Read without ads and support Scribd by becoming a Scribd Premium Reader.
See Premium Plans
 
 
Artful Engagement:Reflections on my Creative JourneyByMelinda Schwakhofer
1
 
 I embarked on the InsiderArt Art in Mental Health course as part of my exploration ofthe territory where I can merge art, creativity, spirituality and counseling. In January2007, I was asked to give an hour long presentation on my development as an artquilter to the SouthWest Quilters. This opportunity and the reflection that I have beendoing on the Art in Mental Health course have allowed me to begin telling my creativestory. Two weeks ago when I walked the labyrinth in my back yard the words “artfulengagement” came to me as soon as I reached the center. This is my creative storyso far.
Beginnings
I spent the first 35 years of my life in LosAngeles – a very urban environment. SouthernCalifornia is a very beautiful place, but it wassettled and planned by real estate developers.Every piece of open land has been concretedand built upon. Even the rolling hills are gradedand housing-tracted. Miles of streets andfreeways connect places like cement arteries.Even the Los Angeles River runs through aconcrete channel. Public transport is so poor that everyone has a car. It was likeliving in a machine.Ever since I was small, I had a deep longing to connect with Nature. I rememberstanding in my backyard one autumn when I was about seven. A vee of geese flewoverhead, honking to one another. I knew I was witnessing something very special.I have never seen geese fly overhead in LA since then. I went camping whenever Icould to the amazing National Parks in the Western US – mountains, deserts and thePacific coastline.When I got into my early 20’s I started going out to the deserts of the SouthwesternU.S. by myself for 2-3 weeks every year. I gained alot of confidence and fed my deep need forindependence and solitude. Those trips nurtured mysoul and I developed a deep, deep spiritualconnection with the land. I have Native Americanancestry from my father’s side of the family. I’mnamed after my Great grandmother Melindy Davis,who was a full-blooded Muscogee (Creek) Indian. Ithink that we inherit spiritual as well as genetic traitsfrom our ancestors. I can recall my dad saying thatwhen he was at the ocean he felt ‘connected toeverything that ever was, is or ever will be’. When I started my desert journeys Iunderstood what he was talking about and feeling.I also longed for seasons. In Southern California we had two seasons – hot andsmoggy from April to October and the rainy, mudslide season from November toMarch. There was one park near me with a few maple trees. Sometimes I’d gothere in the autumn and watch the leaves color and fall. In the springtime I’d go outto the desert to see the cacti and California poppies in bloom.
2
 
Creativity
I’ve been a creative person all of my life. Not just in making things, but the way I seethe world. When I was six, I got a dollhouse and swapped the kitchen and bathroomaround. If the dolls were outside playing and wanted to come in to pee they could goto the toilet downstairs and go right back outside. The kitchen was upstairs so theycould make food and then go eat and read in bed. I used to entrance my teen-agedsiblings and their friends with stories about how our mom would drive home fromwork through the telephone or kitchen faucet.My mother Nell encouraged me to notice and appreciate the natural and culturalworld around me– such as it was in suburban Los Angeles. She’d often call meoutside to look at the sunset – gorgeous corals, reds and oranges, courtesy of L.A.smog. Another time we had just got home from my preschool and she said ‘Look atthose dandelions in the front yard’. I didn’t know they were flowers and was lookingfor some real lions!My mom was also a creative influence on me in the way she created ‘home’. A veryartistic flair for decorating our house and she was a great gardener. She was a verystylish dresser and sewed most of her own clothes. She used to paint a little bit andwe had a painting in our living room of hers. We had a big bureau and the bottomdrawer was full of art supplies – construction paper, glitter, crayons, paints, glue – and a craft book. When she had time, my mom and I would make projects out of thebook. I loved thatNell used to take me to art house cinemas, Kabuki theatre performances, plays,concerts, musicals, museums….. We didn’t have a TV until I was 9 and even after wegot one if I was watching it during the daytime she’d say, ‘Melinda, why don’t you dosomething constructive like read a book or paint a picture’.
The story of the ivory fish
When I was about eight I went to an arts and crafts class. One day the teacher gaveus each a bar of Ivory hand soap and a knife and asked us to make something out ofit. I carved a crude little fish which I was very proud of and brought it home and put iton top of the piano. A couple of days later a dog appeared next to my fish which my18 year old sister Susan had carved. It was perfect and looked like a real dog thathad been turned to soap and miniaturised. I was gutted and felt really ashamed ofmy fish. I never talked to my mom or sister about it, but I took my fish to thebathroom sink and scrubbed all of the fishness out of it. I wasn’t able to reason thatmy sister had 10 years of carving skill on me and different creative/artistic talents.She was very artistically talented and probably could have been a graphic designeror illustrator. The ‘Ivory Fish’ not really a huge incident, but it stayed with me for areally long time.So on one hand, even though I just
was 
a creative person and had a quite rich andstimulating environment, my relationship with my older sister impacted on my creativeself esteem. Even now, at times when I make something or see someone else’s artwork, I struggle with feelings of inadequacy and thoughts like ‘This isn’t any good’ or‘Theirs’ is better’.
3
Search
Search History:
Searching...
Result 00 of 00
00 results for result for
  • p.
    • Notes
    Load more