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It Just is What It is - Dark Night of the Soul

It Just is What It is - Dark Night of the Soul

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Published by Theresa-Ann
2013-05-01 1st journal, Mayan day 5 Chuen/Monkey

Adyashanti – The Simplest Thing 1:55:49

Video Journal http://youtu.be/3HluAyR_yhk


Intro:
Well, here we go, again – back down into change. It was nice – a sort of pleasant coasting for a while – well, more or less. Anyway, I feel a bit off balance – again? What is again? In the only Now that is, how can there be “again?” Hmm.

Okay, whatever. What is just is, and that's a great place to start. Resisting what is does nothing worthwhile, so I consciously welcome it – whatever “it” is. Been feeling kinda down. No real reason, just down. Not sad, exactly – more like burdened...
2013-05-01 1st journal, Mayan day 5 Chuen/Monkey

Adyashanti – The Simplest Thing 1:55:49

Video Journal http://youtu.be/3HluAyR_yhk


Intro:
Well, here we go, again – back down into change. It was nice – a sort of pleasant coasting for a while – well, more or less. Anyway, I feel a bit off balance – again? What is again? In the only Now that is, how can there be “again?” Hmm.

Okay, whatever. What is just is, and that's a great place to start. Resisting what is does nothing worthwhile, so I consciously welcome it – whatever “it” is. Been feeling kinda down. No real reason, just down. Not sad, exactly – more like burdened...

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Published by: Theresa-Ann on May 11, 2013
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2235, Wednesday, 2013-05-01 1
st
,Mayan day 5 Chuen/Monkey
It Just Is What It Is –Dark Night of the Soul 
Intro:
Well, here we go, again – back down into change. It was nice – asort of pleasant coasting for a while – well, more or less. Anyway,I feel a bit off balance – again? What is again? In the only Nowthat is, how can there be “again?” Hmm.Okay, whatever. What is just is, and that's a great place to start.Resisting what is does nothing worthwhile, so I consciouslywelcome it – whatever “it” is. Been feeling kinda down. No realreason, just down. Not sad, exactly – more like burdened. This is the price we pay for being open. Since open takes in boththe supposed bad and the good, it's important not to be toogoodie-goodie with it. Heart doesn't do that, but mind surely can.Guess I still have some beliefs – heck, we all do – and one of themis that life is ultimately merciful – even good. But by observingone can catch the self, the false self, trying to make an ego of that– to make it into a sort of personality.So the same exact words can be said – about life being beautiful ormerciful – and from one mouth be true and another mouth, false.Amazing, how that works. In a flash, when we're not aware, notwatching or centered or whatever – ego or mind takes over.It's all so tempting to mind, all the possibilities for weaving an
 
identity – especially in this particular time or cycle – where for allof those willing, those courageous ones, ego, or the false self, isbasically dying.Well, it doesn't want to do that. It wants to continue – it's notdumb or stupid. And since it's been in charge, running the showfor so long – well, it's quite gotten used to things going that way.Add up the lifetimes, the times we came into amgodiment – to bethe god that I Am, that each one is – where the mind took thewhole thing over. You won't like the number you get.So, what to do? Well, nothing that much we've been told. Thisthing of sorting identity out – of doing that FIRST – is supremelyimportant. Well, at least it's worthwhile. Else whatever solutionswe come up with, one day we'll discover they're just mind candy –mind-created – nothing real. So we'll just have to start over –again.Be very still. Hey, I'm talking to myself, here – I'm by no meanspreaching. I'm just living my path out loud – don't ask me why.I'm sure I don't know. Nor do I care right now. It's just what I do.So anyway, be very still. I think that's a huge, as in major secret,here – and it's the last darn thing any mind wants to have you do.Oh no ANYthing but that! Poor mind. But oh, well.We've got this much invested in it – we've traversed that manydiverse and various paths, and we know where
they've
led – someof them hundreds of times, LOL. It's just got to end – to close – tocomplete itself! Does anyone out there agree?Okay, so what's next? Now, notice how that's a
mind
question,first of all* – yes, my mind. I still have one. And lately it's goingthrough its second childhood or something else – becoming a pain.It won't be still. Oh, semi-still, sure – but
really 
still – the kindthat's called for – oh, no! No way.So here I am. Just looking at that.It's all so bizarre. I'm pretty sure that what's going on, here, is yetanother level or layer of “die before you die” - of the Dark Night of the Soul, the walk through the valley of death. But oh well – it justis what it is.Nothing, but nothing, is like we thought it would be. Well, except
 
the one or two little things that are. But basically, everything isboth at sixes and sevens, upside down, inside out, and sideways –mostly backwards – perfectly opposite to what anyone would haveor could have expected. You don't hear many gurus or teachers talk about this side of things. Adyashanti is one of the precious exceptions. I'm linkingyou over to his 2008 lecture The Simplest Thing – it's trulyprecious. You may even cry. You'll just as likely laugh. It's so verygritty – so very real – the way it is. There's a grim comfort in that – the comfort of knowing how veryNOT alone you are. At times it feels very nice. At other times it just takes a bit of the edge off. At any rate, I find it helpful thesedays. Can't seem to get enough of him. But then, just wait, andsoon I'll be past this – whatever it is – and not have anymoreinterest in him. Go figure. Life is so darn crazy.Well, that can be accepted, too. It's not so bad, really, this
acceptance
thing. After all, what we're accepting is just
what already is
. It's not like we really have much of a choice, anyway.For most of us, if we'll just stay in touch with the Heart center Ikeep talking about, we'll quickly tune in to those many otherlifetimes where we did all that non-accepting. They didn't workout so well – didn't get us where we thought, where we were so
sure
we were headed.So, why not try the acceptance thing? Why not let that puppy gothis time – the phony self, the ego-created mirage? Yeah, it hurtslike hell at times. It gets really depressing, too – until we pull theself up short. Then we see just who and what is depressed – andit's not us. It's that phony one. That's the one that's in the midst of having such a hard time, youknow.
The one who is dying
. It is dying so that the Real You canbe born. Are you up for that? Are you willing to keep just hangingin there? It takes grit and stamina. No one warned us about that –well, not many. Maybe Sri Nisargadatta did – I forget.So what really counts? It wouldn't hurt to spend some
attention
 on that – since that's what we're getting stripped down to, anyway– our basic core. What is well and truly important to you? It maybe not much, at this point – depends on how far down the valley of the shadow of death you've traveled.

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