Welcome to Scribd. Sign in or start your free trial to enjoy unlimited e-books, audiobooks & documents.Find out more
Download
Standard view
Full view
of .
Look up keyword
Like this
7Activity
0 of .
Results for:
No results containing your search query
P. 1
Male Menopause, How It Impacts Men, Women, And Families

Male Menopause, How It Impacts Men, Women, And Families

Ratings:

4.5

(1)
|Views: 711|Likes:
Published by Jed Diamond
Male Menopause, or more accurately, Andropause, affects all men, generally between the ages of 40 and 55. However, it can begin as early as 35 or as late as 65.

As with puberty, there are hormonal, physiological, psychological, interpersonal, social, sexual, and spiritual dimensions.

It can have a major impact on the man, his partner, and their family.

Based on the best-selling book (now translated into 25 foreign languages) Male Menopause, this title will give help you understand what's going on and what you can do to keep male menopause from adversely affecting your life.
Male Menopause, or more accurately, Andropause, affects all men, generally between the ages of 40 and 55. However, it can begin as early as 35 or as late as 65.

As with puberty, there are hormonal, physiological, psychological, interpersonal, social, sexual, and spiritual dimensions.

It can have a major impact on the man, his partner, and their family.

Based on the best-selling book (now translated into 25 foreign languages) Male Menopause, this title will give help you understand what's going on and what you can do to keep male menopause from adversely affecting your life.

More info:

Published by: Jed Diamond on Jul 18, 2009
Copyright:Attribution Non-commercial

Availability:

Read on Scribd mobile: iPhone, iPad and Android.
download as DOC, PDF, TXT or read online from Scribd
See more
See less

02/05/2013

pdf

text

original

 
Male Menopause: How It Impacts Men, Women, and Families
By Jed Diamond, Ph.D.E-Mail: Jed@MenAlive.com
 
“Man is not the enemy here, but the fellow victim.”
Betty FriedanThe male mid-life is often talked about in general or humorous terms, butrarely is it discussed seriously. Jed Diamond is a world authority on men inthe mid-life period, and here he suggests an alternative to the traditionaltreatment given to men in the media.“Dear Abby:
 I am a 50-year-old man who has been married for 22 years. My wife and I have twowonderful teen-aged children. About six months ago, my wife’s niece (I’ll call her Rene), whom I had never met, came from another country to live with us so shecould go to college in the United States. She is in her early 20s.” As I read AbigailVan Buren’s (Dear Abby) column in my local newspaper, I shook my head andthought, “Here’s another family headed for trouble.”“For the first few months everything was fine. Now I find myself thinking about Reneall the time. I think I’m in love with her. I travel quite a bit because of my job andevery time I come home it’s torture. I have to act as if nothing is going on in mymind. No one knows the way I feel,” the letter went on.“If I tell my wife, she’ll be crushed and it will be the end of our marriage. If I tellRene—who has done nothing wrong and loves my wife like a mother—she maywant to return to her country without finishing her studies.I have always tried to do the right thing. I never thought at this age I’d be feeling thisway. I don’t want to ruin anyone’s life, including my own. What should I do?”
Desperate in Delaware
 
