HOW TO PERFORM A WEDDING CEREMONY

(EVEN IF IT IS YOUR FIRST TIME)

(www.WeddingIncome.com) | Dr. Kelly Carr

 Dedication

This e-book is dedicated to all the men and women

who dedicate their time to helping young couples prepare
for their Wedding Day and making it the day of their dreams.

~2~
 How To Perform A Wedding…
(Even If It Is Your FIRST Time)

I can remember how frightened I was when I performed my very first wedding. I was
still in seminary and in my 20's and it was a small wedding in a home, but it seemed a
daunting task. The thoughts raced through my mind constantly as I prepared such as
"What will I say?" "What will I do?" "What is the right order for everything?" "What
happens if I mess up?" "Where can I find a wedding ceremony?" "If I mess up their
wedding will they still be my friends afterwards?"

That was 25 years ago, and I have performed weddings over 400 times since then and
have "messed up" many times (in small ways), but I have never had anyone leave mad
and have never been featured on "America's Funniest Videos." Keep in mind that what
is a large mistake in your mind, is often completely unnoticed by the crowd or even the
couple since it was probably only an intention in your mind that you did not follow
through on or a small word mix up, etc.

Let me give you the quick and easy way to perform a flawless (OK semi-flawless)
wedding ceremony. It will at least increase your odds of doing a good job by a ton,
even if it is your first time. I am assuming that you have been asked to do this by
friends or family or church members who have confidence in you and that you are
legally certified to do it. You probably have some public speaking experience already or
you would not have been asked to perform the ceremony so I am not going to cover
Public Speaking 101. I am going to focus on the "mechanics" of performing the
wedding ceremony. This is something that I have rarely if ever seen anyone discuss. I
sure don't remember reading anything about it, but I wish I had 25 years ago.

Step One

Find a good basic wedding ceremony. You can find this in many places. Look through
ministers manuals. Find something you can use as a template. You can find a
readymade wedding ceremony template at www.WeddingVowKit.com .

~3~
 Step Two

Sit down with the couple ahead of time and find out what they want included in their
wedding. I am finding that many couples are wanting "simple." Write down their names
correctly and ask them how to pronounce their names. Write them down in such a way
that you can see how to pronounce them. Take notes in your meeting and get all the
details.

Step Three

Find a good order of service. Look at wedding programs. They vary, but many have
the same basic elements of the wedding ceremony and show who does what. The
basic elements are seating of the families / mothers, groom and groomsmen enter
(there are variations), bridal party enters, bride enters, presentation of the bride, bride
and groom at the front, message by minister, wedding vows, ring vows, unity candle
(optional), pronouncement of marriage and kiss, blessing and prayer, presentation of
couple, recessional, announcement about reception.

Step Four

Sit down with your wedding ceremony and order of service side by side to see the
transitions for yourself. Make yourself some note in the margins of your ceremony.

Step Five

Meet and Discuss details ahead of time with the wedding planner or wedding
coordinator if they have one. Ask them their preferences. They will be extremely
helpful. Find out how weddings are usually performed in that venue or wedding
location.

Step Six

Sketch out a walkthrough of the entire ceremony on paper using bullet points. If you are
fortunate enough to have a skilled wedding coordinator, then you will only have to be
responsible for the ceremony portion of the wedding rehearsal. The ceremony itself
should only take about 12-15 minutes.

~4~
 Step Seven

Print out a rough draft of your wedding ceremony. Take notes on it to show the
transitions. What are transitions? When you are performing a wedding ceremony there
are several different parts of the ceremony, when the bride and her father walk down
the aisle and you ask everyone to stand, when you welcome everyone, when you
present the bride, when the couple takes their place in front of you, when you give your
message, when you begin the vows, etc. Mark up your rough draft.

Step Eight

Print out a copy of the wedding ceremony with the bride's and groom's names in a
booklet form. This is usually 8x11 sheet of paper that is printed in 2 columns on front
and back that can be folded to form a 4 page booklet. If you use Microsoft Word then
when you get ready to print, you can click "print" from the file menu, then go to
"properties," then click on duplex and choose booklet form. This will allow you to print
to both sides. On some printers you may have to choose "manual duplex" which means
you will have to print one side, manually take the paper out and then put it back in the
appropriate way to print the next page on the opposite side. Be prepared to experiment
with this a few times to figure it out. Be prepared to use several sheets of paper before
you finally get it right, but don't give up.

Step Nine

Write yourself some notes about the transitions in the margin of your wedding
ceremony. (Example: Who gives this woman...Father answers, "Her mother and I do."
Father kisses bride, shakes groom's hand, places their hands together and is seated.
Bride and Groom step to front. Remind bride to give her flowers to maid of honor.)

