499-4026-2

      [1. Computers Fiction. 2. Cheating Fiction. 3. Humorous stories.] I. Title. II. Series: Myers, Bill, 1953– . Incredible worlds of Wally McDoogle ; #17.

      PZ7.M98234Mm 1999

      [Fic]—dc21

      99-35244

      CIPP

      Printed in the United States of America

      09 10 11 12 13 EPAC 17 16 15 14 13

      To Nancy Rue—

      Another friend committed to reaching youth

      The LORD detests lying lips, but he delights in men who are truthful.

      —Proverbs 12:22 (NIV)

      Contents

      1. Just for Starters . . .

      2. The Cheating Begins

      3. Bye-Bye, Kilroy

      4. Uh-Oh

      5. Uh-Oh x 2

      6. Faking It

      7. 11:59 and Counting . . .

      8. The United States of Wally

      9. This Means War!

      10. Wrapping Up

      Chapter 1

      Just for Starters . . .

      So what’s so wrong with a little cheating? You know, scribbling an answer or two on your wrist before the test, or embroidering them on the back of the shirt of the person sitting in front of you. Then, of course, there’s the ol’ standby of hiring a sky writer to scrawl the answers up there in the sky so as you gaze out the window you just happen to come up with all the right answers.

      So what’s the matter with that?

      Unfortunately, I found out the answer the hard way: PLENTY!

      Oh, sorry, didn’t mean to shout. I guess I just don’t want you to have to go through what I did. Not that you could; after all, there’s only one Wally The-Walking-Disaster McDoogle. But still . . .

      It all started with P.E., which, as everyone knows, stands for Physical Embarrassment. Once again Coach Kilroy (whose name could just as easily be Coach Kill-Wally) was on my case. All year he’d been threatening to flunk me. That’s why Mom and Dad suggested I take the special course he was offering over the winter break for extra credit. It sounded great, except for the part where I actually had to go to class.

      Come on, McDoogle! Stop being a wimp and climb that rope! You’re holding up the line! Climb the rope!

      It was all part of an elaborate obstacle course Coach had set up outside on the soccer field. To get you ready for the big computer crash, he shouted. When that Y2K bug hits and there’s rioting in the streets, you’ll thank your lucky stars that I made you tough enough to survive!

      That was Coach’s new mission in life . . . to help us survive some sort of big, worldwide computer crash. I appreciated the thought, but right now I just wanted to survive the last eighteen minutes of class.

      I’d been hanging on to that rope, trying to climb it, for just a little past forever. But with no success. (Unless you call my arms stretching a good foot and a half longer than they’re supposed to success.) It’s not that I’m a wimp—shoot, sometimes I work out for hours on end . . . if you call pushing all those buttons on the TV remote working out!

      Forget it, McDoogle! Coach finally shouted. Move on to the next station! Move it! Move it! Move it!

      Gratefully, I moved it and ran to the next station in the obstacle course . . . dragging my newly stretched arms on the ground behind me.

      Unfortunately, this station was no better. We were to run through eight tires and up to a giant wall with a fishing net and then climb it. Well, everyone else was running through

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