Cultivate the Gratitude Attitude

"You simply will not be the same person two months from now after
consciously giving thanks each day for the abundance that exists in
your life. And you will have set in motion an ancient spiritual law:
the more you have and are grateful for, the more will be given
you."
-- Sarah Ban Breathnach ~ Simple Abundance

One of the quickest way to make the shift from being negative, resentful,
angry, victimized to being positive, compassionate, empowered, is through
gratitude. When you truly feel grateful for what you have in your life (and
I'm not referring to just the material things), it's almost impossible to dwell
on the negative feelings. In fact, scientists have found that feeling grateful
produces the feel-good chemicals in your brain, the same chemicals that
reduce stress, lesson pain and improve your immune functions. Being
grateful puts you in a totally different mindset and energy level, and
enables you to look at your life & current circumstances from a more
positive perspective. As a result, you will feel more in control and
empowered to take action and make both inner & outer changes in your life.

I'm sure you have had experiences in the past that you thought was THE
worst thing that could happen to you, and it turned out to be a blessing in
disguise. We all have experiences like that. In fact, all the negative or even
tragic experiences we had, served a purpose. As human beings, we are
meant to continuously grow and transcend ourselves. All the challenges we
have are there to stretch us and force us to learn and to grow. If we can see
this truth, and recognize all the blessings in disguise that we have all
experienced in the past, we will have this "inner knowing" that everything
will work out in the end, that the Universe is loving, even though we may or
may not see the "master plan" right now. And that "inner knowing" gives us
tremendous comfort and security, doesn't it?

If you can consciously focus your energy on gratitude, and actively look
for things/people to be grateful for, you will reap the benefits on multiple
levels:
• You will instantly feel calmer, more joyful, and centered
• According to the Law of Attraction, you will attract even more
abundance, joy and other things you'd be grateful for into your life
• You will take comfort in the inner knowing that "all is well" and
everything will work out in the end, despite your current challenges
and circumstances
So, how do you cultivate the gratitude attitude? Here are some action
exercises you can try:

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 • When you are in a negative, challenging situation, instead of trying to
run away & avoid the experience, make a conscious choice to be fully
present and look for the blessings, lessons and opportunities (to learn
& to grow).
• "Top Three Things" exercise: as you go through your day, make a
mental list of the 3 best things that happen to you today. When
something else better shows up, modify your list and keep track of the
top 3 things for the day. If you keep a journal, you might want to write
down your list at the end of the day, so you can refer back to your
journal in the future. Do this exercise for at least a week. This exercise
trains your mind to consciously and actively look for the blessings in
your life. Focus on finding "what's going right" instead of following our
tendency to focus on "what's going wrong". I'm sure you will find new
appreciation & outlook for your life.
Thanksgiving is coming up, and it's the perfect time to focus on gratitude.
Why not make a commitment to try out these action challenges, and see
how they can change your life.

Gratitude & Appreciation

Everyone enjoys being recognized and appreciated for the small things.
Taking the time to acknowledge and appreciate others sets you up to
experience even more positive experiences. Commit to incorporating one of
the following suggestions everyday.
Hi-tech suggestions:
Have you seen the TV commercial with the family sitting around the dinner
table text messaging each other? Looks silly and I am surprised at how
popular that activity is. My thought is, "why not just call?"
If you are into text messaging, why not send messages of gratitude and
appreciation. Catch someone in the act of doing something nice or helpful.
This is especially useful if you have kids and want to stay in touch with
them in a positive and uplifting way.
If you have an answering machine, most have a way to record a message.
Look for the memo button and record your message of appreciation for
someone to "discover" when he or she arrives home.
Low-tech suggestions:
Post a calendar on the refrigerator and commit to writing down daily what
you love, appreciate or admire about the people in your family. It is a fun
activity to get the whole family involved in.
Use post-it-notes and place "gratitude notes" where your loved one will find
it...on their pillow, in their wallet or purse, on the steering wheel, etc.