Step Ten

Use the "red rubber band method." Fold your completed wedding ceremony in half into
a mini booklet. Open your Bible to the appropriate page probably someplace close to
the center. Place your ceremony in the Bible and then take a "red rubber band" and
stretch it in the center fold of the ceremony and over the spine to hold it in place and
keep it from blowing out of your Bible on a windy day. (Note: If you have a special
reading such as a Unity Candle or Sand Ceremony print them out on a separate sheet
of paper in the same booklet format and use the "red rubber band method" on them too.
Make a note in your wedding ceremony where the special reading appears so you will
know to flip back to that page. Mark it with a paper clip if you need to.)

~5~
 Step Eleven

Attend the wedding rehearsal. Again, hopefully, the happy couple has a wedding
coordinator who will instruct everyone on where to be and when. If not, then they will be
looking to you to do that since you are the minister. Do yourself a favor and find out
before the wedding rehearsal. If you are in charge, then get a good book on how to
conduct a wedding rehearsal. The rehearsal will help you and the couple and everyone
involved know the order and flow of the service. Find out where you are supposed to be
before the ceremony begins; when you are supposed to enter; Where you are supposed
to stand; what type of microphone you will be using, handheld or lapel; when you are
supposed to exit; if you are expected to invite people to the reception; etc. After the
rehearsal, update your wedding ceremony and make any changes that you discovered
during the rehearsal. (Note: If you need help conducting the wedding rehearsal and
you never have done it before, then you can find some help at
www.WeddingRehearsalGenie.com .)

Step Twelve

On the day of the wedding, arrive early, 30 - 60 minutes early. Check in with the
wedding planner. Check in with the DJ or Audio Visual Tech and do a microphone
check. Check in with the groom. check in with the bride. Go somewhere where you
can be alone to read through your ceremony. Since you have read through the
ceremony several times, you will not have to read it word for word. You will have it in
front of you in case you mess up or lose your place. But you can refer to it as needed
and it will keep you on track. Some parts you will want to read, such as selected
readings or poems, and the wedding vows. I still get alone and go over the ceremony
even though I have done hundreds of weddings. After the ceremony, sign the license,
be available for a couple of photos, and enjoy the reception or if you have other
responsibilities then slip out quietly.

Summary

Following these simple steps will allow you to perform a beautiful wedding ceremony
that you will be proud of, the couple will be grateful for, and you will be able to repeat as
needed. It will also keep you and the couple who is trusting you from being
embarrassed in front of family and friends. Work hard on the preparation and then you
can enjoy the process and the people.

~6~
 About The Author

Dr. Kelly Carr holds degrees in ministry from Liberty

University, Dallas Theological Seminary, and Southwestern
Baptist Theological Seminary. He has been in full time
ministry as a Pastor, Youth Pastor, and Church Pastor for
more than 20 years also holding leadership positions in the
community, association, state and national level. He has
performed more than 400 weddings and wedding renewal
ceremonies. Dr. Carr truly enjoys helping young couples
prepare for their weddings and their new life together. He
also enjoys working with Pastors and other Ministers and
helping them develop their ministries, and also helping them
increase their income opportunities by performing weddings.
Dr. Carr lives in Phoenix, Arizona with his beautiful bride of
24 years and his three awesome children. You can find
more of his resources for ministers at
www.WeddingIncome.com .

~7~
 Other Resources

Want to Customize your Wedding CEREMONY? See the Wedding Vow Kit
www.WeddingVowKit.com

Are You in Charge of Running a Wedding REHEARSAL?

You need the Wedding Rehearsal Genie.
www.WeddingRehearsalGenie.com

Not sure about Wedding ETIQUETTE for Announcements or Costs? Get Answers at
www.WeddingEtiquetteAnswers.com

Are you a Pastor or Minister and want to Earn Extra Income?

Let me show you how
www.WeddingIncome.com

Looking for a Wedding OFFICIANT in Arizona?

www.ArizonaWeddingsPastor.com

The 20 lbs in 28 Days Proven Weight Loss Secret. See Cynthia's Secret
www.DietingSecretWeapon.com

Wedding Party GAMES, FAST, FUN, PRINTABLE RIGHT NOW!

www.WeddingSuppliesPlus.com/store/category/wedding-party-games/

Most Memorable Wedding FAVORS for Your Guests

www.WeddingSuppliesPlus.com/store/popular-wedding-favors/

Need some HUMOR for your Wedding Reception?

http://amazinglifenow.com/amazingweddings/weddinghumor.htm

Have to give the Wedding TOAST? Need Instant Help?

Instant Wedding Speeches and Toasts

Perfectly Customized WEDDING INVITATIONS

www.WeddingSuppliesPlus.com/store/category/wedding-invitations-cards/

Absolutely Free Downloadable resource for you. No need to register.

Just click and download. You are literally 2 clicks away from possessing
it right now.
http://www.weddingincome.com/bestweddingresources.html

Earn 50% Commissions as a Wedding Income Toolkit Affiliate

http://www.weddingincome.com/affiliates.html

~8~