Extract from

Journey

Once upon a time there was a girl called Bea - that’s me by the way. It’s short for Beatrix, but no potter or rabbit jokes please - and she was a happy carefree girl cycling toa secret rendezvous with Justin, who’s this really cute boy I sit next to in Physics.It was secret because everyone knows that Charlotte’s really into him and so noone would even dare look at him, but he thinks she’s a skanky hoe so he wanted to meetme at the park. But I never made it cos I got hit by a bus.So I wake up in the hospital and my parents are all cooing over me and stuff and I’mlike ‘where’s Justin?’ And my Mum’s like ‘Justin?’ cos she’s heard about Justin and howhe’s a bit of a tear-away, which he is, which is why I like him but it’s not like I’m gonnamarry him or anything. So to keep the peace I calmly replied I was dreaming about JustinTimberlake.Which is when this doctor walks in and I’m like what the hell’s been going on costhe last thing I remember was cycling merrily along O’Neill Street. That’s when they tell meI didn’t stop at the end of the road but sailed into the path of an on-coming bus. Luckily itwas just a little shopper-hopper but I wasn’t exactly wearing my helmet. I was concussedand shipped to the hospital. I’m never gonna hear the end of that no helmet thing though,but really it flattens my hair!My folks then, who by this time were practically wetting themselves with anticipationbecause everything was taking sooooooo long, threw themselves at this poor doctor and,in the politest possible way DEMANDED to know what the HELL was going on?So this doc takes a deep, meaningful breath before saying he’d received the resultsof the CAT scan and there appeared to be no permanent damage from the accident.