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    Lovers Jokes
    Lovers Jokes
    Lovers Jokes
    Ebook71 pages1 hour

    Lovers Jokes

    By James David

    4/5

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    About this ebook

    Laughter is as essential for us as breathing is. The life becomes a big boredom without humor. Whatever be the merits of today’s busy and hectic life, it certainly has taken away laughter from our lives. Mental breakdowns we see around are proofs of it.
    This ‘Jokes E-book’ of ours is an effort to dissolve your tensions in a solution of smiles, chuckles and laughter. We earnestly believe that our collections of hilarious jokes will displace your worries and gloom with lots of Ha-Ha’s.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherMahesh Dutt Sharma
    Release dateJan 14, 2014
    ISBN9781311593139
    Lovers Jokes
    Author

    James David

    A prestigious author and journalist. Written more than 250 books. A freelance writer and writing is his passion.

    Read more from James David

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      Book preview

      Lovers Jokes - James David

      Lovers Jokes

      By James David

      Published by Mahesh Dutt Sharma

      Smashwords Edition

      © mds e-books 2014

      Smashwords License Statement

      This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each reader. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

      Preface

      Laughter is as essential for us as breathing is. The life becomes a big boredom without humour. Whatever be the merits of today’s busy and hectic life, it certainly has taken away laughter from our lives. Mental breakdowns we see around are proofs of it.

      This ‘Jokes E-book’ of ours is an effort to dissolve your tensions in a solution of smiles, chuckles and laughter. We earnestly believe that our collections of hilarious jokes will displace your worries and gloom with lots of Ha-Ha’s.

      Table of Contents

      Chapter 1

      Chapter 2

      Chapter 3

      Chapter 4

      Chapter 5

      Chapter 1

      A man named Sumit went over to his friend’s house and rang the bell. His friend’s wife, Kumkum, answered the door.

      Hi, is Abhay home? he asked her.

      No, he went to the store.

      Well, you mind if I wait?

      No, come on in.

      They sat down and shortly Sumit said, You know, Kumkum, you have the greatest breasts I have ever seen. I’d give you a thousand rupees if I could see just one.

      Kumkum thought about this for a second, and thought about how badly they needed the money right now. She opened her robe and exposed one. Sumit promptly thanked her and put Rs. 1000 on the table.

      They sat there a while longer, and Sumit said, They are so beautiful! I’d love to see the both of them. I’ll give you another 1000 rupees if I could just see both of them together.

      Kumkum thought about this for a moment, then opened her robe and gave Sumit a nice big look. Kumkum thanked her and threw another Rs. 1000 on the table. Then he said he couldn’t wait any longer for Abhay and left.

      A while later, Abhay arrived and Kumkum said, You know, your weird friend Sumit came over while you were gone.

      Abhay turned and said, Good. Did he drop off the Rs. 2000 he owed me?

      *********

      A man is walking down the street and he sees a boy riding a wagon. The boy has his dog pulling it with a rope attached to the dog's balls. The man says You know if you tied it around his neck, it would go faster. The boy replies, I know but then I wouldn’t get the cool siren.

      *********

      A wife and husband on the plane when the husband turned to the wife and said, Let’s talk. I’ve heard that flights will go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.

      Wife, who had just opened her book, closed it slowly, and said to the husband, What would you like to discuss?

      Oh, I don’t know, said the husband. How about nuclear power?

      OK, said the wife. That could be an interesting topic. But let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat grass. The same stuff. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?"

      Jeez, said the husband. I have no idea.

      Well, then, said the wife, How is it that you feel qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don’t know shit?

      *********

      A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped centimetres from a shop window.

      For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said, Look mate, don’t ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!

      The passenger apologized and said, I didn’t realize that a little tap would scare you so much.

      The driver replied, Sorry, it’s not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver. I’ve been driving a funeral van for the last 25 years.

      *********

      Two friends are discussing the possibility of love. I thought I was in love three times, one friend says.

      How so? his friend asks.

      Five years ago I deeply cared for a woman who wanted nothing to do with me.

      Was that not love? his friend asks.

      No, he

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