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The Atheist’s Guide to Christmas
The Atheist’s Guide to Christmas
The Atheist’s Guide to Christmas
Audiobook5 hours

The Atheist’s Guide to Christmas

Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

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About this audiobook

Read by Simon Le Bon, Derren Brown, Charlie Brooker, Richard Dawkins, Ben Goldacre, Mitch Benn and more!
In this download there are 38 atheist celebrities, comedians, scientists and writers give their funny and serious tips for enjoying the Christmas season.

When the Atheist Bus Campaign was first launched, over £150,000, was raised in four days - enough to place the advert 'There's probably no God. Now stop worrying and enjoy your life' on 800 UK buses in January 2009. Now dozens of atheist writers, comedians and scientists are joining together to raise money for a very different cause.

The Atheist's Guide to Christmas is a funny, thoughtful handbook all about enjoying Christmas, from 42 of the world's most entertaining atheists. It features everything from an atheist Christmas miracle to a guide to the best Christmas pop hits, and contributors include Richard Dawkins, Charlie Brooker, Derren Brown, Ben Goldacre, Jenny Colgan, David Baddiel, Simon Singh, AC Grayling, Brian Cox and Richard Herring.

LanguageEnglish
Release dateOct 1, 2009
ISBN9780007333325
The Atheist’s Guide to Christmas

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Reviews for The Atheist’s Guide to Christmas

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  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This review refers to the audio version of the book. I found it enjoyable and funny. Who says atheists cannot enjoy Christmas? My only complaint with the audio version is that many of the recordings sound as if they were made on a cheap cell phone in a small bathroom.

    1 person found this helpful

  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Hilarious in the beginning, rather boring in the middle, improving near the end. Many British references to customs, songs, movies, etc. will leave American readers wondering.

