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Living and Loving After Betrayal

Living and Loving After Betrayal

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Betrayal has many faces, including anger, abuse, deceit, and infidelity. These feel like betrayal because they violate the implicit promise of emotional bonds, that your loved one will care about your well being and never intentionally hurt you. If you’ve recently left a relationship where you felt betrayed by your partner, you may have difficulty moving on. In fact, it can seem impossible to view the world without the shadow of past betrayal hovering over you. As a result, you may struggle to create meaning in your life and build new, loving relationships.

In Living and Loving after Betrayal, therapist and relationship expert Steven Stosny offers effective tools for healing, based on his highly successful CompassionPower program. He founded the CompassionPower agency on the belief that we are more powerful when compassionate than when angry or aggressive, and that true strength comes from relating compassionately to others and remaining true to your deeper values. In this book, you’ll learn practical strategies for overcoming betrayal-induced trauma and the chronic resentment and depression that result, using this innovative compassion-empowerment approach.

Most books on betrayal only focus on the obvious issues, such as infidelity, abuse, or sex addiction. This book explores the effects of those kinds of betrayal, as well as less-talked-about types, such as emotional manipulation, dishonesty, deceit, and financial cheating. In addition, the book helps you regain a sense of trust in others so that you can eventually find another compassionate person to share your life with or, if you choose, to rebuild a relationship with your reformed betrayer.

Recovering from the betrayal of partner isn’t easy, but Living and Loving after Betrayal offers potent ways to heal, grow, and love again.
Betrayal has many faces, including anger, abuse, deceit, and infidelity. These feel like betrayal because they violate the implicit promise of emotional bonds, that your loved one will care about your well being and never intentionally hurt you. If you’ve recently left a relationship where you felt betrayed by your partner, you may have difficulty moving on. In fact, it can seem impossible to view the world without the shadow of past betrayal hovering over you. As a result, you may struggle to create meaning in your life and build new, loving relationships.

In Living and Loving after Betrayal, therapist and relationship expert Steven Stosny offers effective tools for healing, based on his highly successful CompassionPower program. He founded the CompassionPower agency on the belief that we are more powerful when compassionate than when angry or aggressive, and that true strength comes from relating compassionately to others and remaining true to your deeper values. In this book, you’ll learn practical strategies for overcoming betrayal-induced trauma and the chronic resentment and depression that result, using this innovative compassion-empowerment approach.

Most books on betrayal only focus on the obvious issues, such as infidelity, abuse, or sex addiction. This book explores the effects of those kinds of betrayal, as well as less-talked-about types, such as emotional manipulation, dishonesty, deceit, and financial cheating. In addition, the book helps you regain a sense of trust in others so that you can eventually find another compassionate person to share your life with or, if you choose, to rebuild a relationship with your reformed betrayer.

Recovering from the betrayal of partner isn’t easy, but Living and Loving after Betrayal offers potent ways to heal, grow, and love again.

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Published by: New Harbinger Publications on Sep 04, 2013
Copyright:Attribution Non-commercial

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08/06/2014

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Publisher’s Note
This publication is designed to provide accurate and authoritative information in regard to the subject matter covered. It is sold with the understanding that the publisher is not engaged inrendering psychological, financial, legal, or other professional services. If expert assistance or counseling is needed, the services of a competent professional should be sought.
Distributed in Canada by Raincoast BooksCopyright © 2013 by Steven Stosny New Harbinger Publications, Inc.5674 Shattuck AvenueOakland, CA 94609 www.newharbinger.comCover design by Amy Shoup Acquired by Melissa Kirk Edited by Susan LaCroix All Rights Reserved
Library of Congress Cataloging in Publication Data
Stosny, Steven.Living and loving after betrayal : how to heal from emotional abuse, deceit, infidel-ity, and chronic resentment / Steven Stosny, PhD.pages cmIncludes bibliographical references.ISBN 978-1-60882-752-7 (pbk. : alk. paper) -- ISBN 978-1-60882-753-4 (pdf e-book) -- ISBN 978-1-60882-754-1 (epub) 1. Trust. 2. Betrayal. 3. Intimac(Psychology) 4. Interpersonal conflict. 5. Interpersonal relations. 6. Couples--Psychology. I. Title.BF575.T7S76 2013158.2--dc232013011797 
 
Contents
 
Introduction
1
Part I
The Start of Healing and Empowerment
1
Footprints on the Heart and Soul
72
How to Use the Natural Motivation of Pain to Heal
193
How to Develop a Healing Identity 
294
How to Use Restorative Images to HealPainful Memories
45
Part II
Retraining the Recovering Heart
5
 The Key to Healing and Growth: Your Core Value
576
Getting to Core Value under Pressure: Your CoreValue Bank 
757
Intimate Betrayal and Post-Traumatic Stress
898
How to Change Hidden Guilt and Shame intoSelf-Compassion
1019
Overcoming Resentment and the Danger of Trust
113

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