Forgiveness does not generally materialize on its own. You need to make a consciousdecision and a commitment to forgive. Nor does forgiveness happen in a flash or in a moment of insight. It’s a gradual processthat takes time.
Forgiveness is good for
As long as you hold on to a grudge you keep yourself attached, in an unhealthy way, to the person who hurt you. Forgiveness can help you letgo of that unhealthy attachment.Forgiveness is better for your physical health as well. It
stresses you. Recent researchhas shown physiological changes in the brain when you adopt an attitude of forgiveness.Studies have also found that forgiveness can help lower blood pressure, reducedepression and anxiety, increase self-esteem, and even save marriages.When you decide to forgive and start taking active steps, you may notice a bit of relief within a couple of days. Of course, the whole process will take time and effort, but at thisearly stage you won’t feel like so much like a prisoner of your own resentment.
Isn’t forgiveness just condoning the other person’s despicable actions?
Forgiving someone does not imply that what they did was acceptable, nor that you shouldwork toward reconciling the relationship. And if they continue with their hurtful behavior, forgiveness is not even appropriate.But if the incident was in the past, you can choose to work on letting go of the bitternessthat drains you of energy and robs you of present-day joy.
Wallin – Forgiveness - Page 2 of 5