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Tao of Badass Monogamy vs Polyamory

Tao of Badass Monogamy vs Polyamory

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Published by: datingbooks on Oct 11, 2012
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08/29/2014

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Monogamy vs.Polyamory
 
Monogamy vs.Polyamory
 
Monogamy vs.Polyamory
 
Monogamy vs.Polyamory
Once you’ve built condence in yourself and the material we’vegone over in this book, you’ll start meeting lots of women and you’llhave to decide whether you want to be with one woman or several women at the same time. I know that the natural response of mostmen will be “Of course I want to be with several women!” but being a “player” and being polyamorous are two very different things. Aplayer lies to the women he’s with so that they have no idea he’sseeing other people. This doesn’t even require actively lying – aplayer can easily deceive the women he’s dating without lying outright.Polyamory, in contrast, means having many relationships at the sametime with the consent of all involved. A lot of guys consider this tobe the holy grail of dating, but it’s not difcult to achieve when youunderstand the rules, and you understand why polyamory works and what the benets are. To be polyamorous successfully, you must alsobe aware of the negative aspects of having open relationships andknow how to tell when polyamorous relationships aren’t going to work out.Personally, I feel that you should only be monogamous with someone when you feel that there’s a chance that you could be in love with
 
notesMonogaMy vs. PolyaMory 
2
that person. If you can’t see yourself marrying someone after being  with her for a while, then you’re wasting her time and your time by continuing the relationship.Let’s talk about serial monogamy for a moment, because serialmonogamy is something that a lot of men and women experience. A serial monogamist is someone who bounces from relationship torelationship without ever really nding the person they’re looking for. They’re single only for short periods of time, and latch onimmediately when they nd someone new to be in a relationship with. Think of this desperate desire to have a relationship as a race withhurdles. A relationship is the nal hurdle, so to get to it you have tojump over a lot of other hurdles rst. If, like a lot of guys, you’retoo focused on the last hurdle, you won’t clear any of the other onesbecause you’re not paying enough attention to them. You won’t evenmake it to the last one!If you go out in search of women who are looking for relationships,you won’t be able to create attraction, build rapport, have sexualtension and attraction, and ultimately gain the interest of the womanthat you desire because you’ll be so focused on the end goal that you will ignore the process. Approaching relationships in this way causesa great deal of neediness, which is incredibly unattractive to women. To gure out if monogamy or polyamory is right for you, you mustexamine your relationship, in the most honest way possible, andask “Is this woman going to have everything necessary to makeme comfortable with being with her for the rest of my life?” Thisdoesn’t necessarily mean that you’re going to marry her – it just

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