CHAPTER TWENTY

CHECK

‘Wait,’ The Manager said before he ordered his first piece forward. ‘What is the meaning
of this?’
‘Of what?’ Raljex asked, massaging one of his temples.
‘I seem to be a piece short,’ The Manager said, pointing to the place where his Queen’s
Bishop should be. ‘I don’t know Chess, but I know that I should have sixteen pieces to
begin with.’
‘You have sixteen pieces,’ Raljex said simply. ‘Your final participant is not one the
board for various reasons. But treat the situation as though he were. The logic will
become clear as we progress.’
‘And who, might I add is this final participant?’ The Manager asked curtly. ‘Another
hideous thing from the bowels of the Universe?’ He snapped, casting a sideways glance at
Richtocorricas Alpha, whose damaged circuitry sparked and fizzled, causing involuntary
spasms in his remaining robotic arms.
‘It depends on your view,’ Raljex said simply, snapping his fingers and causing a stone
effigy of a Bishop piece to appear on the empty square. ‘We shall see in time. Now,
begin the match!’

The Dr. surveyed the people that Raljex had put on the board as his pieces. He
found a lump in his throat as he looked at his friends and realized just how much he
could benefit each one of them. Could he really play to win now? Could he truly be so
selfish as to deny them their happiness? Maybe he wouldn’t have to. If he could still win
the match, the pieces that he’d loose would still get their redemption. He wasn’t all too
sure about how to play the game, but surely he wouldn’t need all of them to win.
There were people here that he could really help. Raljex had already pointed out
Manhunter, who was serving as his Queen’s side Rook next to Will-ko as a Knight, then
Skelifish as a Bishop. Roxy was next in the space for the Queen piece, she had been
unfortunate enough to get embroiled in the sinking of the Titanic by a band of evil
dimension-jumping penguins who now served her. The Dr. had accidentally left her in
the early nineties, rather than returning her to her own time. Next there was The Dr.
himself as the King piece, then the Dr.’s still comatose 12 th incarnation as the King’s
bishop, Freaka-chu as the other Knight and Fred on the end as the other Rook.
Then there were the pawns, Red –who had an unfortunate encounter with The
Dr.’s Third Incarnation as he battled The Manager that had cost him his job and almost
his sanity– He’d been so much recently, it hardly seemed fair that he was involved in this
mess at all; then there was Duffy, who’s planet had been invaded and subsequently
destroyed because of the GEPS System from Earth’s future; next in line was Angelus who
had been influenced and taken advantage of by the affiliates of the Dark who had then
turned him into a demon. Next to him was Danny who had grown up with Will-ko, Fred
and L96A1 in a lab, having horrific experiments performed on him in an attempt to make
him into a super-power-sucking-sponge. CooCooKaJoo was in front of The Dr., ruffling
his feathers next to Jeebus, who had overheard the battle plans of the invisible Crouton
invaders as a child and grown up deranged and possibly criminally insane in the belief
that it was pigeons that he had been listening to, his dead dog Waldo lay festering at his
feet. L96A1 stood to attention on the next square, his narrowed eyes darting from one
person to the next, no doubt deciding if there was anybody here that he was programmed
to assassinate due to his programming. Last in the line of pawns was-
‘Beakedbard?’ The Dr. frowned. ‘What went wrong in his life?’
Raljex chuckled. ‘I wouldn’t begin to imagine, Dr.,’ The Supreme Being said
haughtily. ‘If you would like to know what secrets this Hippy-Gypsy-’
‘Hippo!’ Beakedbard corrected, taking out a bag of marijuana and rolling himself a spliff.
‘Whatever,’ Raljex sighed. ‘If you wish to know, then send him fourth into battle and
find out.’
‘Do you know what he’s talking about?’ The Dr. asked across the board.
‘Meh,’ Beakedbard shrugged. ‘You mean aside from all the effort I keep having to put in?’
He thought for a moment. ‘There was all that stuff a while back about my destiny being
something important and stuff … I was supposed to be King of something, but it was a
really long quest that I had to go on …but it all sounded like …’
‘Too much effort,’ The Dr. sighed knowingly as The Manager made his first move across
the board and sent his Sixth Incarnation (who was serving as his Queen’s Bishop’s Pawn)
forward two spaces.
‘There,’ The Manager said with a definite hint of uncertainty in his voice. ‘Have at you,
Dr.!’
‘Oh yeah?!’ The Dr. retorted, clenching his fists and snapping his fingers. He really had