Attitude of Gratitude
by: Steve Gillman
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An attitude of gratitude? People often to think it will come from having some
great luck or fortune. Of course it could feel great to win the lottery, and
great friends, money, houses, travel - these are all good things, but not
enough by themselves. The right frame of mind is necessary to fully enjoy
life. You need the attitude of gratitude.
Gratitude 101
Your life is better when you feel blessed, when you can look around and say
"Thank you, God," or "Thank you universe." Whether or not you are
religious, when you see life as a wonderful gift, your experience is a richer
one. Imagine going through life like you're a child, and every morning is
Christmas.
Of course, it is easy to think that gratitude comes from having what we
want. We might imagine ourselves giving thanks if we had money, a loving
family, and maybe a house on the beach. But we know there are ungrateful,
unhappy people with these things. We also know that there are poor people
full of gratitude for what little they have, so where does this feeling come
from?
Creating Gratitude
An attitude of gratitude arises from how you look at things. It is the natural
feeling that comes when you recognize the real value of the people and
things in your life. Focus on the good and you cannot help but have a better
attitude and experience of life. Gratitude, then, is something you can
encourage, something you can learn.
The first step is to stop and smell the roses. How can you be thankful for
something you don't notice or enjoy? By the way, roses really do smell
great.
The second step is to make this appreciative approach to roses and life a
habit. You don't need to ignore the ugliness in the world. Just consciously
choose to see the good and beautiful things, until doing so becomes
automatic.
One way to encourage this habit is to start writing down every positive
thing that happens to you, and all the things you like. Continue this until
you start automatically seeing the good things in life. If you've ever bought
a white car, and started seeing white cars all over, you know how
awareness and focus can alter your perception of reality. In the same way,
once you are aware of the good, and start looking for it, you'll start to see
wonderful things all over.
Simple exercises like the one above train your mind with time. When you
are in the habit of "counting your blessings," gratitude, and a much richer
experience of life is the natural result. You will have an attitude of gratitude.

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Developing an Attitude of Gratitude
SUMMARY: Developing a “Gratitude Attitude” enables us to find the positive
in those situations we perceive as being negative, says self-help author.
“I’m thankful for the promotion I received at work.” “I am grateful for the
good health I enjoy.” “I am appreciative of the relationships that are part of
my life.”
Sit down at any table this Thanksgiving and chances are you will hear some
variation of the above statements. After all, it’s easy to recognize positive
outcomes and express our appreciation for them. But recognizing and
appreciating the good in those situations we perceive as negative is more
difficult, or at times, downright impossible.
That’s where a “Gratitude Attitude” comes into play, helping us focus on
what we gain from every occurrence in our life, says Nancy Christie, author
of The Gifts of Change (Beyond Words Publishing).
“The benefit of having a ‘Gratitude Attitude’ became very apparent to me
this past year, when my mother suffered a recurrence of the cancer that
had plagued her since 1999,” explains Christie. “For six years, we had taken
a positive approach, and expressed our thanks to God and the doctors each
time it looked like she had beaten the odds. But following her last surgery in
June, we all had to accept the fact that her condition was terminal. And to
be quite honest, the concept of thankfulness didn’t initially seem to be
relevant.”
But as she helped her parents cope during the last weeks of her mother’s
life — a time she described as both heartbreaking and healing — Christie
realized that there was still much to be grateful for. “Although it was very
difficult to help my mother through this final transition in her life, it also
gave me so many precious memories. Being able to provide some measure
of comfort to her — not just medically but by talking and caring for her
physical needs — comforted me as well. And although my Dad and I had
always been close, this time of shared grief truly enhanced our relationship
and made me realize anew how fortunate I am to have him as a father.”
That’s the whole point of developing a “Gratitude Attitude, she explains. “I
could have spent those last weeks condemning the medical profession for
failing to heal my mother or berating God for taking her from me. But that
would have kept me from making the most of the time I had with her, and in
the end, wouldn’t have changed the outcome. Instead, I tried to focus on
the positive experiences those weeks gave me, which ultimately helped me
deal with the loss.”
The Gifts of Change explores the idea of seeking out the good in all
situations. In the chapter entitled “The Hidden Advantage of Hindrances,”
Christie uses a quote from Elizabeth Kübler-Ross to illustrate the choice we
all have when confronted by difficult experiences.

