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"Jeff Contompasis," by Nan Reiner

"Jeff Contompasis," by Nan Reiner

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Published by Pat Myers
A parody of "That's Entertainment," presented to the Style Invitational Loser of the Year at the 2011 Flushies awards.
A parody of "That's Entertainment," presented to the Style Invitational Loser of the Year at the 2011 Flushies awards.

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Published by: Pat Myers on May 09, 2013
Copyright:Attribution Non-commercial

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07/22/2014

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JEFF CONTOMPASIS!
(to the tune of 
“That‟s Entertainment!”)
 By Nan Reiner - 2011
 For the tune, start at 0:30 of this cliphttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ud1zKcAgD0 
[Intro]
 Who‟s the one w 
ho parses the
 Vite every single week?He can make us laugh; he can make us groan.
Loserdom‟s fav‟
rite Uber-g
eek…
 The nerd
 
 who‟ll dissect every word
  With intent
scatological bent,Spouting math
like a true psychopath:Jeff Contompasis!The pest
tweaking every contest With the tools
to exploit all the rulesNames a horse
with a spreadsheet, of course:Jeff Contompasis!
 We knew there‟d be few as devoted as he
,
 Who‟d write for the „Vite quite so passionately 
.Or is it just OCD?
 You could say he‟
s obsessive, emotionally regressive. A squire
penning biting satireOr buffoon
 
spewing stuff that‟s jejune
,
He‟s a
hit
with his rapier wit:
The Loser who‟ll pass
 
some sweet laughing gasis Contompa----sis!The swain
with the off-color brain Won his town
the obscenity crown.
He‟s not
 weird
 
he‟s just
 been engineered:Jeff Contompasis!

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