jjay223

wirte more its good

rachel7195

the story seems good but it is hard to follow with all of the sentences running together, try spacing them out like in a real book, it will make it easier to read, also if you had made Bella human, like if they would have met back before he was turned into a vampire, just a suggestion..

1997feb123

well i like the story of bella going back but i think you could have made her a character human edward loved or had a crush on and plus its confusing at the end