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Fred Allen

Fred Allen

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Published by mainwaring
Fred Allen vs Jack Benny
Fred Allen vs Jack Benny

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Published by: mainwaring on Sep 01, 2009
Copyright:Attribution Non-commercial

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10/13/2012

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Series: Fred Allen ShowShow: "King for a Day" With Jack BennyDate: May 26 1946
THE FRED ALLEN SHOWOriginally broadcast Sunday, May 26, 1946THEME MUSIC for about 5 secondsDe Marco Sisters:(SINGING OVER MUSIC) Mr. Allen...Mr. Allen...MUSIC STOPSFred:It isn't one of the Old Hickory Singers, kiddies.THEME MUSIC back up, play for another 8 secondsKenny:(OVER MUSIC) The makers of Blue Bonnet Margarine and Tenderleaf Tea present theFred Allen show. With Fred's guests Mary Livingstone's husband, Portland Hoffa,Minerva Pious as Mrs. Nussbaum, Alan Reed as Falstaff Openshaw, Parker Fennelly asTitus Moody, the De Marco Sisters, and Al Goodman and his orchestra. And until I starttooting the Claghorn, my name is Kenny Delmar.MUSIC PLAYS additional 5 seconds, STOPS.Kenny:Ladies and gentlemen, Shakespeare said "To be or not to be." Benjamin Franklin said"Remember: time is money." But for the last eight months all I've said is, Here he isagain: Fred Allen!APPLAUSEFred:Thank you and good evening, ladies and gentlemen. And Kenny: I happened to overhear your opening remarks. Lad, if you are unhappy in your work...Kenny:Well, how can I be happy, Fred? Every Sunday, what do I do? I have one line: Here heis again.
 
Fred:Kenny, the man who invented the telephone only had one line when he started.Kenny:Yeah, but Fred, I'm not getting any place in radio; it's the same on my other show.Fred:Oh, you're on another a...Kenny:The Lucky Strikes program.Fred:Oh, the Lucky Strike program. What do you do on that?Kenny:You know when the man says L-S-M-F-T?Fred:Yeah...Kenny:Then the tobacco auctioneer says ya-ta-fa ya-ta-fa sold, American?Fred:Uh-huh...Kenny:Then a voice says, "You bet!"Fred:"You bet"...Kenny:Another voice says, "Yes sir!"Fred:
 
"Yes sir"...Kenny:The voice that says "Yes sir" is mine.Fred:You're beaten down on that show too, huh? Kenny, why don't you give up that other joband just work on our show?Kenny:You mean, you'll pay me the extra money?Fred: No, Kenny, but I tell you what I shall do: I'll let you add the line you have on the LuckyStrike program to the line you have on our show. Put them together, now, and see howthey sound.Kenny:Here he is again, yes sir!Fred:How is that?Kenny:Well, that's more like it, Fred. Now I've got something to do!Fred:As long as you're happy, Kenny, that's...Portland:Mr. Allen!Fred:Well, Portland!APPLAUSEFred:Well, Portland, pull up an old rejoinder and sit down. What's new?

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