no idea what he was doing. He was sure that it was good form to move the Pawns first.
He just had to decide how he was going to go about it, and which one he was going to
move forwards.
Each decision he made would have to be weighed carefully. Raljex had promised
the seemingly impossible. There would be so much irreparable damage to the time
stream if he went through with his “Redemption” proposal that it would be foolish to
think anything would be the same again.
‘Anybody fancy going first?’ He offered to his assortment of friends.
‘Aye, go on then,’ L96A1 said, strolling two paces forward. ‘He squinted ahead of him at
the line of Managers and raised his gun at them. Nigel Martin was on his list, killing any
one of them would do. Alpha was still alive too, that was an issue he would need to
resolve. He pointed the gun at the Manager ahead of him, whichever one it was didn’t
particularly matter to him (though in this instance, it was The Second). He pulled the
trigger and – nothing happened.
‘Dearie me!’ Raljex thundered. ‘You didn’t actually expect that to work did you?! If
ranged-combat was allowed in Chess, there’d be no entertainment value
whatsoever!’
‘NEIL!’ The Dr. shouted. ‘Didn’t you hear what he said?’ The Dr. shouted despairingly at
Neil who was still trying to fire at The Managers.
‘A know a cannae hit ‘em, but ‘ave got tae try. A cannae help it man, if you’re gonna get
one o’ us outa here, send me in first would yea? Otherwise, I’ll still be out tae kill all of
yous … no offence,’ he added to the other Allucians present.
‘Yeah,’ The Dr. said, balling his fists. ‘Yeah Neil, don’t worry, I’ll sort it out.’
‘My move!’ The Manager interrupted from across the board with a triumphant hand
gesture. Then he stopped because he was completely unsure of what to do next. He
looked around his other incarnations who shrugged at him.
‘… If I may …’ Alpha wheezed from next to The Manager. ‘I have … studied Chess … With
my knowledge … I am … better than the … greatest … Grand-Master …’
‘Perfect!’ The Manager shouted, clapping his hands. ‘I knew you were here for a reason,
good show Raljex,’ he winked at The Supreme Being.
‘Too bad he can’t help you,’ Raljex said evenly.
The smile disappeared from The Manager’s face. ‘The-who-with-the-what-now?’
‘I said, he cannot help you. This is a battle between yourself and The Dr., you cannot
confer with your playing pieces.’
‘But that’s not fair!’ The Manager cursed loudly. ‘You can’t give me a fucking Grand
Master and then tell me I can’t use him! That’s beyond evil! That’s! That’s! … …’
‘Exactly what you would do if you were in my position,’ Raljex said simply.
The Manager flashed a toothy grin. ‘Exactly,’ he smiled and ran a hand through
his hair. ‘Oh, very good … okay then! I’ll make my own moves,’ he mulled over the pieces
at his disposal. He turned to his fifth incarnation, serving as the Queen’s pawn and
moved him forward one space, forming a diagonal line of pawns before him.
The Dr. wasn’t about to waste any more time. A slight glance at the ever-
worsening form of his twelfth incarnation spurred him into action. He would have to play
the piece and lose it quickly if he had any chance of saving his future-self’s life. He
moved his twelfth form to the open space that L96A1 had left and ended his turn.
 The Manager, realizing that The Dr. could move his twelfth incarnation diagonally
across the board and threaten him directly, Nigel did the decidedly decent thing and
moved Ranette forward one space to block the possibility. She was expendable, he was
not. The Dr. saw the Manager’s quick defensive play, but as stupid as it sounded, even to
him, The Dr. was not going after Nigel just yet. His plan was to save as many of his
friends as possible first. He’d have to play as offensively as possible with the people that
needed his help the most. He had a chance to right a lot of wrongs here, some of which
were his own doing. With that in mind, he moved his twelfth incarnation across the
board and took The Manager’s seventh incarnation from the board.
‘You will regret that, Dr.,’ The Manager growled and moved his blank bishop upwards to
take The Dr.’s twelfth incarnation. He had considered allowing the suffering Dr. to sit
there ideally as long as possible to see if he would die before help arrived, but if Nigel did
not act, he would possibly loose his blank Bishop piece or his tenth incarnation that was
serving as his Rook.
The first two casualties of the match were decided, and both Video Lords were
down a piece each. The Manager had only lost a Pawn, he knew that they were decidedly
insignificant, but The Dr. had stupidly thrown away a Bishop, one of the most important
pieces. He was a fool, a dead fool.

