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Alison Barthwell
Americans require more personal space
My family visited Arizona, once,opting to visit the red and orange reaching desert.After viewing spiraling towers crafted from ice floes, and rivers,and other miracles of earth, metropolitan fathers still drove the rental car.Museums and Rocky steps lead to proper fun. Not marveling in God’s splendor  but exploring psychologyand the mind. My father and I found drops of creamy carpet to explain personal space. Closer and closer until we burst into laughter.Two dots merging to form a figure 8.So what happens when two teenagers go closer and closer until two bodies form a figure 11? What bursts out then? Nothing,they both know they’re too close, they both can see sparkling flecks of gold in eachother’s eyes.I counted his freckles, marking each one as a placeI longed to touch, to visit - to burn into my fingertips.But somehow, my white-stiched-bowling-“esque” shoeswere more beautiful than his face.My eyes wanted to build some Dionysus temple for him because his drinking was so darn cute.One step closer,one inch more,our noses would kiss before we would.But we started walking and he told me whenhe graduated from his mother.In the 11
th
month, one year before me.One year before now, my father and I learned that after 14 years, personal space existed.One year later, figure 11’s slid closer but couldn’t makeone.
 
Sorry I’m So Stupid
You rested in my arms between us purple suede and7 sheets of language.When you stared at me with earnestly,devotion,inexcusable cuteness,there is nothing I would have done faster than answer youwith my braids lowering to create a cage for us.But I questioned you – splitting puppy dog eyes intomarshmallow bites.Can’t we go back to drunk stumbling of side streets?Pressing hands into soft serve cotton?Sharing ice cream flavors and being shoved into mock kisses?The chance rose again, leaning in my door, framed in laundry darkness.Grinning, you stood, being worldlywith raised eyebrows and pursed lips.Laughter from the stairs, and again, I extinguished you, pushing you out of my house.Asking for an awkward hug, I didn’t feel your body next to mine.Craving the smile I’d seen earlier. Wanting your facenext to mine, staring into rainless eyesthat split me into marshmallow fragments.I wished I hadn’t crushed you butmy incredulous heart led me into you andcouldn’t express how my enchantment is woken up by side street smiles.
 
Broken English Sounds Good on Kneecaps
Standing under the golden drizzle of leaves.Hearing autumn around us in children’s backpackszipping open ambitious mouths for schoolwork.Smelling grinding bike wheels,tearing tattered concrete into ribbons of rock.Coffee pots of tension boiled over into frog-like hands grasping each other.Trying to resist mistakes of boyfriends past because a gliding thumb slid open doors thatshould have stayed closed.But thumbs cannot stay so silent when forced intodenim kneecaps.When broken English taughtsimple clucks and coos,thumbs roam into unnamed backs of hands.It’s not the palm, it’s never the wrist, but the joint of thumb and hand.Filling empty palms with mangled bamboo joints.Loading joints with stonewashed wrists.As lonely thumbs glide to uncover locks,denim kneecaps bend and broken English blends with early school year homework.
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