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 “In Death Is of Vital Importance, Kübler-Ross wrote that tragedies are not
really tragedies unless we choose to make them so,” says Christie. “She
pointed out that we can also see them as opportunities for growth and
transition, as hints that our life needs to change.”
But adopting that approach isn’t easy, Christie admits. “When things don’t
have the outcome we desire, we all tend to be what my husband calls
‘members of the Whiny Family.’ We complain about it, we blame others for
it, we metaphorically kick the situation which only hurts us in the process.”
“It’s a real test of one’s ability to uncover the positive in the face of
adversity,” she notes. “We tend to dismiss that approach as ‘Pollyanna-ish’
but it’s really an empowering attitude. What we are saying in effect is that,
while things may not be going the way we planned or hoped, we still have
control over our responses and the ability to make even a bad situation
work for us. A ‘Gratitude Attitude’ keeps us from wasting our mental and
emotional energies fighting against what can’t be changed, and instead,
encourages us to mine the situation for ‘hidden gold’ that enrich our lives.”

5 WAYS TO CULTIVATE AN ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE

by Susie Michelle Cortright
Gratitude keeps us centered and wards off jealousy and negativity.
Here are five little things we can do each day to nourish our sense of
gratitude:

1. Choose your friends wisely. If you strive to be spiritually strong,

supportive, empowering, intelligent, energetic, and positive, seek those
characteristics in others.

Help your friends develop more positive traits by living those positive traits
yourself. Know what kind of friends will help you nurture your soul, and set
out to find some.

2. Help your friends cultivate gratitude. Before you say anything about a
friend's situation, remember that everyone's situation is unique. I've seen it
happen to myself and to my friends. They'll be perfectly happy until
someone tells them they're being mistreated. Suddenly, they're upset.

Don't let your friends wield such power, and work to avoid wielding such
power yourself.

Day by day, hour by hour, make a goal to stop complaining about your life.
Make a pact with your friends to cut the complaints from your
conversations.

3. Give the gift of gratitude to your children. Help your children to be

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satisfied with the simple things while giving them the innate power and
ability to achieve whatever they want in life...by living in such a way
yourself.

4. Say "Thank You." Whom in your life do you appreciate? Let them know,
whether it's your mom, your kids, your friends, your husband, your child's
daycare provider or the helpful woman behind the cosmetics counter.

A heartfelt "thank you" often does the trick. Make it a habit and your
attention will suddenly turn to all the things people do for you.

Also, write thank you notes regularly - not just after a gift exchange - and be
mindful of all the ways you show your appreciation by the things you do in
return.

Another idea: Spend 15 minutes writing a letter to your children. In this

note, tell them how much you love them, why you're thankful for them, and
all the ways they have enriched your life. This can be something you give
them now or after they have grown.

5. Be mindful of the little things. Today, strive to be aware of all the aspects
of your personal, professional, and family life for which you are thankful.

Take a few minutes today to appreciate nature. Go for a walk and notice
only those things that are beautiful. Whether you focus on the stars above,
a distant mountain range, or the cottonwood tree in your backyard, try to
notice the details. Give thanks for the beauty that surrounds us.

Oprah Winfrey and Sarah Ban Breathnach, author of Simple Abundance,

speak often of the importance of a Gratitude Journal, in which, at the end of
each day, you record at least five things you're grateful for.

Regardless of whether you write down these items, spend some time each
day to focus on the little things in your life that make each day special.
Perhaps it's your child's toothless grin. A warm home. Delicious food
enjoyed with family.

Together, let's work on focusing on what we have - not on what we don't

have - and all the ways we can help one another have more gratitude for
the gift of life.

