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RealizeChapter 1
Beep, Beep, BeepI lifted my hand from under my covers and blindly waved it around to smash the annoying buzzer off on my alarmclock. I took notice of the time-five o’clock. I groaned loudly. It was still dark outside. I laid back into the cushions of my bed and stared at the ceiling. Why, oh why did I ever agree to do this job? I mused to myself as I tried toovercome the strong feeling of drowsiness fighting to overtake my body. Then, I remembered.Oh, that’s right, because Edward. My best friend for as long as I have been alive-thanks to our mothers being bestfriends and all - needed to be tended to. That is pretty much how it had been our whole lives though.Edwards mother Esme, and my mother Renee were roommates in college. They met each other freshman year andhad been attached at the hips since. They each met their husbands at the same party, were engaged and married afew months apart, and both were pregnant together. They even ended up moving into the same neighborhood. Esmehad Edward in June and then Renee had me four months later. From that moment on, Edward and I were always apart of each others lives. Esme was like my second mother, as was Renee to Edward.Going over to Edwards house always made me laugh. If you didn’t know that Carlisle and Esme only had one child,you would think they had two. Along with all the pictures of Edward from birth on up, there were pictures of me aswell. Our first time sitting up, together. First trip to the zoo, together. When we lost our front teeth, again, together. Itwas the same at my mothers house- pictures of Edward were everywhere. We had sleepovers from the time we werelittle to the present. If it was anyone else of the male species, I am sure Charlie would have flipped. Edward -beinglike the son he never had - made him ok to sleep in the same bed with me. He knew nothing was going to happen. Wewere just friends, remember?When it came to school, I was always the one to remind Edward of a homework assignment or a test that we neededto study for. His parents and him were very grateful for my nagging of him. Without it he would never have evenbothered with school.When it came time to apply for colleges, it only made sense to attempt to attend the same one. Neither of us couldpicture being apart from the other one for an extended amount of time. We had talked our -parents into letting us rent an apartment together to save on money and the dreaded ordeal of living with a completestranger, so we moved into an apartment right off campus.One day, Edward was approached by a man on campus telling him he had a face for modeling and handed him hisbusiness card. We laughed about it, Edward said the man probably just wanted to see him naked. A few weeks laterand a serious lack of cash flow, Edward decided to drag me along to see if anything came from the man‘s offer. Boy,did it ever! it seemed right away Edward was being booked for photo shoots and local add campaigns. Soon after, hecaught the eye of a few big wigs over at the T.V. station and began making small appearances in commercials.Shocked by how fast his career had picked up, he sent head shots out to agencies in L.A. and was astonished whenevery single agency seemed to want him. He went with the one that threw the most money at him, and startedworking immediately.He was participating in a fashion show during fashion week in New York when he caught the eye of a director whothought he had the perfect look for a character in his new movie of a struggling artist who battled a heroine addiction.That movie earned Edward a Golden Globe nomination and sky rocketed him to super star status over night. Sincethen, he had been in constant demand.When things started happening for him he said he couldn’t imagine doing it without me, so I came along to fulfill myrole as the person watching out for him. Making sure he stayed level headed, helping him remember important dates,auditions, and so on. Then, becoming Best friend/ personal assistant extraordinaire.He claimed that he couldn’t see anyone else being his personal assistant other than me. I knew everything there wasto know about him. Plus, who would turn down a job where they got paid for being a best friend and helping him outlike I always did? He mentioned on numerous occasions, that he wouldn’t know how to survive if I wasn’t there beingthe responsible one.
 
Edward was such a wonderful person but he never gave himself enough credit. He was beyond talented in everythinghe tried and everyone knew it. He has been playing concerto style piano since he was in elementary school. Histeacher said she had never seen a child pick up piano so fast nor as well- was a natural. He wrote beautiful musicalpieces off the top of his head. He was passionate about everything- friends, family, and food. When Edward didsomething, he did it all the way. He never half-assed -anything. When it came to his family and friends, they always came first. When he made a promise, he kept it.Edward never lied, he just wasn’t that type.However, since becoming this big star, people only saw him for his outward appearances. I knew better. The peoplewho fell in love with Edward Cullen, the “Movie Star”, didn’t know the real him. They knew he could play piano, buthad never heard his work. They just thought he was a triple threat of perfection, actor/model, and musician. To them,he was the strange bronze disheveled haired actor with a ripped muscled body with abs that just begged to be licked.The actor that sported a perfectly crooked smile that he flashed at any given moment. The actor with the amazingemerald colored eyes that looked too amazing to be real. But to those who loved him, he was so much more then allthat. He was the sweet and fun loving Edward who would do anything to make his loved ones happy.Sure Edward was gorgeous, there was no denying that. I had known it since elementary school when every girl wasdrawn to him like one of those bug zapper lights. Even more so when he started to become the chiseled god he istoday.His personality is what I think kept us friends for so long, though. Although he was beautiful and came from a wealthyfamily, he never let any of that go to his head. When in high school, he was super popular and everyone wanted to behis friend. He was always invited to the biggest parties, and was asked out by