• Embed Doc
  • Readcast
  • Collections
  • CommentGo Back
Download
 
The Project Gutenberg EBook of Tremendous Trifles, by G.K. ChestertonCopyright laws are changing all over the world. Be sure to check thecopyright laws for your country before downloading or redistributingthis or any other Project Gutenberg eBook.This header should be the first thing seen when viewing this ProjectGutenberg file. Please do not remove it. Do not change or edit theheader without written permission.Please read the "legal small print," and other information about theeBook and Project Gutenberg at the bottom of this file. Included isimportant information about your specific rights and restrictions inhow the file may be used. You can also find out about how to make adonation to Project Gutenberg, and how to get involved.**Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts****eBooks Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971*******These eBooks Were Prepared By Thousands of Volunteers!*****Title: Tremendous TriflesAuthor: G.K. ChestertonRelease Date: May, 2005 [EBook #8092][This file was first posted on June 13, 2003]Edition: 10Language: EnglishCharacter set encoding: US-ASCII*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK, TREMENDOUS TRIFLES ***TREMENDOUS TRIFLESbyG. K. ChestertonPrefaceThese fleeting sketches are all republished by kind permissionof the Editor of the DAILY NEWS, in which paper they appeared.They amount to no more than a sort of sporadic diary--a diary
 
recording one day in twenty which happened to stick in the fancy--the only kind of diary the author has ever been able to keep.Even that diary he could only keep by keeping it in public,for bread and cheese. But trivial as are the topics theyare not utterly without a connecting thread of motive. As thereader's eye strays, with hearty relief, from these pages,it probably alights on something, a bed-post or a lamp-post,a window blind or a wall. It is a thousand to one that thereader is looking at something that he has never seen: that is,never realised. He could not write an essay on such a post orwall: he does not know what the post or wall mean. He couldnot even write the synopsis of an essay; as "The Bed-Post; ItsSignificance--Security Essential to Idea of Sleep--Night Feltas Infinite--Need of Monumental Architecture," and so on.He could not sketch in outline his theoretic attitude towardswindow-blinds, even in the form of a summary. "The Window-Blind--Its Analogy to the Curtain and Veil--Is Modesty Natural?--Worship of and Avoidance of the Sun, etc., etc." None of usthink enough of these things on which the eye rests. But don'tlet us let the eye rest. Why should the eye be so lazy? Let usexercise the eye until it learns to see startling facts that runacross the landscape as plain as a painted fence. Let us beocular athletes. Let us learn to write essays on a stray cat ora coloured cloud. I have attempted some such thing in whatfollows; but anyone else may do it better, if anyone else willonly try.Contents ChapterI Tremendous TriflesII A Piece of ChalkIII The Secret of a TrainIV The Perfect GameV The Extraordinary CabmanVI An AccidentVII The Advantages of Having One LegVIII The End of the WorldIX In the Place de la BastilleX On Lying in BedXI The Twelve MenXII The Wind and the TreesXIII The DickensianXIV In Topsy-Turvy LandXV What I Found in My PocketXVI The Dragon's GrandmotherXVII The Red AngelXVIII The TowerXIX How I Met the PresidentXX The GiantXXI The Great ManXXII The Orthodox BarberXXIII The Toy TheatreXXIV A Tragedy of TwopenceXXV A Cab Ride Across CountryXXVI The Two NoisesXXVII Some Policemen and a MoralXXVIII The LionXXIX Humanity: An Interlude
 
XXX The Little Birds Who Won't SingXXXI The Riddle of the IvyXXXII The Travellers in StateXXXIII The Prehistoric Railway StationXXXIV The DiabolistXXXV A Glimpse of My CountryXXXVI A Somewhat Improbable StoryXXXVII The Shop of GhostsXXXVIII The Ballade of a Strange TownXXXIX The Mystery of a PageantITremendous TriflesOnce upon a time there were two little boys who lived chieflyin the front garden, because their villa was a model one.The front garden was about the same size as the dinner table;it consisted of four strips of gravel, a square of turf with somemysterious pieces of cork standing up in the middle and one flowerbed with a row of red daisies. One morning while they were at playin these romantic grounds, a passing individual, probably the milkman,leaned over the railing and engaged them in philosophical conversation.The boys, whom we will call Paul and Peter, were at least sharplyinterested in his remarks. For the milkman (who was, I need say,a fairy) did his duty in that state of life by offering themin the regulation manner anything that they chose to ask for.And Paul closed with the offer with a business-like abruptness,explaining that he had long wished to be a giant that he might strideacross continents and oceans and visit Niagara or the Himalayasin an afternoon dinner stroll. The milkman producing a wand fromhis breast pocket, waved it in a hurried and perfunctory manner;and in an instant the model villa with its front garden was like atiny doll's house at Paul's colossal feet. He went striding awaywith his head above the clouds to visit Niagara and the Himalayas.But when he came to the Himalayas, he found they were quite smalland silly-looking, like the little cork rockery in the garden; and whenhe found Niagara it was no bigger than the tap turned on in the bathroom.He wandered round the world for several minutes trying to findsomething really large and finding everything small, till in sheerboredom he lay down on four or five prairies and fell asleep.Unfortunately his head was just outside the hut of an intellectualbackwoodsman who came out of it at that moment with an axe in one handand a book of Neo-Catholic Philosophy in the other. The man lookedat the book and then at the giant, and then at the book again.And in the book it said, "It can be maintained that the evilof pride consists in being out of proportion to the universe."So the backwoodsman put down his book, took his axe and,working eight hours a day for about a week, cut the giant's head off;and there was an end of him.Such is the severe yet salutary history of Paul. But Peter, oddlyenough, made exactly the opposite request; he said he had longwished to be a pigmy about half an inch high; and of course heimmediately became one. When the transformation was over he foundhimself in the midst of an immense plain, covered with a tall greenjungle and above which, at intervals, rose strange trees each with
of 00

Leave a Comment

You must be to leave a comment.
Submit
Characters: ...
You must be to leave a comment.
Submit
Characters: ...