Keeping an Attitude of Gratitude

by Louise Morganti Kaelin
When was the last time you stopped to acknowledge all the good things in
your life? Very often, when we're focused on a 'big' goal, or just caught up in
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day-to-day living, we often forget about the things that bring us joy. And
when we're feeling down, it's very hard to remember that they exist at all!
Yet there is a definite physiological response when we acknowledge our
gratitude. Try it now. Close your eyes and think of something (or someone)
you're grateful for. Notice how your breathing changes? How it slows down?
That you start smiling? And just feel better in general?
It is amazing to me how something so simple can change my perspective.
No matter what my attitude was when I started, I feel better. And the more
things I can acknowledge my gratitude for, the better I feel. Here's a simple
way to incorporate gratitude into your life on a regular basis.
1. Start your day off by remembering what you're grateful for. List
everything you can think of. As you continue with this exercise on a daily
basis, you'll notice that your list grows.
2. You can write these in a Gratitude Journal. Or, you can incorporate this
exercise into your morning routine. What do you do regularly in the morning
where your mind is free? Walk, shower, exercise, commute to work? Reap
double benefits from what you're already doing by making that your
'gratitude time'.
3. Starting your day with gratitude puts you in a pretty good mood. So,
when you get to work, begin with the hardest thing you have to do that day.
I suspect you'll find it much easier to accomplish.
'Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough,
and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to
clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a
friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and
creates a vision for tomorrow.' -- Melody Beattie
You Can Choose: Is Today Going to be a Good Day or Bad Day?
Every day you have a choice: Will it be a good day or a bad one?
It really IS up to you. You can't control the external circumstances of your
life -- the bad news, the interruptions, the unexpected problems, various
quandaries, etc. -- but you can control your response to them.
You can also plan your day for success and organize it for productivity. And
you can practice certain habits every day to ensure that, in the long run at
least, you will achieve wealth, health, and happiness.
Recently, I came across the following table. I don't remember who put it
together, but I thought it was a likable idea -- a menu of your daily "choices"
-- and thought you might like it too. I changed it considerably from the
original (which was too "New Age" for my taste).
Optimism: How to Avoid Negative Thinking
by Kali Munro
Have you ever wondered why some people feel down and defeated when
faced with difficult situations, while others feel challenged and hopeful? Or
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why some people get all worked up and angry over small inconveniences
and disagreements, while others respond more positively? These different
reactions are due to how people interpret events - whether they view things
from an optimistic or a pessimistic viewpoint.
While we can learn from both optimists and pessimists, most of us need
help being optimistic. This article explores both ways of thinking, and gives
some suggestions on how to become more optimistic.
The defining characteristic of pessimists is that they tend to believe bad
events will last a long time, undermine everything that they do, and are
their fault. Optimists, confronted with the same situations, believe that
defeat is a temporary setback, its causes are confined to that one situation,
and it's not their fault. While a pessimist may give up, an optimist will try
harder to change the situation.
Pros and Cons To Both Optimism and Pessimism
There are pros and cons to both optimism and pessimism. Extreme
optimism can be off-putting and invalidating because it seems phony and
can be a denial of reality and pain. Extreme pessimism can be depressing
because it seems to only focus on the negative and catastrophizes events.
A healthy dose of optimism can be uplifting and hopeful, while a healthy
dose of pessimism can be realistic and wise. Achieving a balance of being
realistic and hopeful can be a challenge.
Differences Between Optimists and Pessimists
There are many reasons why people become pessimistic, including child
trauma, losses, or highly critical parents - yet many optimists have also
experienced great hardships and traumas; Anne Frank is a good example.
The difference between optimists and pessimists isn't a difference in life
experiences, but rather in how people perceive and respond to adversity.
For example, an optimist who is going through a hard time assumes that life
will get better, while a pessimist believes life will always be difficult and
painful.
These different approaches to life impact on health. People who are
optimistic generally have better health, age well, and live more free of
many physical problems associated with aging. Fortunately, optimism can
be learned.
Ways To Be Optimistic
The first step to optimism is to identify the thoughts and beliefs running
through your mind after something unpleasant happens. How did you
interpret the event? Write out all of your beliefs and read them over. Then
separate your feelings from your beliefs, because you won't be challenging
your feelings; what you feel is what you feel.
Next, write down all your feelings about the event and how you responded.
Do this for a few unpleasant situations, such as an argument with your

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partner, a work conflict, and getting a parking ticket. You might begin to see
a pattern in how you interpret and react to events, and this will help you to
become aware of and to change patterns.
If you do have pessimistic thoughts, it can help just to be aware that you
think that way. Next time your thoughts jump to something like "I never get
my way," "Nothing ever gets any better," or "People are always mean to
me," try to notice that a pessimistic way of thinking is present for you.
The next step is to distract yourself from your pessimistic beliefs or dispute
them. Disputing pessimistic beliefs will bring deeper, longer lasting results
than distracting will, but distraction can also be effective, and sometimes
easier.
Disputing pessimistic beliefs involves replacing them with alternative,
kinder, and more realistic explanations. For example, if you have an
argument with your partner, you might immediately think: "S/he never
understands me! I'm always the one who ends up apologizing. This isn't
working out; we should split up." In the heat of an argument, it's hard to
think rationally. But if you step back and think about the situation more
realistically, you might find that your thoughts become more positive, and
you may even be able to work things out faster. For instance, you might tell
yourself, "We just had an argument, and while s/he wasn't very
understanding, neither was I. S/he's understood me lots of other times, and
will probably understand me again once we've both cooled off. We've
always been able to work through our problems before. I know we can
again."
Maintaining a hopeful, positive, yet real perspective in the face of adversity
can be a real challenge - one many are facing right now in the world - but it
is essential to living peacefully and happily. Just as it is important to
recognize what is unjust and unfair in our lives and the world, it is equally
important to see the beauty, love, generosity, and goodness as well. Being
gentle and loving with ourselves when we make mistakes, or when bad
things happen is key to being hopeful and optimistic. And even if you're not
sure it's possible, you can do it!

