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MAYONNAISE IN MY CAKEByWilliam E. SpearTwo Plus Plus Productions LLCClinton, New Jerseywww.TwoPlusPlus.comTwo.Plus.Plus.Productions@gmail.com
 
Mayonnaise in My CakeiSummary“The Clarksons, like most families, were a universeunto themselves. Unfathomable, but comically hostile,planets dominated the landscape.”Those are the thoughts of The Man. He is anacademically trained, professionally experienced chefwho owns a newly opened restaurant. He teaches collegeclasses and is prominent in business and philanthropiccircles. He is a successful and respected executive.Except when he is with his fiancée, Francessa, and herfamily, the Clarksons. During those times, he’sunnamed and invisible, more an accessory for her thana separate entity. Worse, his cheffing skills aredemeaned.But on a challenging Thanksgiving Day with his futurein-laws, The Man creates a memorable impression whenhe insists on not putting any mayonnaise in his cake.Main CharactersThe ManProfessional chef, restaurateur,and passionate about making greatfoods. Engaged to FrancessaClarkson but invisible to herfamily.Francessa ClarksonHappily engaged to The Man butbenignly neglects him when she’swith her family.Clarissa and SharissaFrancessa’s sisters. They areprotective of her and antagonistictoward him. Until the mayonnaise.AquaphobeThe hypochondriac of theClarksons. Allergic to water;can’t take baths but enduresshowers.Mr. ClarksonCommanding presence and boomingvoice. Otherwise, the patriarch ofthe Clarkson family is clueless.
 
Mayonnaise in My Cake1The man asked, “Are you sure this is a good idea?” Heknew that holidays were special to her family and theywere not expecting him on Thanksgiving Day. The woman,Francessa Clarkson, assured him that she would be withhim the entire evening. “Besides,” she said, “Everyonewants to hear about your new restaurant.”“That’s what I’m afraid of,” he said. His great joywas cooking. From soups to grilled lobster tails, hisstage was the kitchen. He had 15 years of academictraining and professional accomplishments. But when hewas around the Clarksons, everybody became a masterchef and ordered him around: try it this way, use abigger knife, get me a smaller pot, and, the worst, wedo it like this.But they were more than simply a collection ofopinionated people. The Clarksons, like most families,were a universe unto themselves. Unfathomable, butcomically hostile, planets dominated the landscape.And the man had not yet learned how to navigate theirterrains.

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Helen Winslow Blackleft a comment

ONE DOLLAR AND EIGHTY-SEVEN CENTS Your Tuesday Short Story today is that old chestnut with legs, "The Gift of the Magi" by O.Henry. Stunningly beautiful Snow Falling on Cedars is putting me in that Old Home mood. For your e-story, at year-end I'm rehighlighting some favorites from my oldest friends on Scribd. William is writing about Thanksgiving dinner here but we often do a turkey for Xmas too

Helen Winslow Black replied:

It was duck this year though, so I didn't have to go through that "Giblets in My Stuffing" issue TWICE. To giblet or not to giblet? It's a knock-down drag-out
12 / 29 / 2009

Helen Winslow Blackleft a comment

Old Mother says: "Let them eat pie!" My kids are actually posting photos of them on their Facebook pages today, in their various diminishing stages. So far, of the three, the pumpkin-squash is winning, apple's coming in second and there's a lot of mincemeat left (bit of a sophisticated taste). Here's something to enjoy with your leftovers today, and don't forget to kiss the chef!

The Trashy Novel Corp replied:

Love this story.
11 / 27 / 2009

Helen Winslow Blackleft a comment

Eggnog all around! As a Preferred Humor Provider you get five stars even though I can't find the word "chef" as a verb in the OED. Did you invent this fun word or am I just not up on the latest? Thanks for the belly laughs, William.

poplop94 replied:

hello
10 / 03 / 2009

Jessica Chiangleft a comment

Glad I keep reading to the end. PS Now i want a Kiss Me I am a Chef tote.

Kaustubh Gupta replied:

tempting :)
09 / 07 / 2011

Helen Winslow Black replied:

me too. And I guess I should read all the way down my feed before posting....NOW I see what 2++ has been up to!
10 / 02 / 2009

The Trashy Novel Corpleft a comment

I never laughed so hard in my life...When he asks Mr. Clarkson what they are going to watch and he says he thinks it's baseball!!! HAHA! Good fun quick read. Takes me back to so many Thanksgivings, and ohhhhh those tricky sisters! Can't wait for the Christmas party.