    1 person found this helpful

  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Some of the submissions were quite good, and others fairly bad. Many were mediocre.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This book was not what I expected. Some of the stories had nothing to do with Christmas at all, some were just rants, others were personal stories about childhood Christmases. The stories I like the best included: Things to Make and Do at Christmas, The Ironed Trouser: Why 99% of Scientists Are Atheists (Depending on Who You Ask) and Starry, Starry Night.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    I think it is very important that I give you a warning and some background before you get to my review of this book. I am not an Atheist, but I am also not an organized religion type of girl and I also grew up in a family that weren't very religious. My Father was raised Salvation Army and many of his relatives also follow the B'hai religion. My Mom was raised United but didn't attend church much growing up. The only time our family went to Church was for weddings, funerals and way too many bazaars to mention (my mom was a serious crafter). We were raised to respect others beliefs, to help others less fortunate than ourselves, and just to be kind generous people without being told we had to do it or God was going to be pissed off and send us toHell. I know my Dad believed in God, but was against organized religion of any kind. He was very vocal in saying that we all had the right to believe what we wanted, but it was wrong to force our opinions on others.So I pretty much lived the way he lived. I believe in God, but honestly its more like Mulder, in that I want to believe rather than I actually do. Both of my Parents are dead, so it is very comforting to think that they are in Heaven watching over me, and quite frankly getting a laugh over all the trouble my kids give me (because they know I totally deserve it). I'm also a parent so I want there to be a Heaven so that when I die I can still watch over them (and probably lmao when their kids torture them). I also like to believe in a gentle God who obviously has a weird sense of humour, and who is totally ok with my views on him. A lot of my healthy skepticism about God comes from history, not to mention science. Look at all the wars that have happened in Gods name (or Allah, etc) -- and quite frankly if God approves of that, well than I would rather go to Hell than to Heaven (and laugh with the sinners like Billy Joel). Also, I have spent many a day at Sick Kids in Toronto and to seen so many innocent children suffering ,so it makes it hard to believe that a God could sit around and watch that happen. And finally I'm sort of pissed at him for taking my Dad away far too early, the world needs more men like my Dad and my kids never got the chance to meet him.I am sorry if my opinions offend anyone, but they are my opinions and I think important to know before you read.The Good Stuff * Ed Byrne's essay is hilarious and has a wonderful point about having a moratorium on any holiday advertising before mid-November * Catie Wilkins essay was wonderful, loved the fact that she sent a letter to both God and the Devil * Many of the essays are very wise on the spirit of Christmas * One of the essays mentions Buffy (David Baddiel and Arvind Ethan David) * Absolutely fascinating essay on the star of Bethlehem * Loved the conversation between and Adam Ruthorford and God in Adam's essay * David Stubbs essay was hilaious and his comments about all the ands in the bible are right on the money * Atheist Barbie - trust me - worth the price of the book * Sian Berry's green suggestions are brilliant and not at all preachy * Charlie Brookers essay on laughter is just plain wonderfulThe Not so Good Stuff * The essays from a science point of view are way over my head * Some of the essays are a little boringFavorite Quotes/Passages"I find him in the bedroom with the lovely Nativity book his devout -and devoted-granny has sent him (even though he hasn't been baptized and thus is slightly damned and stuff), agruing with his friend Freya."(Jenny Colgan)"I appreciate all that my mother and my grandmother tried to do. They can't be held responsible for my failed childhood birthdays-they were up against eons of ritual and tradition. Still, if I'd been alive in the fourth century, I could have been sacrificed by pagans, so perhaps I should count my proverbial blessings and be happy that all I had to deal with was losing my birthday to a holiday. It could clearly have been much worse."(Emery Emery)"Keen scholars of Judaism (or readers of the beginning of this piece) will know that, as well as the whole pig issue, dairy products and meat products must be kept separate. So, for example, if you're eating a meat-based bolognaise sauce on pasta, you couldn't put cheese on it to make it, well, nice. Cheeseburgers are out too, because they are nice. Esentially the Jewish God hates the delicious." (Matt Kirshen)"I've never believed in God, but I've never wanted to prevent anyone else from doing so" (Andrew Mueller)What I Learned * Atheist's are extremely accepting of all and really frickin funny * Most Atheists love Christmas * A lot about the Big Bang Theory and its written in an easy to read and understand wayWho should/shouldn't read * This is NOT a book for those who are sensitive about religion in any way * Perfect for those who have a dry sense of humour * My family who will really enjoy and will lead to some interesting and hilarious conversations * Dad you would have loved it -- Miss ya! (Tell Mom to stop laughing when Jesse gives me a hard time - I wasn't that bad!)4.5 Dewey'sI received this from HarperPerennial in exchange for an honest review
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Summary: Just because you don't believe in Christ, doesn't mean you shouldn't have a very merry Christmas. That's the position taken by The Atheist's Guide to Christmas, a collection of forty-two* short pieces that is the outgrowth of the Atheist Bus Campaign, a project in which buses in the UK sported ads that read "There's probably no God. Now stop worrying and enjoy your life." (*Douglas Adams reference fully intentional.) The essays are divided into six sections: stories, science, how to, philosophy, arts, and events, and touch on everything from Christmas dinner to traditional Christmas hymns, the star of Bethlehem, the best use of Christmas decorations, what to get your favorite atheist for Christmas, and how to get into the holiday spirit even when you don't believe in the Holy Spirit. All in all, the essayists in this book take Paul Krassner's suggestion for the 11th Commandment: "Thou shalt not take thyself too goddamned seriously."Review: The introduction to this book starts off brilliantly. Any book that starts with a Douglas Adams reference is likely to get high marks from me, I was laughing out loud by the second paragraph, and was fully ready to believe the editors when they promised funny, insightful, Christmas-themed essays that were "safe to leave around your grandmother." And, for the most part, that's what they delivered. Large chunks of this book were really well done, and there were spots that I would go so far as to call brilliant. If I tried to type up every passage that made me laugh, we'd be here until Easter (or the spring equinox, take your pick.) For example, while I got a good chuckle out of Catie Wilkins's observation that "anyone who says it [the Christmas story] is the greatest story ever told clearly hasn't read Watchmen", Jennifer McCreight's suggestion that you buy the atheists on your gift list "grayscale crayons, to represent how atheists view a bleak world devoid of divine purpose and meaning" had me roaring with laughter. (Don't even get me started on the diagram illustrating the accessories that come with Atheist Barbie.)And amidst all of the funny business, there were some really good insights about Christmas, and some - dare I