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Anita Charlot's take on Steve Harvey's Act Like A Lady...Think Like A Man

Anita Charlot's take on Steve Harvey's Act Like A Lady...Think Like A Man

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Published by Anita Charlot
A review of Steve Harvey's book, Act Like A Like A Lady, Think Like A Man from a bisexual point of view.
A review of Steve Harvey's book, Act Like A Like A Lady, Think Like A Man from a bisexual point of view.

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Published by: Anita Charlot on May 06, 2009
Copyright:Traditional Copyright: All rights reserved

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05/11/2014

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Steve Harvey’s Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man … Even Touched The Spirit of ABisexual Woman.Steve Harvey’s book, Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man…has truly made a differencein my life. Being a woman that has experienced dating from both sides of the fence, Ifound his book to be most insightful.You see, due to my dating/marriage experiences with men…I decided to take a break.And just like that…I decided to date women. My friends, family member thought that Iwas going through a phase. My mother was about to travel over 700 miles to have her and her prayer warriors lay hands on me to exorcise the demon that had crossed my path…apparently I had been “possessed.”What I had been was totally disgusted in my choices of men. I had become very good at being the woman that would receive phone calls when they needed support, a nurturingvoice or a good “piece of cookie” but I had not yet found the man that would make myheart skip a beat.I had put up with substandard behavior, placed in situations where I was taking care of the man financially and I promised that I was tired of it. I honestly couldn’t tell thedifference between what I should expect and whether or not a woman with a child hadany rights to have any other expectation other than “being tolerated.” So I decided tochange the scenery.I spent over 11 years exclusively dating women…of all shapes, colors and sizes and whatdid my journey lead me to? It led me to getting in touch with my Purrfectly Authenticself. I have dealt with more emotional baggage through my tenure of walking on theother side than most people would voluntarily deal with in a lifetime. While I loved thewomen I had long term relationships with…there was always something missing. I wassearching for something that I just couldn’t find. And to be certain I didn’t give up beforefinding “the one” I devoted 11+ years on my search for love.I have journeyed to the depth of my soul to ultimately reach a point where I understoodthat running from something because it wasn’t what I thought it should be was only postponing me really learning all that I could about life, love and the pursuit of living lifeaccording to my truth. If other women had it…then there was a possibility for me aswell.Steve Harvey wasn’t the first man to give me a sense of what expectations I was entitledto have/should expect to have of my man as a woman. T. D. Jakes – The Lady, Her Lover and Her Lord, Christian Carter – How to Catch Him and Keep Him, HarvilleHendrichs – Receiving Love, David Deida – The Way of The Superior Man – and other men from my life experience had also paved the way.They pointed out that not only was it possible for me to have what my spirit longed for… but even once presented with it…I wasn’t able/ready to receive love - from men or 
 
women…period. They taught me how to look at a spiritual relationship from the male point of view. They even mimicked my thoughts from my book  The 5 Phases of Dating  with regards to waiting to be physical…but they didn’t hit it from a “straight up brotha point of view” as Steve Harvey did.Even with ALL of that, it was Steve Harvey’s “straight to the point” discussion of thedifference between men and women, the games men play to throw a woman off her guard, his openness to share his life experience and his ability to keep it humorous wasexactly what I needed and HOW I needed to hear it. His words leaped off the pages asthough it was my father or my brother talking to me; both of which are deceased. It wasas though he was talking to me. Since my coaching style is “straight to the point” froman actual position of having “lived” what I specialize in…his way resonated with mytruth.Struggling with receiving love, loving a person for how they touched my heart, made mefeel safe, treated me like a true woman (something I had not experienced fully) left mewith a void. Even after I met a wonderful man who appeared to walk on water…I wasn’tsure what to do; how to handle it. For the first time I was able to be completely myself… bisexual and all and it didn’t matter to him.As we began to approach a year of dating, the insecurities set in. Could I trust him? If I put expectations on him...will I lose him? Should I now just be happy that he was willingto date me even with my time spent dating women and the fact that I had two childrenand keep my mouth shut? HELL NAW!!! Steve helped me see that it wasn’t about being“put up with” it was about dating a REAL MAN and then telling me exactly what thatshould look like.I saw him as the “Superior Man” David Deida speaks of in his book “The Way of theSuperior Man.” I shared that as well as other things with him and even though I felt that Icould trust him, I still didn’t know how to behave, what to expect or how to take twosteps back and allow a man to be a man.Steve Harvey put a light on for me. He told me, ME… that it was ok to be a strongwoman and still be a woman to my man. He told me how to talk to my man. He told mehow to put what I wanted out there without having to be so crass, abrupt and rude. Heshared with me how men truly think. Christian Carter did the same thing for me;however, while Christian’s writings were enough to open the door for my new way of thinking…it was Steve’s book that applied it to the realities of my life.While I am still trying to find my way, learn all that I can about the woman that I am stillto become. The little girl in me delights in the fact that I CAN. I SHOULD. And I NOWKNOW what to expect from a man based on the truth of who he is. I’ve spent the later  part of my life leading people, mostly women to their truth while at the same time hiding behind the disappointment of not being completely in touch with my own.At times I felt like a hypocrite feeling that it was my destiny to lead other people to their 

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