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Educational Notes: EN1Assertiveness, Communication & Organisation Essentials
 
The Genius CollaborativeAuthor of This Document: Ray Murray Direct email: iseb.global@yahoo.com
 
Document Type:
Notes for Educators / Facilitators / Mentors / Trainers:
Document Number
: # EN1
AssertivenessCommunication &Organisation Essentials
The Genius Collaborative Library
Educational Materials & Other Useful Documents 
 
Educational Notes: EN1Assertiveness, Communication & Organisation Essentials
 
The Genius CollaborativeAuthor of This Document: Ray Murray Direct email: iseb.global@yahoo.com
Assertiveness:
People often confuse being
Assertive
, which is a positive thing, with being
Aggressive
or
Bossy
or
Manipulative
which are negative things.In the British Culture, and in many other cultures around the world, over the centuries it has becomenormal to replace Being Honest with Being Polite. These are not the same things.Being Assertive is essentially the same thing as Being Honest.Being Assertive simply consists of:
“Saying what needs to be said, how and when it needs to be said”
“Doing what needs to be done, how and when it needs to be done”This is extremely straightforward. However people can often struggle with the “How” part of sayingor doing whatever it is that needs to be said or done.HOW you say or do something can produce a negative effect in the situation or for the person on thereceiving end of your words or actions, whether or not you meant for a negative result to happen.Assuming that you meant for a positive result to happen, as a result of saying what needed to besaid or doing what needed to be done, but you find that a negative result was what actually cameabout, then it is possible that you may need to improve your
Communication Skills
.On the other hand, simply because people are people, you could actually say or do something in themost appropriate way humanly possible, and still find that the person who is on the receiving end ofyour words or actions has a negative experience.In the latter situation, when the words or actions simply could not have been presented any better,the fact is that it is the RECIPIENT of your words or actions who lacks certain Communication Skills.Usually this kind of thing happens, for example, when the person does not have well developedListening Skills or Comprehension Skills.Unless part of your work is to heal or otherwise help that person improve their Listening Skills orComprehension Skills, then how they receive your skilfully presented words, or respond to yourskilfully conducted actions is their responsibility, not yours. (So don’t beat yourself up).However, if the truth is that you actually could have said what needed to be said, or you could havedone what needed to be done, in a more positive and more skilful way, then as a Positive Memberof any team or community, you would do everyone a great service ~ yourself included ~ if youimprove your Communication Skills.
 
Educational Notes: EN1Assertiveness, Communication & Organisation Essentials
 
The Genius CollaborativeAuthor of This Document: Ray Murray Direct email: iseb.global@yahoo.com
Communication Skills:
 
There are basically two ways of Communicating which Human Beings can employ – these areRelatively Creative or Relatively Destructive ways of communicating with one another.Some educators would perhaps say that there is a third way of Communicating with one anotherwhich we can, theoretically, employ ~ and this is communicating in a Relatively Neutral way ~ but inreality, rather than in theory, we human beings tend to communicate with one another in ways thatare Relatively Creative or Relatively Destructive.Between these two extremes of Creative Communication and Destructive Communication, we areessentially limited to five different types of communication, which is to say that we can communicatewhatever we want to communicate with on another via:
Creative Communication:1. Conversations2. Discussions3. Debates4. Arguments5. FightsDestructive Communication:
Now, as an Educator / Facilitator / Mentor / Coach or Trainer you may wish to explain the above alittle further, by showing what each of the different methods of communicating generally look like.Let’s start with “Debates”.
Debates:
For example, perhaps by using a pen on a drawing pad, flip-chart or whiteboard etc., if you start withDebates, then a Debate looks like something this:A Debate has movement to it. There are interactions between different participants, usually withdifferent views, who are normally expressing Different Opinions – but the thing doesn’t really goanywhere. The people talking or otherwise communicating (maybe via email, for example) are nothaving a conversation that gets some place, they are really just going around and around, generallygetting nowhere.This is the closest thing we humans can do to engage in Relatively Neutral Communication with oneanother – which is a polite way of saying that such Debates are usually pretty pointless exercises.
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