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New Moon: Edward’s POVI hold no rights to anything. Based on “New Moon” by StephenieMeyerChapter 5: PretendAs we ran to Denali, all I could think of was Bella. Rememberinghow she used to cling to me when I ran with her on my back, justfor the pure enjoyment. Running would never be the same again.Feeling the warmth of her body against my back, feeling herbreath against my neck sending tingles all over my body, hearingher sweet giggles in my ear……… I hope we get there soonbecause any longer and I may not make it. I may collapse as I didtwo months ago in the unknown forest after……...I can’t eventhink the words. How am I going to be able to mask this painaround them? And….most importantly……how am I going toexplain this to Jasper? No matter how I may hide my feelings frommy family, Jasper will be able to feel this searing pain flowing likewaves of fire off of me. I would just have to have a talk with Jasperwhen I got to the house. Surely I would be able to confide in himto keep the details of my pain just between us. He didn’t likekeeping things from Alice, but once he feels my pain, he’llunderstand the need to keep it between us. Even secondhand,this kind of pain will definitely knock him back on his heels.Before we got there, though, I also knew that I had to preparemyself for everyone’s thoughts. Not only my immediate family, asif theirs weren’t enough, but also Tanya’s, Irina’s and Kate’s. Tanya’s especially. I haven’t been back here since I first met Bellaand I fled here to get away from her. Or her scent, rather. Ishould’ve just stayed here then. Maybe none of this would everhave happened. Of course, I still would have been thinking abouther. Even back then, before I even really knew Bella, when I wouldclose my eyes, all I would see was her face. But, unlike now, herface behind my lids always held a bewildered expression. Butnow, after I have had the chance to know that magnificentcreature, to earn her smiles and be rewarded with the look thatalways came into her eyes when she looked at me. The look of complete trust and devoted love, that vision of her bewilderedexpression disappeared and was replaced with a happier, lovelier
 
Bella. But even if I had never have come back to Forks, to easemy pride and my ego, if I’m being honest, I would have beenutterly content to live out the rest of my existence watching thatbewildered expression behind my lids, fighting the curiosity of hersilent mind. Any vision of Bella was to be treasured, adored.We were close to Tanya’s house. I started to slow down. Alicelooked at me and did the same. ‘
What is it, Edward?’ 
Alice askedwith her thoughts. I looked down and shook my head, “I can’tpromise you anything, Alice. I can’t promise that I’m going to stayhere with you guys.” I told her, suddenly regretting my decision tocome here in the first place. What was I thinking? This is not goingto work, being with them. I need to be alone. I deserve to bealone. I can’t be the Edward they need me to be. That Edwarddoesn’t exist anymore. Not without …….Bella. It hurts to eventhink her name.“I know that Edward. I already told you; just give it a try, to pleaseEsme. If you can’t stay with us, we all would understand that. We just want to try to help however we can. We can’t even imaginewhat you’re going through. We won’t object to anything youdecide to do,” she said.
‘It’s not like any objection on our part would work anyway, we objected to leaving Forks, and now look where we are.’ 
Alice thought, and I winced. She looked at me andthe expression on my face was like someone had just shot a knifethrough me. “Sorry. I haven’t had to think twice about what goesthrough my mind for a couple of months now. I’m sorry. I knowthat’s not making this better for you. I’ll try to watch mythoughts.” She said, apologetically.“That doesn’t mean it wasn’t true. You don’t have to apologize,Alice. I don’t think anything could make me feel any worse than Ialready feel about my decision.” My voice was expressionless,dead.“I’m supposed to be trying to make you feel better. I’m not doinga very good job.”“Don’t worry about it. It’s a worthless effort anyway.”
 
She started to say something else, but I cut her off with my hand.I didn’t want to hear anymore apologies. I just wanted to get thisover with so I could find somewhere to go alone to wallow.We walked through the double doors to the house and weregreeted by everyone. Everyone came one by one to hug me likethey do the mother of a deceased person at a funeral. Well, Iguess it did kind of fit the occasion. I felt like I had died all overagain anyway. But I don’t deserve anyone’s pity or sadness. Icould tell that they were all trying to control their thoughts aroundme. Well, not all of them. Only Rosalie, Emmett, Carlisle, andAlice. They were all thinking of random things. Rosalie wasthinking of her BMW, Emmett was reciting the rosters of everysports team he could think of, Carlisle was thinking about everydisease known to man, and Alice had started to recite the Catholicbible. Jasper and Esme, on the other hand, weren’t trying to hidetheir thoughts from me.
‘Edward!! I’m so glad you came. I was so worried about you. Are you okay? Well, no, I know you’re not okay. I’m just so glad you’reback. We’re going to help you through this son. You know I’mhere if you need me....whatever you need. ‘
Esme thought, as shehugged me again. Tight enough to cut off air flow, if I needed it.Which I don’t because I’m not human. I can never be human……..Ineed to get out of here. I can’t hold myself together. It’s only amatter of time before I breakdown again, and I don’t want to do itin front of Esme. But there was still one more thing I needed to dobefore I made my escape, but before I could even turn to facehim, his thoughts had already invaded my mind…
‘Whoa, Edward….I just….I don’t…I wish there was something Icould do……this is awful…….I’m so sorry…I never knew anyonecould feel this much pain. This much torture…Edward…..’ 
hecould’ve went on and on but I had to cut him off. I didn’t need himto reiterate what I was feeling.
I
was feeling them.“Uh, Jasper can I speak to you alone for a minute please?” I said,interrupting him. I just needed to get this over with.“Sure….” He said. He followed me out to the back garage. Unsureof what I would wanted to talk to him about. My brother and I
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Erik Poulsen

i love it. its the point of veiw that we all what to see it twilight. keep it up

reply05 / 11 / 2012
Bansari Dave

its goin awesome!!!! ur perfect keep it uuuuppppp

reply04 / 17 / 2012
Kimberly Taylor

perfect no complainits so awsome !

reply02 / 18 / 2012
Anna_Parker1990

The whole thing was REALLY good, but it was the last three lines that made me feel this person was really Edward. KEEP IT UP !!! xD

reply02 / 11 / 2012
Sonu Elizabeth

its so perfect!!!!!!!!

reply09 / 06 / 2011
Bhavna Nahata

its realy realy gud..plss write next chapt....plss pls

reply04 / 19 / 2011
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