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These are the FACTS:* There is no Control button on Altaf Hussain's computer. Altaf Hussain is always incontrol.* The saddest moment for a child is not when he learns Santa Claus isn't real, it'swhen he learns Altaf Hussain is.* Altaf Hussain once visited The Virgin Islands, they are now known as The Islands.* Altaf Hussain was created in a secret Pakistani laboratory, and was supposed to beraised as a caged experiment. Nobody knows what happened next, but there are nowno scientists in Pakistan.* Altaf Hussain doesn't sleep. He waits.* Altaf Hussain once punched a man in the soul.* Altaf Hussain's calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd..No one foolsAltaf.* If you have £5 and Altaf Hussain has £5, Altaf Hussain has more money than you.* There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Altaf Hussain has allowed tolive.* Altaf Hussain is the only one who can "try this at home".
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