5 Advantages of Having aHidden Disability That WeForget About
by Lisa Copen
So often we only see the drawbacks to livingwith a chronic illness that is not visible. But asmy own illness, rheumatoid arthritis, progresses, I can see the benefits of being ableto hide your illness or choose to reveal it based on the circumstances or your owndesires.I rarely see the changes in my own body, such as my hands or feet deformities, unless Isee a reflection in the mirror, for example when I am trying to clothes in a dressing roomat a store. I've heard children ask their mom, "What is wrong with her feet?" as they'velooked under the divider from a nearby dressing room. I can't help but wonder how people don't realize I have some sort of illness when they see my hands and fingers.In the television show about the documentary of Farrah Fawcett's battle with cancer her son said something like, "I know she will be fine. She just looks so good." Those of uswith invisible illness are tempted to throw up our hands in frustration at these sort of comments. They sound like the familiar "You don't look sick" observations people tell us.Yet, it was true. Some days she did look like the beautiful bombshell most of usremember. But other days she looked like someone struggling to survive cancer, in thefight of her life.So it is no secret that it can be frustrating to appear to be healthy when you are feelingawful. And yet, let's be honest. Do you really want to look like how you feel? There aresome benefits to having an illness that can't be seen by everyone. Let's look at a few of those perks.[1] You get to choose who to reveal your illness to and who not to. Some people you mayimmediately confide in; others you may wait and see if they feel "safe." Some people youmay never tell about your illness.[2] You don't receive advice about how to treat your illness. Since it's invisible you don'thave to listen to people sharing about the experience of their aunt's mother's neighbor who had that same disease and how she cured it herself. If you make the choice to tellsomeone, especially a stranger, than you are opening yourself up to a can of worms, butit's still your choice.[3] You can go to work and do your job without people having preconceived notionsabout what you can do or cannot do because of your illness. You get the option to reveal
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