the product of caffeine-static, although at the time Ithought I was getting somewhere. Wishful thinking. And that is how it began. As a sidebar, I know I must sound like a teetotaller when I speak of giving up coffee. I did it willingly andthere is a trail of things I gave up stretching back into
my past. I wrote about all of my “addictions” here for those interested in in a booklet called “The Loss of
Substance: Stories and Notes on Ad
http://astrologysoftware.com/books/index.asp?orig=It was at first through sleep that I could relax enoughto allow the answers that were in my mind (andwaiting for me) to emerge. If my mind was clear (unaltered by caffeine or whatever), those inner answers would just be there and waiting for me whenI woke up. They would just pop to mind and I wouldbe aware of them. It seems so obvious now.However, it took me a long time to grasp that it wasmy own inability to relax and let the mind speak thatwas holding me back. It was like driving with a jerkyclutch (for those old enough to remember manualclutches). I would kind of lurch forward by jerks andstops. I had little control over it because rather thanlet it come to me, I would always reach forward and
try to “get” it. And that never worked.
Anyway this went on for many years, two stepsforward, and one step back. I was getting the answersI wanted, but I did not exactly understand how. It waslike rubbing my tummy and patting my head at thesame time. It was not easy to do.Yet I gradually stopped searching through books andbegan to unearth treasures in my mind. Theseincluded a number of astrological techniques that had