say, inspirational - sections about celebrating the holiday with love, joy, goodwill towards men, and a sense of reverence towards something bigger than ourselves. I particularly liked Simon Singh's suggestion of using Christmas to celebrate not the birth of Christ, but the birth of the universe (hey, the Big Bang could have happened on 25 December, 13.7 billion BCE), by taking a minute to listen to white noise on the radio, which includes traces of cosmic radiation that's been around since the beginning. I also appreciated Mitch Benn's more tongue-in-cheek point that "if only practicing Christians can use the word "Christmas," then only Vikings can use the word "Thursday.""Unfortunately, and somewhat obviously, being an atheist does not automatically make one a brilliant essayist. (If only.) There's a distinct sense that some of the contributers were picked for their (lack of) beliefs rather than their writing ability or comedic chops, and some of the essays lose the thread a little bit. They're in the minority, but a number of the essays read like extended arguments in favor atheism, which - to use a rather ironic metaphor - is a serious case of preaching to the choir. We're reading this book; we're already convinced. There's also a rather larger subsection of essays that touch on Christmas only glancingly, and a few not at all. They're not bad in and of themselves, but I wish the editors had stepped in with a little more direction: if I'm reading a book about Christmas, I actually want to be reading about Christmas, y'know?The only other thing that bugged me about this book was that more than a few of the authors seemed to take great pleasure in slagging off on agnostics as being wishy-washy wafflers who are unable to make up their minds, when in fact, the scientific method that everyone is so fond of says that it's impossible to prove a negative (i.e. the non-existence of God) - hence the "probably" in the Atheist Bus Campaign slogan that was the jumping off point for this entire book. It's undoubtedly one of my personal hot-buttons, but I get tired of agnostics getting picked on just for daring to suspect that human beings might not yet have all the answers. 3.5 out of 5 stars.Recommendation: Whether you're a hard-line atheist or a secular humanist, if your reaction to the "reason for the season" folks is to start talking about fourth century priests co-opting the druidic winter solstice celebrations in order to encourage converts, then you'll find something in The Atheist's Guide to Christmas to hold your interest, make you laugh, and help you have a very Merry Christmas indeed.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This book is like a box of chocolates. 42 men and women adding their 5p worth on the vague topic of atheism and christmas. Contributions are split into science, stories, art, philosophy etc. Some genuinely very good entries and a fair few fair ones.All in a great cause as well. So get it for that church going relative for Xmas.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    A collection of short essays by various (mainly British) atheists. It's highly eclectic, ranging from the humorously silly to the earnestly serious. Many of these pieces are specifically Christmas-themed, featuring personal anecdotes, or how-to holiday tips, or musings on what Christmas actually means for those who don't believe in Christ. Others deal with science or philosophy or atheist activism, touching on Christmas only tangentially, if at all. They're all very short, and the overall the collection feels pretty lightweight. I did find it pleasant, though, if only because reading it at this time of year gives me a happy, warm, you-are-not-alone feeling, along with a reassuring sense that, why, yes, it is okay to be an atheist at Christmastime, and it doesn't mean you're a dirty hypocrite if you happen to enjoy carols and eggnog.And the profits for this book go to an AIDS-related charity in the UK, so I can even feel good about myself for buying it, as opposed to feeling guilty for adding yet another volume to the To-Read Pile.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Ok, I am an atheist who kinda likes some of the aspects of Christmas. This book gave me some reasons to feel fewer qualms about celebrating the holiday - or, it would have, if I'd had any qualms. But mostly it just bored me. I dunno, I'm guessing it would work better for people who are 1. curious about atheists or 2. doing some soul-searching.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    As with any collection of essays, the quality is mixed, but the good ones are very good (Derren Brown and Ed Byrne for instance) while the ones I didn't care for I skimmed.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This book gets out every year. I recall several of the stories and I just love to read them over and over during the advent season. Christmas brings out my sentimental and emotional side that is virtually hidden the rest of the year. Don't tell anyone that I recommend this book of soppy tales and legends! It has been known to bring a tear or two to my eyes!
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    Who remembers the Atheist Bus Campaign? When I first heard about it, I couldn’t decide whether to be delighted or appalled. Atheism, in general, is not a movement or an organisation or in any way controlled. It’s about individuals choosing logic over dogma, and rejecting the idea of an overarching consciousness controlling the universe. To have a campaign about it seemed, to me, to go against the principles behind atheism. I eventually decided it was amusing and forgot about it.Fast forward to Oct 2009 when Harper Collins sent me a copy of The Atheist’s Guide to Christmas to review. I had no idea they’d even made a book from the campaign.It turns out that the campaign and the book were created by the British Humanist Society. Driving force Ariane Sherine has gathered 42 short stories and articles celebrating atheism, talking about life without religion, about the universe, space, humans and what we are.It’s brilliant. Entertaining, moving, thought-provoking and elevating, there’s something in this collection for everyone.It’s not a book about bashing the religious. It’s a book about Christmas for those of us who just do it for family, for friends, for companionship, without the underlying Christian message.And it’s funny. The writers that editor Sherine has chosen have done a lovely job of bringing out the human in humanist, and reminding us about what it is that makes us who we are.Like the meaning of Christmas, in The Real Christmas Story by Jenny Colgan: Christmas, as a practicing Catholic child, was seen as a reward for lots and lots and lots of church.Or sharing your birthday with Jesus, in A Child was Born on Christmas Day by Emery Emery: Every birthday party I attended was clearly a day set aside specifically to celebrate one person’s most important life event…but as it turns out, Jesus was born of a virgin on December 25th and they deem it a miracle. How can any kid compete with that?And I dare you to read Nick Doody’s excellent article, How to Understand Christmas: A Scientific Overview and not laugh: Robins, as is well known, have an unusually high level of natural Yule – far higher than a mouse.But it’s not all humour. For the scientifically inclined, there’s the wonderful Starry, Starry Night by Phil Platt, or one of my favourites, The Large Hadron Collider: A Scientific Creation Story by Brian Cox: About 13.7 billion years ago, something interesting happened and our universe began.There’s also a great How-To section; How to Have a Peaceful Pagan Christmas, I’m Dreaming of a Green Christmas and How to Decorate the Outside of Your House, and Not Have All Your Neighbours Hate You.I thoroughly enjoyed reading this collection, and would recommend it as a great gift for the hard-to-buy-for person in your life. It’s a book for the thinker, the skeptic, the logical. A really wonderful experience.