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Soldier of A Lost Cross

Soldier of A Lost Cross

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Published by Patricia Backora
"Ministers of the Gospel" prey on young people who haven't yet fully learned to hear the warning voice of the Lord. These wolves in sheep's clothing live a lie and dishonor the Lord even while they profess to be His servants.
"Ministers of the Gospel" prey on young people who haven't yet fully learned to hear the warning voice of the Lord. These wolves in sheep's clothing live a lie and dishonor the Lord even while they profess to be His servants.

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Published by: Patricia Backora on May 28, 2013
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09/21/2013

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Soldier of a Lost Cross
By Patricia BackoraAll names have been changed in this autobiographical story.Throughout the years I have observed that some of the Lord’s nine gifts of the Spirit have been neglected in the churches. Perhaps a general neglect of the Gift of Discerning of Spirits (I Cor. 12:10) has resulted from all the badpress which has resulted from its misuse. People can get so obsessed they’llsee a demon jumping out of every bush. But church leaders only play intothe devil’s hands when they forbid the Holy Spirit to move in the Gifts as Hedeems necessary to protect the Body of Christ from very real dangers.As a young girl newly baptized in the Holy Spirit, I faced a real danger. Thedevil capitalized on the fact that I was very unworldly-wise and ignorant of the wiles of men because I’d never dated. Aglow with the joy of the Lord, Iwas way too quick to trust everyone who professed to follow Christ. I hadnot yet learned to discern a sheep from a wolf.Before my Baptism, I attended "Gospel Garrison" services with a friend of mine. That church didn’t believe in the "second blessing", or Baptism of theHoly Ghost, accompanied by speaking in tongues. I joined the "SoldierSongsters", a little group which sang to folks at nursing homes and a localhospital to cheer them up. "Sergeant Ben Beulah", clad in his crisp reduniform would sing: "Stand up, stand up for Jesus, ye soldiers of the Cross,Lift up His royal banner, it must not suffer loss!" He would briefly pray forthe people, then shake hands with them and ask how they were.Afterward our little group (mostly female) would go out for burgers andfries. We would usually take our food back to the church premises so wecould all enjoy a nice long chat. At first, nothing roused the slightestsuspicion.It wasn’t long before I met "Joan and Lottie", two girls who went out withour group one night. They turned out to be the link which enabled me tolearn about and receive the Baptism of the Holy Ghost. Curious about aremark some kid made about their speaking in tongues, I asked Joan andLottie to take me to visit their church. The Holy Spirit filled me with aheavenly joy and love such as I had never known in my life. I ended updividing my time between the Gospel Garrison and "Deeper Life Church".Soon I only went out to sing with the Soldier Songsters, and attendedDeeper Life Church exclusively. Brother Beulah thought they’d stolen meaway from his own church.
 
Back then I thought only pure-hearted people wanted to preach the gospeland cheer up sick and shut-in folks. At the time, the Gift of Discerning of Spirits was not operative in my life. At first, Brother Beulah enjoyedchatting with all of us over the hamburgers. But soon he wanted to talk onlyto me, while the others talked among themselves. He made me promise tokeep everything we discussed CONFIDENTIAL. He knew I didn’t yet realizethat confidentiality has no place in a gospel minister’s conversations with ayoung girl. If I felt the slightest suspicion about his behavior it wasn’t strongenough yet. I think the devil was playing a perverse little game to see howmany clues he could leave behind and still dupe me about Sgt. Beulah for aslong as possible.Although I tried to steer Brother Beulah toward decent topics, he wasfascinated by racy Bible stories, such as David and Bathsheba and Abrahamand Hagar. One night he talked about 1920’s ladies’ lingeree. Maybe it wasbecause they didn’t have TV when he was a kid, but he told me what aswinging place his barn was for his pet cats. God must have wondered why Ididn’t wake up and smell the coffee. If only I’d had enough sanctifiedcommon sense to realize that only satan operates in so-calledconfidentiality, which is really darkness, and such a cloak of secrecy isnecessary to hide his evil works among children and inexperienced youngpeople. Jesus Himself took a dim view of concealing your works under coverof darkness.John 3:19-20 says: And this is the condemnation, that light is come into theworld, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds wereevil. For every one that doeth evil hateth the light, neither cometh to thelight, lest his deeds should be reproved. In the margin of my Bible, thatword "reproved" means "discovered."I should have wondered why Brother Beulah was too ashamed for all theworld to hear about the torture cats suffer when they copulate. Truly I foundthe discussion embarrassing, since I was just a soft-spoken, deeply religiousyoung girl ignorant of the wiles of men.At least we had clearly defined boundaries at my own church, where itconcerned acceptable conversation between older brothers and youngersisters in the Lord. Unrelated brothers and sisters greeted one another onlywith a handshake. That seems a bit stuffy by today’s standards, but the linehas to be drawn somewhere.Brother Beulah resorted to flattery."You’re such a lovely person. You’ve justgot a way about you that draws folks to you. I think of you as my own
 
daughter. I’d like to just kiss you on the forehead like a daughter.” With atwinkle in his beady black eyes he said: "If I were a young man again, I’dmarry you." I thought he was just joking. After all, he was three times myage. It was a good thing his wife couldn’t hear him. That’s a sure sign of the decadence of the end times. A man doesn’t know how to grow oldgracefully and with dignity, any more than a woman does. So he chasesevery pretty girl he sees and puts a spiritual spin on his sin.If he was attracted to the joy of the Lord I exuded, that wasn’t my naturalside showing. Before my Baptism in the Spirit, I was as cynical as awounded war veteran. I’d thought life on earth was just a sick joke. Thatwas a legacy of the damnable time I served at Hog Pen High. The HolyGhost gave me every positive thing in my life, including the ability to loveothers, not just tolerate them. But Brother Beulah was too blind to see thatmy good points were just the life of Jesus shining through. Maybe at thetime I didn’t fully realize that myself, being a babe in Christ. After all the**** that was heaped on me at that garbage dump school, hearing kindcomments was soothing to my wounded soul. But Brother Beulah wantedmore than light chitchat.I did tell Brother Beulah about my Baptism in the Spirit, but he denied thatthere was any such thing as the Second Blessing. He had to be faithful tothe teachings of his denomination. I know now that I should have realizedhow serious it is for other Christians to be so fearful of religious authoritiesthat they don’t desire the supernatural works of the Holy Spirit in theirchurch. All they might give Him permission to do is convict people of sin...quietly and discreetly in the privacy of their own hearts. But whateverhappens on the outside must remain strictly under the control of man. Ionce thought that any other churchgoer’s opinion was equally valid, nomatter what it was about. But democracy has no voice in the Most HolyPlace of God’s Presence. It’s just not the same as respecting someone else’sopinion on choir robes or stained glass windows. The Holy Spirit mustabsolutely be reverenced. I believe in democracy, fair play and listening toyour own sanctified conscience. On peripheral issues we can all agree todisagree and still have fellowship one with another. But on issues crucial tosalvation we must agree with the plain teaching of God’s Word, in order tomaintain true unity instead of trying to “build bridges withthe world’sviewpoint on sin. Lots of Christians think the Baptism is an optionalaccessory you can get by without, but I now firmly believe that being filledwith the Spirit IS an issue crucial to salvation. It is a Biblical commandment(Eph. 5:18-19). If you know the Holy Spirit Baptism is a real experience butstill deride it as being a doctrine of the devil, you’re in deep water with theLord (Mark 3:28-29). God’s Holy Spirit and His power is one of the linchpinswhich holds our whole salvation experience together. We can’t do that by

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