 
Abby’s response was clear and direct.“Dear Desperate
:Although it’s common for older men to fantasize about younger women, theconsequences of your fantasy could irreparably damage at least five lives. Talkingthis out with someone you trust would be helpful. I recommend a professionaltherapist, who can help you assess the consequences of acting out this fantasy.”Though Abby’s advice was good, I felt it didn’t get to the heart of the matter. What isreally going on in the lives of millions of mid-life men? How can we help our teen-age children deal with
their 
hormonal, physical, emotional, and sexual changeswhen we are so confused about our own? What can we do to help families getthrough this difficult time of life without splitting apart?Based on my own research that culminated in the publication of my book,
MaleMenopause
, I sent a response to Dear Abby.I was pleasantly surprised that my letter ran under a headline for her column whichappeared in newspapers all over the country -
SYMPTOMS OF MALEMENOPAUSE ARE REAL“Dear Abby,
Thank you for the sensitive response to Desperate in Delaware, a 50-year-old manwith an obsessive attraction to a younger woman. I have been a psychotherapist for 35 years and have seen too many men destroy their own lives and the lives of those they love because they didn't understand the inevitable changes that go on ina man's body, mind, and spirit at mid-life.I've found that my understanding of these issues has been greatly expanded sincerecognizing that men go through a form of “male menopause," generally betweenthe ages of 40 and 55.Marc Blackman, M.D., chief of endocrinology and metabolism at Johns HopkinsBayview Medical Center says, "The male menopause is a real phenomenon and itdoes similar things to men as menopause does to women, although less commonlyand to a lesser extent."I believe thousands of families could be saved from splitting apart if men andwomen learned about the newest research findings on this crucial time of life.
More than 25 million men in the U.S. are now going through malemenopause.
52% of men between 40 and 70 suffer from some degree of erectiledysfunction.
Men, like women, experience complex hormonal rhythms that affect their mood, their physical well-being, and their sexuality.
Emotional symptoms include irritability, worry, indecisiveness, anddepression.
Physical symptoms include fatigue, weight gain, short-term memory loss,and sleep disturbances.
Sexual symptoms include reduced libido, fear of sexual failure, and
 
increased desire to "prove" he can still perform by seeking a younger partner.
Male menopause is like puberty the second time around where a man mustface issues of identity, sexuality, dependence, and independence.
When a man is going through Male Menopause it makes it very difficult tobe an effective parent.
A Woman’s Concern
I receive hundreds of letters a week from women who are confused about what ishappening to the man of the house. “I believe my husband is experiencing malemenopause,” this one began. “My husband attended a training course away fromhome for five weeks. He asked me to visit during the third week, which I did. It waslike a romantic get-away for both of us. But when he returned two weeks later something had changed.”“I knew something was wrong when I met him at the airport,” her letter continued.“He was very moody, said nothing was wrong, and wouldn’t talk. When we madelove, he found it difficult to obtain an erection and seemed angry when I tried to talkwith him. Since then he’s become more and more withdrawn and uncommunicative.He insists there isn’t another woman involved and seemed surprised that I wouldeven bring it up.“What really hurts is how he treats our daughter. They have always been veryclose, like best pals. Lately he is critical of everything she does. He snaps at her,then apologizes, and later does it all over again. She and I both feel we have towalk on egg shells. Clearly something is very wrong. Our daughter is beginning tospend more time away from home. I’m sure it’s because she is so hurt by her father’s sudden change of behavior. What’s going on? What can I do?”
A Man Gains Insight
Jake wrote me to tell me how he had come to understand that Male Menopausewas at the center of the stress he was experiencing with his family. “I’m 45 year’sold and have been married to my wife for 23 years. We have four children whorange in age from 9 to 19. Until recently I was the kind of Dad I had always wantedto be—involved with their lives, caring, concerned. But something changed when Ihit 40. Not since I was a child did I feel such a deep-seated anger and sadness. Iwould yell at the kids, which I never used to do. Late at night I’d lay in bed with mywife and cry my eyes out. I couldn’t believe it was me. I’m a grown man, a truckdriver, for heaven’s sake, throwing a tantrum like a four-year old or bawling like ababy.I never knew that depression in men often expresses itself in anger. That wascertainly the case with me. I was often irritated and grouchy and sometimes wouldhave angry outbursts over the least little thing. I would tend to blame it on my wifeor the kids. I know they began to withdraw and lose respect for me, which made mefeel even worse.One of the most difficult aspects of this time of life is the uncertainty. I questioneverything. I have faith in nothing. Even though I hate the way I feel, I can’t seem todo anything constructive. I seem to be on a downward slide and I am destroying myfamily. There are times I think of killing myself. At least I wouldn’t be hurting those Ilove the most.

You're Reading a Free Preview

Download
scribd
/*********** DO NOT ALTER ANYTHING BELOW THIS LINE ! ************/ var s_code=s.t();if(s_code)document.write(s_code)//-->