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Stephen Colbert

Stephen Colbert

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Published by Zach Pippin

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Published by: Zach Pippin on Dec 11, 2012
Copyright:Attribution Non-commercial

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07/10/2013

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Stephen Colbert [Col-bear]
In 2007, Colbert Did Not Know The South Carolina State Amphibian, The Spotted Salamander
 MR. RUSSERT:
 
What's the state amphibian?
 
MR. COLBERT:
 
The state amphibian?
 
MR. RUSSERT:
 
Yeah.
 
MR. COLBERT:
 
It's my dog, Cookie. She swims, and she goes on land.
 
MR. RUSSERT:
 
It's the spotted salamander.
 
 
(NBC’s
,” 10/21/07)
 
… Yet 
On December 10, 2012, Stephen Colbert Claimed Nikki Haley Should Be Disqualified ForOffice Because She Did Not Know The State Amphibian, The Spotted Salamander.
COLBERT:
“Because if getting a South Carolina trivia fact wrong
disqualifies you for office, then Nikki Haley would
have stepped down after saying this. [Video Clip Begins] COLBERT: What’s the state am
phibian? HALEY:
Ooh. COLBERT: Oh, how’s it feel when the spiked shoe is on the other foot? It’s the spotted salamander.[Video Clip Ends]. Oh, do you know the state dish governor? It’s revenge. Best served cold with a side of 
salamander milk. So nation, do
not give up the fight. Keep tweeting Governor Haley why I’d make an idealsenator using the hashtag #SpottedSalamander.”
(Comedy Central’s
,” 12/10/12) Minute 15:38
 Stephen Colbert Claimed H
e Would “
Stumble Around Columbia, The Capital, Like, Pantless With ABottle Of Jack Daniels And Try To Get Arrested;
 TERRY GROSS:
 
So I always have to ask myself when you do that, when you're either on the ballot orhave a surrogate on the ballot, like is that going too far? Is that actually injecting it into the voting boothin a way that might actually change the results of an election?
 
 
STEPHEN COLBERT:
 
I mean if I actually thought I would change the results of the election, I think Iwould - I would think I was going too far, but I never for a moment thought I would change the results of the election and I think I was right.
 
TERRY GROSS:
 
Because you wouldn't get enough votes to make a difference?
 
STEPHEN COLBERT:
 
No, I would never get enough votes.
 
TERRY GROSS:
 
With elections being so close in some places?
 
STEPHEN COLBERT:
 
Not in South Carolina.
 
TERRY GROSS:
 
Not in South Carolina.
 
STEPHEN COLBERT:
 
Just the Republicans. I don't know what to say.
 
TERRY GROSS:
 
Yeah, right.
 
STEPHEN COLBERT:
 
You know, even in - even four years ago when I was running in 2008 in SouthCarolina and really sincerely like tried to get on the ballot, if I was doing well, I had a plan of how to dropout, which was that I was going to have a scandal.
 (LAUGHTER)
STEPHEN COLBERT:
 
I was going to like...
 
TERRY GROSS:
 
Oh, I'm sorry you didn't get a chance.
 
STEPHEN COLBERT:
 
I know. Wasn't that exciting? I would've been wonderful. I wanted to like actuallygo down to South Carolina and like stumble around Columbia, the capital, like pantless with a bottle of Jack Daniels and try to get arrested.
 
(National Public Radio’s
,” 10/4/12)
 
Colbert Attended A South Carolina Trade Conference, In His Words,
“Representing Iran”
 
COLBERT: “For All Intents And Purposes, I Am Here Representing Iran.”
(Stephen Colbert, Remarks At The S.C.International Trade Conference,Charleston, SC, 5/23/2006) MINUTE 1:32
 
Stephen Colbert Demanded To Be Named Keith Olbermann’s “Worst Person In The World” And
Used A Puppy To Slap A Baby To Make His Case
Colbert Demanded To Be Named The “Worst Person In The World.”
COLBERT: “And why not hold
me to the same standards as othe
rs in the conservative media? I’m just as much a journalist as Fox News.Keith Olbermann, I demand, I demand you name me the worst person in the world. Here, here. I’m gonna
help. I am now going to slap a baby with this puppy. Bring on the baby, bring on t 
he baby. No, we’re goingto do this.”
(
 7/15/09)
 
Minute 2:20
 
Colbert Claimed He Changed His Name, Since Leaving
South Carolina, “To Get Cultural Elites On MySide”
 FOX NEWS BILL O'REILLY:
 
Colbert, that's a French name, is it not?
 
COLBERT:
 
It's a French name, just to get the cultural elites on my side, Bill. I'm as Irish as you. I'm aCormie (ph), I'm an O'Neal. I'm a Tuck. I'm a Phee. I'm a Connolly.
 

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Sylvia Scarlett added this note
I'd vote for him.
Lisa Kimbrell Hutchinson added this note
Well that didn't take long. DISQUALIFIED FAIL!
Jeffrey Stewart added this note
Stevie is torn between his liberal benefactors and his immense wealth. Typical pretentious liberal.
Patricia Sauls added this note
since haley has said experience doesn´t count, i think you should put you up there
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MR. RUSSERT: "What's the state amphibian?” MR. COLBERT: “The state amphibian?” MR. RUSSERT: “Yeah.” MR. COLBERT: “It's my dog, Cookie. She swims, and she goes on land.” MR. RUSSERT: “It's the spotted salamander.”
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