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Things in life that matterA philosophy professor stood before his class with some items on the tablein front of him. When the class began, wordlessly he picked up a verylarge and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with rocks, about2 inches in diameter.He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them intothe jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles, of course, rolled into theopen areas between the rocks.He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was. The professor picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course,the sand filled up everything else.He then asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded witha unanimous “Yes.”“Now,” said the professor, “I want you to recognize that this jar representsyour life. The rocks are the important things – your family, your partner,your health, your children – things that if everything else was lost and onlythey remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter – like your job, your house,your car. The sand is everything else. The small stuff.”“If you put the sand into the jar first,” he continued “there is no room forthe pebbles or the rocks. The same goes for your life.If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will neverhave room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to thethings that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Takeyour partner out dancing. There will always be time to go to work, cleanthe house, give a dinner party and fix the disposal. Take care of the rocks first – the things that really matter. Set yourpriorities. The rest is just sand.” Live and WorkFather was a hardworking man who delivered bread as a living to supporthis wife and three children. He spent all his evenings after work attendingclasses, hoping to improve himself so that he could one day find a betterpaying job. Except for Sundays, Father hardly ate a meal together with hisfamily. He worked and studied very hard because he wanted to provide hisfamily with the best money could buy.Whenever the family complained that he was not spending enough timewith them, he reasoned that he was doing all this for them. But he oftenyearned to spend more time with his family.

The day came when the examination results were announced. To his joy,Father passed, and with distinctions too! Soon after, he was offered agood job as a senior supervisor which paid handsomely.Like a dream come true, Father could now afford to provide his family withlife’s little luxuries like nice clothing, fine food and vacation abroad.However, the family still did not get to see father for most of the week. Hecontinued to work very hard, hoping to be promoted to the position of manager. In fact, to make himself a worthily candidate for the promotion,he enrolled for another course in the open university.Again, whenever the family complained that he was not spending enoughtime with them, he reasoned that he was doing all this for them. But heoften yearned to spend more time with his family.Father’s hard work paid off and he was promoted. Jubilantly, he decided tohire a maid to relieve his wife from her domestic tasks. He also felt thattheir three-room flat was no longer big enough, it would be nice for hisfamily to be ablt to enjoy the facilities and comfort of a condominium.Having experienced the rewards of his hard work many times before,Father resolved to further his studies and work at being promoted again. The family still did not get to see much of him. In fact, sometimes Fatherhad to work on Sundays entertaining clients. Again, whenever the familycomplained that he was not spending enough time with them, hereasoned that he was doing all this for them. But he often yearned tospend more time with his family.As expected, Father’s hard work paid off again and he bought a beautifulcondominium overlooking the coast of Singapore. On the first Sundayevening at their new home, Father declared to his family that he decidednot to take anymore courses or pursue any more promotions. From thenon he was going to devote more time to his family.Father did not wake up the next day.Give Time for your FamilyAfter 21 years of marriage, my wife wanted me to take another womanout to dinner and a movie. She said, “I love you, but I know this otherwoman loves you and would love to spend some time with you.” The other woman that my wife wanted me to visit was my MOTHER, whohas been a widow for 19 years, but the demands of my work and my threechildren had made it possible to visit her only occasionally. That night Icalled to invite her to go out for dinner and a movie. “What’s wrong, areyou well?” she asked.My mother is the type of woman who suspects that a late night call or asurprise invitation is a sign of bad news. “I thought that it would bepleasant to spend some time with you,” I responded. “Just the two of us.”

She thought about it for a moment, and then said, “I would like that verymuch.” That Friday after work, as I drove over to pick her up I was a bit nervous.When I arrived at her house, I noticed that she, too, seemed to be nervousabout our date. She waited in the door with her coat on. She had curledher hair and was wearing the dress that she had worn to celebrate her lastwedding anniversary. She smiled from a face that was as radiant as anangel’s. “I told my friends that I was going to go out with my son, andthey were impressed, “she said, as she got into the car. “They can’t waitto hear about our meeting.”We went to a restaurant that, although not elegant, was very nice andcozy. My mother took my arm as if she were the First Lady. After we satdown, I had to read the menu. Her eyes could only read large print. Half way through the entries, I lifted my eyes and saw Mom sitting therestaring at me. A nostalgic smile was on her lips. “It was I who used tohave to read the menu when you were small,” she said. “Then it’s timethat you relax and let me return the favor,” I responded. During thedinner, we had an agreeable conversation – nothing extraordinary butcatching up on recent events of each other’s life. We talked so much thatwe missed the movie. As we arrived at her house later, she said, “I’ll goout with you again, but only if you let me invite you.” I agreed.“How was your dinner date?” asked my wife when I got home. “Very nice.Much more so than I could have imagined,” I answered.A few days later, my mother died of a massive heart attack. It happenedso suddenly that I didn’t have a chance to do anything for her. Some timelater, I received an envelope with a copy of a restaurant receipt from thesame place mother and I had dined. An attached note said: “I paid this billin advance. I wasn’t sure that I could be there; but nevertheless, I paid fortwo plates – one for you and the other for your wife. You will never knowwhat that night meant for me. I love you, son.”At that moment, I understood the importance of saying in time: “I LOVE YOU” and to give our loved ones the time that they deserve. Nothing inlife is more important than your family. Give them the time they deserve,because these things cannot be put off till “some other time.” The Little BoySally jumped up as soon as she saw the surgeon come out of theoperating room. She said: “How is my little boy? Is he going to be all right?When can I see him?” The surgeon said, “I’m sorry. We did all we could, but your boy didn’tmake it.”