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Sleeping With Conservatives

Sleeping With Conservatives

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Published by Ian Thorpe
In Britain and the USA society is becoming more polarised. In internet comment threads people on opposite sides of the political divide find it impossible to be civil to each other. But we do not live by politics alone so what happens when we fall in love with someone of a different political persuasion. Bohemian, former Liberal Party candidate and aging roue Ian Thorpe recounts some of his experiences of Sleeping with Conservatives.
In Britain and the USA society is becoming more polarised. In internet comment threads people on opposite sides of the political divide find it impossible to be civil to each other. But we do not live by politics alone so what happens when we fall in love with someone of a different political persuasion. Bohemian, former Liberal Party candidate and aging roue Ian Thorpe recounts some of his experiences of Sleeping with Conservatives.

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Published by: Ian Thorpe on Jan 22, 2013
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 Sleeping With Conservatives
Could You Hug A Conservativeasked a feature in The Guardian newspaper sometime ago. Several typical Guardian writers describe their feelings of fear and loathingwhen, purely in the interests of science of course, they hugged prominent members of the Conservative Party. In a response to that the excellent Lucy Mangan describeswhat it is like to be a typical labour voting, politically correct thinking, right on leftie journalist and be married to a Conservative. And yet she loves her Tory - Boy hubby.Apart from proving that we cannot control who we fall in lust with this is a veryamusing article.Our Guide To The Conservative Psyche.What I find disturbing about all this is the American belief, patricularly stongamong Obama's supporters (and before you ask, yes I've heard he does still have
 
Christine Keeler, the girl who brought down aConservative government, in the iconic JacobsonChair photo
 
some who have not been totally reduced to idiocy by excessive kool aid drinking)that we must hate all those who differ from us politically and only communicate withconservatives by shouting “fascist” across an ever widening divide as they shout back “limp wristed namby pamby diorreah dollop.” When I was politically active as amember and candidate in the now superseded Liberal Party it was possible to have adrink and trade comical canvassing tales with members of the Labour andConservative parties.Labour were a bit more difficult, aside from their authoritarian tendencies theywere simply unable to understand how people could possibly hold a different opinionto theirs and still maintain repitilian functions like breathing and a pulse, but apartfrom that and being extremely bar shy they could be OK.Things have changed a lot since then. Margaret Thatcher must take much of the blame; she made it immoral if not quite a criminal offence not to hate and despiseanyone less wealthy than oneself and as already remarked on, we have also importedsome bad habits from America. And where has all this blinkered intolerance got us?Look at the politicians we have now on all sides. Tossers to a man (or woman thoughI'm not sure how a woman qualifies as a tosser, maybe frotter is the femaleequivalent.) The problem is people now take it all too seriously. For Heaven’s sakeit’s only politics. It's not as if peoples' lives were at stake.The interesting thing about Lucy Mangan’s article though is the description of theway a Labour and a Conservative supporter who share a bed react to each other whennot in bed. It raises another question though, why should it seem strange that aconservative and a socialist should have a sexual relationship? I know Progressivesand Labour types like to think of themselves as “the liberal left” but there is nothingliberal about them, populist authoritarianismis a more illiberal philosophy than thoseof religious control freak cult leaders like Sunny Moon and L Ron Hubbard so I wantto make it clear such people are nothing to do with the political philosophy I follow.Speaking personally, though I was a Liberal throughout the years I was runningaround with my libido in the driving seat, chasing anything with a skirt apart from
 
Hovercraft ( a phase which lasted for some considerable time after my marriage) Ihave always found it more fun to sleep with Conservatives or simply disinterestedsthan with women who had a commitment to Labour or Liberal politics. Why shouldthat be? I think the answer is simple. Conservatism is about self – reliance, takingresponsibility for one's own problems. The left seem determined to believe we are allresponsible for everybody's problems.The further to the left people are the more they are influenced by that touchy – feely, quasi – hippy collectivist psychobabble. Thus with a Conservative supportingfemale a shag is a shag, foreplay is a bonus; live for the moment is their attitude andif the moment lasts longer than a moment or is revisited in quick time so much the better. I recall one lover, Carol (the wife of a wealthy buinessman) not just for her looks and enthusiasm but for her sense of style. Most of our assignations were in"service flats" or else involved booking into cheap hotels but only staying for twohours. We did however get away for one full night together, to see a show in London.The morning after our night at the theatre we checked out of the hotel havingskipped both sleep and breakfast. It was through fear of being seen that we bypassedthe restaurant; Carol thought because our love affair was so transitory the railwaystation was the only place it would seem right to eat, as if we were lovers in a Frenchfilm.For me, crossants, coffee and French ciggies in Euston Station with a beautifulwoman ten years my senior seemed a perfect way to end the only full night we wouldspend together.Another older lady, Linda, (she was thirty four, I was nineteen - commonplacenow but scandalous forty three years ago) was a freelance fabric designer and a proto- goth, the type one would expect to be quite left wing, especially someone whowould bleach a strand of her black dyed hair and colour it magenta or blue with fabricdye. It wasn't just the style, the eye makeup, the pale pancake and the crimson lippy Iloved, I loved Linda (still do a bit).We often stayed out all night, going to a jazz club that served drinks until late and

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