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THE DIET OF DINGOES:NED KELLY AND NEWS FROM DOWN UNDERTim and Stacy had work the next day, and so Kate and Ispent the majority of our time conducting a careful study ofdaytime television in Australia, which resulted in a number ofwonderful naps, and the realization that all daytime soap operashave more complicated plots than a James Joyce novel. The onewe were watching involved (and I’m serious here) a jealous eviltwin sister that was trying to kill her good sister’s lover, whohimself had just returned from a two year hiatus on a desertedisland where he became a vampire, though no one seemed to noticehis new obsession with raw meat or fear of sunlight.Our only other options in regard to TV channels involvedthe Olympic swimming event, which we watched far longer than anyperson should watch people move back and forth in a straightline, but mostly we stuck to the unfolding drama in the soft-litworld of daytime television.When it comes to television Australia falls short. Thiswas at least the conclusion that I came to sitting on the sofa.In fact, apart from the government sponsored AustralianBroadcasting Corporation--which airs such titillating shows as
 
Billy and Ben and the Flowerpot Men and the pornographicsounding Bananas in Pyjamas--most Australian television isimported from the United States and involves a disturbing numberof CNN sub-channels (CNN Entertainment news, CNN Food network,CNN Money, Auto, you get my drift) that leaves any channelsurfing viewer desperate for a good explosion or car chase.Then again, Australia has characteristically been behindthe television curve for some time. Consider that the ABCnetwork (not to be confused with the American ABC network)started as a radio station in the 1930s and moved ontotelevision when television transmission began in Australia in1956. A bit behind the power curve (the BBC had beenbroadcasting for twenty-six years by this time) color televisionwouldn’t come around until 1975, when the rest of the world wasdealing with remote controls and Betamax. This is stillfourteen years before Australia chose a national anthem, andthirteen years before it had a Parliament building, so,internally, it seemed they were on track. But to the rest ofthe world, they were slacking.Or so it would seem. What’s truly shocking is just howlimber their broadcast restrictions were, soap operas
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especially, but namely a show called Number 96.
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When the restof the world was watching The Brady Bunch, The Little House onthe Prairie or pondering the title of the children’s show H.R.Pufnstuf, the soap opera Number 96 was exploring such topics ashomosexuality, drug use, rape-within-marriage, sex, adultery,and full blown nudity. Sadly, the closest we’ve come totelevised nudity involved Janet Jackson and the painfullyinfamous “wardrobe malfunction” of 2004, which, sorry to say,wasn’t much to look at.
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 But nudity was just the beginning for Number 96 (the namealone is rather risqué). Even the character biographies are anadventure to read and hint at just how saucy this show got:The original cast featured Abigail, the show's firstbig star, who portrayed blond sex-kitten Bev Houghton,a virtuous harbor-cruise hostess and daughter of PointPiper socialite Claire Houghton. In one earlystoryline naïve Bev disastrously fell in love with hergay law-student neighbor Don Finlayson. After that
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One exception occurred at the outbreak of World War II in 1940,when the war was still 7,000 miles away and censorshiprestrictions were so tight even weather reports were censored.
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Australians have always seemed far more comfortable with exposedskin than Americans, though. In 1907 the Australian swimmerAnnette Kellerman was arrested for indecent exposure in theUnited States for showing her legs, arms, and neck.
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