Tale of a Lonely HeartOnce upon a time there lived a lovely, yet very lonely, broken-hearted littlegirl. She had green eyes that sparkled when she smiled and red hair to match herfeisty attitude. But the one thing that set her apart from all the other prettyfaces was her heart. You see for several years this girl was searching desperatelyfor one thing, or at least searching for proof of its existence. The one thing shehad always believed to be the greatest treasure of all. Love.From the day this girl was born she was taught that there is good in everyone,people just need love. Good eventually prevails and people always start out withthe best of intentions. She continued believing these beautiful fantasies untilher sixteenth year. The year was like a loss of innocence for her, like beingforce-fed the forbidden fruit. Almost like the wool was violently ripped from overher eyes.Gradually she began noticing that the skies were greyer than she remembered, andfriends were a little more secretive than before. Her life was slowly appearing tobe a lie. Frantically she reached out to grasp a hand to hold, only to discoverthat she was completely alone. Those closest to her were too busy, or had chose topursue earthly thrills and deceit, betraying her for temporary highs. All she hadwanted was love and acceptance. The vivid colors of her wonderful world meltedfrom her photographs and turned to dull black and grey.Instead of beauty, this frightened little girl saw only pain, hate, greed, lust,deception and suffering. Tears streamed steadily from her eyes and even from thecracks in her broken heart. Slowly the worlds' cast of evil began to seep into theeasily influenced girl's mind. Her hair grew more intense red with the pain sheendured each day; her sparkly green eyes darkened to conceal the mistrust and hurtshe had inside. However, the evil could not penetrate the little girl's heart, forher morals remained unaltered. No matter what misfortune came upon that lonelygirl she could not accept that something as pure, wonderful and yearned for aslove, was a lie. Not everyone had only hate, not everyone was only self-seeking,not everyone told only lies. There had to be other lonely hearts searching for thesame thing she was. Others, who know, no matter how bad the circumstances seemed,knew there was always hope. Someone who realized the self-medication only goes farenough to temporary numb, not heal, the pain inside. Someone who, like the teary-eyed, confused little girl, wanted to find unconditional love. The love that neverjudges, only accepts, is never self-seeking and rejoices in an others happiness.The girl remembered the story of Pandora and her box. What most people forgetabout this fable is, after all the pain and evil escaped from the box, there wasstill hope left at the bottom. Hope for a bright and multi-colored future. Hope tolove and be loved. Hope for her heart to mend and for the aching loneliness toslowly fade away.Some time later...Deep inside her shell, the lonely little girl with the once sparkly green eyes isstill hurting. Again and again she allows love to throw her heart back at her. Thestrand of hope she had once grasped so firmly is beginning to fray, and soon willbreak. It is becoming apparent that unconditional love, like all the otherchildhood fantasies, is also a lie. The broken-hearted girl thought to herself,"Whats the downside of death if living hurts this bad? Why does happiness seemwithin grasp, only to be unreachable in the end."The scared little girl's green eyes overflowed with tears. She thought in agony ofthe joy she once believed love would bring her. In turn it only made her feeldesperation and sadness. The little girl looked at the sky above her. Dark cloudswere forming soon the sky would also cry out its rain on the world. She whispereda prayer as a frantic last hope, "God please show me the answer, my missing piece.I now know I cannot do this on my own." The lonely little broken-hearted littlegirl is me. I'm still waiting on my answer.
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