Focus On The Joy

By Kathy Gates, Professional Life Coach
It's the Holiday Season --A new year is just around the corner! I'll bet you're
already thinking about how you'd like next year to be a little different than
the last, right?
But instead of thinking of performance, and efficiency, and control, I'd like
you to take this opportunity to think about how many things in your daily
life that you do "just for the joy of it"?
What I'm talking about here is value-based happiness (as opposed to
temporary happiness).
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Value-based happiness refers to the general feeling of well being that you
experience when you are doing what you perceive to be meaningful --when
it's something that's important to you.
When you love what you do, you naturally become more efficient. When you
do things for the Joy of It, you'll rise above problems, and move easier
through life.
Value Based happiness is a by product from living a life Focused on the Joy.
It is the by product of doing things not for what you get in return, not
because you "should" or "have-to", but because you want to, because they
are a part of your highest goals, and what you value.
Value based happiness comes from looking at things with your heart, not
just your eyes.
You create value based happiness by Focusing on the Joy of life, instead of
constantly looking for the next new thing that might make you feel better
about yourself, about your life.
So how do you Focus on the Joy?
Throw out your ideas about control, effectiveness, and goals. (Yes, they are
important, but let's just try something different, ok?)
Instead ---
Focus On Learning. Instead of making a goal to achieve more in your job,
decide instead to read and learn how to do one new thing each week.
Focus on Time. Schedule your time to include what's important to you, like
reading time, or exercise time, or family time, or learning time.
Focus on the Why. Instead of just forcing yourself to mop the kitchen floor,
tap into the higher goal that mopping the kitchen floor supports (having a
clean and healthy home).
How does that feel? Not bad, huh! If you focus on the pleasure that a desire
gives you, you'll find it easier to put in the work that it takes. (One author
gives the example of giving blood - while the experience itself may be less
than pleasant, the joy comes in knowing *why* you're doing it).
And I absolutely guarantee that you will achieve more, maintain your
efforts, and have a much better journey along the way.
Over the next 12 months, instead of focusing on the effort, FOCUS ON THE
JOY. Focus on the people and things that are most important to you. Focus
on the pleasure you get out of moving towards your goals. Focus on the
process of creating something, not what results you expect.
Invest in yourself more than you ever thought was allowed. Not only will you
reap rewards, but those around you will benefit more than you ever
believed.
Negating the Inner Critic
by Derek Ayre
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The majority of clients who I deal with are suffering as a result of a severe
"inner critic". Symptoms can range from severe phobias to deep depression.
Teachers and parents formulate the inner critic in the mind of a young child.
It is not that these "authorities" are wrong in their teaching, because we
have all be subjected to these teachings that have its origins in the earliest
annals of society. In fact, it isn't until we can recognize that "right and
wrong" are value judgements that in many instances, has no credence in
reality, that we can move on.
Take the example of a child who in his early years witnesses a strange ritual
of getting rewarded for keeping his bed dry at night. He would be subjected
to statements such as "There's a good boy!" and "You'll be having some
sweets!" And then if on an odd occasion he has an accident, perhaps in a
public place, he is subjected to a scolding. In other words he is rejected and
has to "be good" in order to gain approval again.
As the child grows into an adult, the outer critic (the parental/teacher)
manifests as an inner critic - a stream of nagging thoughts (shouldism) that
in extreme cases of anxiety, goes on and on and on... For example, "If you
do such and such, something will happen.", "Because you did/said such and
such, boy are you for it now!"
Acceptance is what we all crave. Rejection, is what we all dread, regardless
of how we interpret the two words. But... Here lies the resolution. It's the
power of acceptance.
A Touch of Eastern Philosophy
Every thought, good or bad is part of us. If we can reach True understanding
and recognize that there is no "part", that we are "at-one", we will recognize
that when we try to reject an undesirable thought/feeling, we are trying to
reject ourselves.
Analogy
A good analogy here would be a glass full of water. What part of the water is
good or bad? If we try and get out the bad, we will throw away the good. If
we stir the bad (e.g. mud) at the bottom, it will contaminate the clear water.
Our bodies' are ninety per cent water, and our spirits move just like water
(fluid) and then there's the truth that there is no separation. Body, mind and
spirit are really one.
The Power of Acceptance.
To accept a person exactly the way he/she is, will mellow and transform that
person. To reject him/her will embitter and cause hatred that will be directed
to him/herself or others.
Rejection was something that was feared more than death by execution in
primitive societies. So perhaps now, it can be understood just how powerful
these two actions are.
Acceptance and Rejection: Clarification
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Care need to be taken here not to confuse acceptance with indulgence.
Acceptance means to acknowledge, observe and where appropriate
communicate - communication by writing or speaking can aid clarification.
But one must feel "safe" with the recipient of such a communication.
Indulgence means to react to/on the thoughts/impulses. This means to
either deny it and punish yourself for thinking such a thing, or give in to the
urges and impulses thus hurting self or others.
Acceptance is doing nothing. Just being. Being with the inner situation.
Observing it at deeper and deeper levels and gaining an insight into the
way that you got it constructed. And at some point during the process, you
will be able to "de-structure" it and a transformation will take place. It will
be replaced by a more positive attitude that you can choose.
Because, the inner critic is so ingrained in the subconscious mind,
acceptance takes practice, and sometimes needs the guidance of a
therapist. This is because paradox on top of paradox can occur in the
process and cause confusion.

