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Caribou Lou In: Dog Nuts

Caribou Lou In: Dog Nuts

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Published by Caribou Lou
Caribou Lou and a strange dog cross paths in order for his lewd quest to continue. P.S. I created the character and name Caribou Lou based off the need to create a new version of Joe Camel (since he was killed off in the mid-90's because of some crappy smoking advertisement law), which is why Caribou Lou is always smoking. Hence the name Caribou Lou is an animal name first and a human name last whereas Joe Camel's name is human first animal second. Yes I know no one cares, but I wanted to clarify this because I have seen that a rapper created a drink called Caribou Lou. I did not create the name based off of this drink. In fact I thought of the name back in 2006. P.P.S Caribou Lou should not be thought of as an animal/human like Joe Camel, he is simply a human just with a crazy name to fit his persona.
Caribou Lou and a strange dog cross paths in order for his lewd quest to continue. P.S. I created the character and name Caribou Lou based off the need to create a new version of Joe Camel (since he was killed off in the mid-90's because of some crappy smoking advertisement law), which is why Caribou Lou is always smoking. Hence the name Caribou Lou is an animal name first and a human name last whereas Joe Camel's name is human first animal second. Yes I know no one cares, but I wanted to clarify this because I have seen that a rapper created a drink called Caribou Lou. I did not create the name based off of this drink. In fact I thought of the name back in 2006. P.P.S Caribou Lou should not be thought of as an animal/human like Joe Camel, he is simply a human just with a crazy name to fit his persona.

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Published by: Caribou Lou on Sep 04, 2009
Copyright:Traditional Copyright: All rights reserved

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10/15/2012

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Scagway Enterprises Presents:
Caribou Lou and Dog Nuts
Caribou Lou was falling out of a window from a three story house when he spotted agolden retriever dancing on the front lawn. He immediately halted his descent andfloated on over to the bizarrely acting dog. He landed softly on the fresh cut grasswearing a golfing outfit and sporting a pipe in his hand. Lou went over to the dogand kneeled down by it. He took a few puffs from his pipe and gave the dog a veryquizzical look.“Hmmmm…” He ruminated on the dog’s comedic act, “Hmmm my boy, why are youdancing?” The dog just kept on dancing on his hind legs with his two front paws just danglingin the air, like some kind of pansy dog. The dog was also panting, as the act wasgiving him quite the exercise, despite its nonsensical meaning.“Do you have to pee?” Lou asked. The dog did not answer vocally, but did, as he was still dancing, take a dump on thegrass.“Fascinating…” Lou pondered and continued smoking his pipe. The dog panted heavier and continued dancing. Mind you, the dog was not literallydancing, but simply lifting his two hind legs in sequence giving him the appearanceof doing a half-wit’s gleeful dance. Caribou watched as the dog’s left leg lifted upthen down, rather cockishly, followed by the right. Caribou thought long and hardon the situation at-hand here. This was really big stuff. I mean bigger than findingout that you do indeed have enough money to pay that hooker the $49 you owe herand do not have to get beaten up by her pimp.“Say, what’s your name pup?” said an elderly gentleman who had sauntered onover from across the street. He looked at Caribou and extended his hand andintroduced himself, “The name’s Henry Daggot.”“Faggot, you say?” Said an annoyed Lou who couldn’t stand old people.“Excuse me?” Henry replied angrily.“Sir!” Caribou shouted as he jumped up, extolling expletives left and right.“ Can’tyou see what we are dealing with here, this is some very complicated, andridiculously huge stuff here!”“What is your name?” Asked Henry.
 
“Well it certainly isn’t Henry Faggot!” exclaimed Lou, who got in front of the oldman’s face.“Get away from me you psycho!” Henry tried pushing Lou away, but his de-calcifiedboney arms were no help. Lou backed away from old Henry so not to get any of hisoldness on him.“What is it with you old folks and being so god damned nosey?” Lou askedsomewhat rhetorically.“Who are you? Are you a friend of Peg’s?” Asked the old man who had backed awayfrom Lou a few feet.“I don’t have time for this jimmy jam!” Lou said and took out a mini umbrella andhooked it onto Henry’s sweater vest and pressed the button that opened it up.“The hell do you think you are doing?” asked Henry as he began lifting off theground. The umbrella was no ordinary umbrella, but one that became a copter of sorts and lifted old Henry into the sky. He continued blabbering his old feeble lipsabout calling the police, but Lou just waved him goodbye. Lou’s attention returnedto the dog. The dog just continued on what he was doing, although, during the heatedexchange Lou had with the old man, he did miss the dog finally taking a piss on thelawn. The dog was about to reach his plateau of his sacred dance of excrement.“This is it, Max, this is when the whole world will rejoice and call us heroes!” SaidLou to Max, who was a life sized paper maché clone of his. Max had the tendency torely on being carried by the wind rather than walking, since he couldn’t really walkanyway, he was paper maché. Max’s eyes glowed all orangey as if he, too, wasexcited, but then a strong gust simply took him away to some other far awaydestination.“See ya Max, this one’s for you!” Caribou roared and suddenly the dog’s nutsglowed and a bright white light emitted from its sack, which then enveloped CaribouLou.Caribou Lou was sent flying through some sort of inter-dimensional time warp thatsmelled like peanut butter, which would’ve been ok, except it was Jif peanut butter,which is, “Eh, alright.”Caribou Lou came out of this inter-dimensional time warp and ended up a couple of houses down from where he just was about a minute ago. In his mind, though, hewas in a new dimension where women were eager to show off their racks tostrangers, especially to Lou. He was going to test this theory of his by entering thevery house he had landed in front of, which had a busty woman exercising in theliving room.

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