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Do Not Point Fingers at Others

Do Not Point Fingers at Others

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By B.S. Hansra
By B.S. Hansra

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Published by: Divine Wisdom, Nanaksar Gursagar on Jul 07, 2013
Copyright:Attribution Non-commercial


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It is easy to find faults in others, but it is very difficult to go through the samechallenges and perform the same tasks ourselves. We have no problems seeingflaws in others, but the majority of the time; we fail to acknowledge our ownshortcomings. In reality, we cover up our own mistakes and weaknesses to helpourselves feel better through taking extensive measures to conceal our dark partswhile highlighting only our good points.Although it is difficult to do, yet we should strive to ensure we do not over-estimate our own virtues while at the same time, intentionally amplifying the flawsof others. It is easy to pick faults in other people and this is because in reality, we doso in order to gain subconscious enjoyment from finding negative aspects in others.Based on this, the most enlightened people are those who accept their ownambiguity.Why must we cast judgment upon others? What good can come out of vilifying strangers, other than appeasing our own insecurities? We consider othersas being full of flaws, but through our own selfish measures, consider ourselves tobe flawless individuals. Instead, we should focus on the positive characteristics of others, and not on their negative traits. Guru Sahib says that one should receivevirtues while consciously pushing their vices aside.If we speak negatively about other people, it goes against our own spiritualway of living. The very purpose of religion is to control and improve oneself and not to criticize others. We should always speak nice of other people and find thegoodness in them which we can take away and make improvements in ourselves.Sri Guru Nanak Dev Ji says: (Ang 766)
Let us speak of goodness, wherever we go and sit; let us skim off the Ambrosial Nectar,and drink it in.
In fact, the pure soul sees all others as superior to himself. A person that isfull of ego has a tendency to criticize others while the person with a pure mindnever sees faults in others. Only a person that considers himself as superior toothers sees faults in others and not in himself. Such a person tries to hide goodqualities of the other person and hide his own bad qualities.Sri Guru Arjan Dev Ji says: (Ang 186)
Do not say that anyone is good or bad. Renounce your arrogant pride, and grasp theFeet of the Lord.
It is our weakness to criticize others, while we do not make any attempt toimprove ourselves. We should try to correct ourselves instead of criticizing others.We try to ignore our weaknesses. In this way we are not true to ourselves. Weshould set an example for others to follow. We should behave to others as we expect others to behave towards us.Sheikh Fareed Ji says: (Ang 1378)
Fareed, if you have a keen understanding, then do not write black marks against anyone else. Look underneath your own collar instead.
Before criticizing others we should look in the mirror, as although we may becriticizing them, we may actually be indirectly chastising ourselves due to us havingthe same shortcomings. Do not point out a splinter in someone else’s eye when youhave a plank of wood contained within yours. In other words, how much of theunappealing behavior is that which we reject in ourselves and instead, find it easierto see the problems in others?Sri Guru Amardaas Ji says: (Ang 115)
This mind is a mirror; how rare are those who, as Gurmukh, see themselves in it.
When we have flaws in ourselves, we would seriously dislike it if someoneignored all of our positive points and just continued pointing out our ownshortcomings to us. This principle not only transcends the spiritual world, but alsoto the ego-driven world as well. We oftentimes judge others on being late or not showing up to religious events but in reality, how many functions do we attendourselves, and when we do attend these functions, how often do we attend thesefunctions for the right reasons in the first place? What about the many functions that we skip, or are too lazy to get out of bed for? The age-old saying will forever holdtrue, “Do onto others as you want to be done to you.” No matter what religion, orlack thereof, this phrase encompasses all.When tossing rocks from the so-called glass houses that we live in, we forget our own vulnerability and throw stones at other people in the form of criticism. Weshould be careful how we treat other people. How correct is the statement that acamel cannot see the crookedness of its own neck, but can see very far ahead of itself? This analogy is important to understand as it is about pointing out otherpersons’ sins and not seeing our own. It is about not changing the way we go about 
 our lives as we criticize others, while being guilty of the same or worse. We pick upon the faults of others, but remain blind to their good qualities.There are always weeds in a garden, but we shouldn’t forget to appreciatethe flowers but this is often not the case because we instantly become miserablelooking at the number of weeds and ignore all else. This means that we shouldappreciate the good points of others and not to dwell on their bad points. We shouldnot say insulting things to other people because they could easily do the same thingto us. Therefore, we should be careful how we behave, because in trying to harmothers we could bring trouble on ourselves. We should not gossip about otherpeople, if we have secrets of our own.We are more interested in finding faults rather than seeking out thegoodness in others. Whatever we see in others is only a reflection of our own self. If we accuse somebody of being bad, it is only because our feeling towards that personis bad. Whatever impression we have about others is a reflection of our feelingstowards them. Everything is just reflection. We do not have the right to find faults inothers, because our assessment of a person is solely limited to our experiences withhim. No one has the right to criticize others. There are so many other aspects of aperson’s personality that we do not know.Another analogy that will help us to realize how quickly our perception canbe flawed is through looking through a tint or a lens. When we put on red glasseseverything appears red and when we put on blue glasses everything appears blue.Only those people who fail to recognize this truth resort to criticism.Sri Guru Nanak Dev Ji says: (Ang 85)
We are good at talking, but our actions are bad. Mentally, we are impure and black,but outwardly, we appear white.
It is peculiar that we appoint judges on a daily basis, to decide the fate of others. Instead of deciding the fate of others, we should judge ourselves.Sri Guru Angad Dev Ji says: (Ang 148)
O Nanak, if someone judges himself, only then is he known as a real judge.
Whatever we tend to find in others, is actually just a reflection of our ownself. When proceeding through life, we must fulfill three different tenets. The first isthat we should try to do well to those who have done harm to us, and forget theharm altogether. Secondly, we must disregard the help that we have given to

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