‘There,’ The Dr. said, turning to Raljex as the lost pieces appeared at either side of the
board in a flash of white light. ‘I’ve lost a piece, now give him the Redemption that you
promised and save his life!’
Raljex cocked his head to one side. ‘I believe you misunderstood me, Dr.,’ Raljex
said silkily. ‘I will grant your lost pieces their Redemption, have no fear, but I will
not do it as they leave the board. No, no. The process will not begin until the game
reaches its end.’
‘But that’s not fair! He needs help!’ The Dr. exploded.
At this, The Manager burst out into a hysterical fit of laughter. ‘Oh, this gets
better and better!’ He chortled. ‘Face facts, Dr., your twelfth incarnation is doomed! I
don’t know why you are trying so desperately to save him anyway. You should
concentrate on your friends. Once you lose this game, all of your incarnations will be
wiped from existence. There is no escape for any of them, there is no Redemption for
you.’

The Dr. balled his fists and fixed the Manager with a steely gaze. He was about to
return with a profanity when Freaka-chu cut across him. ‘You seem so very sure of
yourself, Manager,’ Freaka-chu called across the board. ‘You’ve had it in your head this
whole time that you can’t lose. You seem so very confident, but there’s one thing that you
keep forgetting,’ the cursed Venchamon pointed squarely at The Dr. ‘You forget that this
guy here, this guy … he’s the hero. You’re a petty villain, Manager. You can win all the
battles you like, but in the end, the hero always comes out on top, no matter what you
throw at him.’
‘Did you here that Nigel?’ The Dr. said, as an automatic smile came to his lips. ‘I’m the
hero. I’m the hero!’
‘Oh, do shut up and make your next move,’ The Manager snarled. ‘People are only heroes
in context. Will they still follow you when they learn who you really are, Dr.? Will they
still rally to your side when they learn of what you have and will do? They’re fickle
creatures, all of them. A Judas every one. One by one they’ll turn on you, Dr. It’s my only
regret. That you’ll die here today as their hero and not live long enough to see yourself
become their villain. Now, make your move.’

The Dr. looked around his assortment of assistants and frowned. ‘Do any of you
particularly not want this Redemption thing that Raljex is offering?’
‘I do not!’ Angelus said swiftly, turning on the spot to face The Dr. ‘If it wasn’t for my
stupidity and being bonded to the Sword, I would never have met Arina. I can’t lose her,
Dr. I won’t lose her. I read The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy for her for goodness
sake!’
‘You can go ahead and strike me off your list too,’ Freaka-chu said, folding his arms
defiantly.
‘I thought you wanted your old life back,’ The Dr. frowned. ‘You heard what Raljex said. If
you continue on, you’ll out-live the Universe. There’ll be nothing left until the end of time
but you and … did he say the ghost of the one who cursed you?’
‘Eccsa-chu,’ Freaka-chu nodded. ‘But I’ve done way more good then I ever did in my old
life. Plus, if I didn’t have my … curse … then I’d have died a very long time ago. I’d rather
not do that to be honest with you.’
‘I don’t think there’s many of us that want to forsake the friends we’ve made since we
came to The Mercury Rooms,’ Manhunter spoke up from the end of the row.
‘But what about the Martian race?’ CCKJ spoke up with a flutter of his wings. ‘I know if I
had the choice I’d have it so that my people were never wiped out by the Darlin’s and
Foxtrots. My family was killed in the invasion. I’d very much like to have them back.’
‘The same goes for me,’ Duffy said harshly. ‘My planet and people were destroyed by the
G.E.P.S. System. If that crisis could be averted, then, all for the better.
‘I’m not really bothered either way,’ Beakedbard commented as he took out a bag of weed
and started to roll another joint.
‘I think I need to ask you to send me into battle,’ Skelifish said, gripping his scythe
tightly. ‘I need this, Dr. I’ve lived in shame and exile from my people for far too long. It’s
been a blast knowing you all, but some things are just more important in the long run.’
‘TICK-TOCK!’ The Manager thundered from his side of the board. ‘I do have a millennium
or two but I’d rather not waste them here listening to this soap opera you’ve created, Dr.!’
‘Okay,’ The Dr. tutted as he cracked his knuckles. ‘Just remember,’ he said as he moved
Duffy forward one space. ‘You asked for it.’