Remembering Our Past as a Positive Gateway to Our Future

By Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein
Do you realize that your past experiences hold the key to a better future!
Each of us can learn to unlock the door to a better future by understanding
the promise that exists in our own unique memories.
Many times in life we struggle between hope and hopelessness. One place
to find hope is in the promise of your own past. No matter how difficult your
childhood may have been or how busy or anxious you felt, the jewel of your
own potential still showed through at times. Maybe it was what kept you
going.
Perhaps you loved dance class as a little girl or singing songs with grandma,
or cooking, or growing vegetables, or taking care of a pet. Maybe you had a
rock or coin collection that meant a lot to you. No matter how gummed up
your earlier days were, you lived them and within them was the promise of
your own potential.
Sometimes your potential may have shown through just because of
dysfunction or difficult times. For example, if your family was fighting you
had to find a way to escape. You may have connected with yourself by
climbing up into a tree house that you had built and decorated with your
own hands. Problems at home may have pushed you to study harder, or to
learn to do something better, so that you could spend more time with your
studies or your hobbies, and less time thinking about your problems.
If you can get back to your own sense of promise--then hope can reemerge
as you see ways of reinventing yourself. Of course, as we get older and
evolve, some dreams are gone forever in terms of being practical. For

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example, we may not be able to be a commercial airline pilot if we never
learned how to fly, or a conductor of an orchestra if we have not pursued
music theory.
Although we can't make all our own choices in life, we can make a lot of
them. We often decide where we will live, whom we will marry, how we will
live, how we will spend our leisure time, etc. Also, as we get older we have
more options to work out, a compromise between our dreams and what
might be a practical reality. We have more capacities to resolve a situation
and creatively find a way to bring forth one's promise from childhood into a
new form.
Is making a positive future easy? I wouldn't call it easy, but having a future
with meaning, hope and joy is obtainable. That's the beauty of your own
promise. It's obtainable if you are willing to be practical and very specific.
It is crucial to learn how to look back into your own past, to discover unique
enhanced states of well being. As you begin to recognize these positive
states of well being, i.e., THE ENCHANTED SELF, you can become a better
expert at understanding what made them heightened joyful times.
It may not be enough to remember a wonderful day that you spent at the
circus with your uncle. It's pleasant to recall but it may not teach you
enough in order to help you find your own promise. You have to be more
specific. Why did you like that day? Was it the weather conditions? Was it
the way you felt that day? Was it being with this particular uncle? Was it
something you saw at the circus that excited you? Was it something you
purchased? Was it something you ate? Was it the way the air smelled? And
so on. The more you can specifically isolate what made the memory
enchanting, the more you can practice positive states of well being.

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