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How to Release Self Hatred

How to Release Self Hatred

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Published by S. James Webb

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Published by: S. James Webb on Aug 13, 2009
Copyright:Attribution Non-commercial

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05/11/2014

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How to Release Self-Hatred
We all suffer from it to some degree.Maybe we were told that we’re sinners, or that we were born with originalsin. Even if that’s not the way we think today, if we were taught these thingsas children, those tapes are still playing deep down inside, like embeddedmp3’s.Or it could have other roots, from our parents to our siblings to our teacherstelling us we weren’t good enough in any of a thousand ways. Even if wedidn’t really believe it, our efficient new little minds took it in as part of ourlessons about what life on this planet was all about. And one of the things wefound out was that we weren’t good enough.It’s not that just our actions weren’t good enough, but that there wassomething fundamentally “wrong” with our selves. Then here we are, years later, all grown up, and just when we think we’reover it, BAM! We catch ourselves saying things like “what an idiot I am” or“how could I be so selfish?”So how do we get over it? It’s not like we deliberately hold on to the thoughtsof unworthiness and guilt. It’s that we just can’t seem to help it.If you’ve ever said something like, “I can’t help what I’m thinking!” there’syour first clue. You’re not in charge of your mind. Don’t feel bad. Nobody is ata conscious level. The problem is that we have two minds. Our conscious mind is the part of uswe’re aware of, it’s the ego, and it thinks that’s who we are. But it’s only themost superficial part of who we are. In fact, it’s our subconscious that’sdriving our bus, and that’s the part we’re protesting against when we saythat we can’t help what we’re thinking.Our conscious mind is not in control, and of course the conscious mind reallycan’t help what we’re thinking on a deeper level – the level that reallycontrols our lives.Psychotherapy may be useful here, and it certainly is the mainstreamapproach to emotional problems. It tends to be very long term oriented andexpensive, and while it is helpful for some people, the results are not asconsistent or as deep as with some newer methods.Sometimes enlightened pastoral counseling can be helpful as well. This iswhen you would go to your clergy for counseling. This can be useful

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