the prettiest girls, but never once didany of that matter to him. Instead, he liked to camp and read books, and play his piano or watch really bad horrormovies. Anything and everything always had us rolling on the floor laughing. The fact that he stuck by me no matterwhat all the time made me love him so much.I, on the other hand, wasn’t popular by anyone’s standard. I was the police chief’s nerdy daughter who spent all hertime studying and hanging out with Edward. To all the girls who wanted to date Edward, I was nothing more then hischarity case; the family friend he felt bad for. So that was why he hung out with me. I overheard some of the girls ingym one day talking about all the qualities I lacked in being worthy to be his friend. They mainly involved my looks.My hair was a dull boring brown color that came down past my shoulders. My eyes matched my hair- lifeless browncolor- except, they were hidden behind glasses. My skin was a pale color that was made more noticeable by the darkcolor of my hair. My clothes were all off brand, and all I did was read. Obviously, besides my dreary looks, the factthat I could read at all for pleasure made me a poor match for Edward in their eyes. He found me later that daywalking home instead of riding with him. When he finally got it out of me what was wrong he was upset.- “Bella, you know those people have no idea what they are talking about. You are my very best friend because I can’tlive without you. Who would cook me pancakes every Sunday if it weren’t for you? Who would make sure I was ontime to everything, and who would inspire me to work on my music more? None of them hold half as much interest asyou hold. You along with them, don’t see yourself clearly. You never have. Ignore them. You are beautiful and funnyand so smart! Not to mention you have a super hot best friend.” he was wiping away my tears and I started to laugh. “Promise me Bella, Promise that you won’t listen to them anymore. Only you and I know what we mean to each other,nobody else matters.” he implored as he pushed my the curtain of hair from my face. “I-I promise.” He wrapped his arms around my shoulders, giving me a squeeze.That is how it always was. We were always just the best of friends and he never traded me in for a better model.We had been through everything in our lives up until now together. Through the death of our grandparents, to schooland dances. We shared every detail of our lives with each other and we were the only ones who truly knew the otherone inside and out.He watched me go on many dates that left me without anyone that interested me. He would tell me, “Don’t worryBella, your prince charming is out there. Just you wait and see.” Too bad I had already found that man.
 
Unfortunately, Edward was wrong because this man didn’t notice I was alive.Well, not true. He knew I was alive, alright. I just happened to be alive in his eyes as his dorky, best friend/personalassistant.-Yep, the man of my dreams and my best friend were one in the same. I was stupid enough to fall in love with thesuper attractive, super talented, actor best friend, Edward.I think some part of me had always been in love with Edward. But after attempting to date around, I realized that thereason they never lead to anything more then just a first date was because I spent the whole time comparing them tohim. Some would be cute, but they weren’t him. Some would be super smart, but not as smart as him. Or as funny.It didn’t matter though. It was hopeless. He was a huge actor now, and I got to sit by and watch actresses andmodels throw themselves all over him and him eat it up. I was still just good ole’ best friend, Bella. I was just like asister and nothing more.So, I didn’t say a thing. I don’t need him to tell me what I already knew.When presented with the choice between a beautiful blonde model from Germany to plain Jane Bella who looked likeshe just walked out of the Sears catalogue, who do you think he would pick?I wasn’t stupid, I knew who.So, I decided to keep my feelings to myself and keep my friendship intact. I don’t think I could handle being aroundhim if he told me straight out that I wasn’t his type. I liked to bask in the warmth that is denial.An annoying buzzing brought me out of my self pitying thoughts and I reached over to the nightstand to see it wasmy vibrating Blackberry flashing a reminder to get Edward up for an audition he had today.I threw the covers off my sleep drunken body and stood up slowly. I shuffled my way to my closet to grab someclothes and headed off to the bathroom to shower and get ready for the day.-I took my time letting the warm water trickle down my back to help relax my stiff muscles. Trying to deal with Edwardin the mornings was like dealing with a five year old who wanted candy and refused to take no for an answer. He wasnot a morning person, and it was my job to wake his lazy ass up and deliver him some coffee. It helped that weshared a house together. It made things easier and harder for my situation.Easier, because living with Edward was natural It gave us both comfort to have one another so close. It also madethings easier work wise. Instead of waking up and driving over from a separate home, I just shared one with him. Iwas with Edward all the time anyway, so paying rent for a place I was never at didn‘t make any sense.Harder, because with my current feelings, I got my heart ripped out on a regular basis when I could hear Edwardbringing home another random chick. Or, walking into the kitchen in the morning to fix Edward coffee only to begreeted by a stranger in nothing more then a shirt of Edward‘s. My personal favorite way of having my heart stompedon, was walking into his room for his daily wake up to find that he wasn‘t alone. Seeing his arm curled aroundsomeone else’s body always did a number on my heart.Once I was done showering, I got dressed and threw my hair into a clip and made my way to the kitchen to start thecoffee. I fell into my daily routine by opening the front door and grabbing the paper, lay it on the kitchen table, andthen pop two pop tarts into the toaster. we may be adults now, but pop tarts would always remain Edward and mine’sultimate breakfast food.Once the coffee was done, I made a cup for him and myself then wrapped the now warmed pop tarts into a papertowel and walked to his room.
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