DATE!

THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE

Copyright 2012 Love Systems, Inc. All Rights Reserved

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

EXERCISE 1 - PRIOR DATES
In the space below, write out how your last date (or two) went. This will be an important reference as you work through this program.

EXERCISE 2 - SELF-DIAGNOSIS
Look at Exercise 1 and write out the points in your dates where you feel you made mistakes or could have done something better. It is important to learn to diagnose your own mistakes. If you are unsure at this point, take your best guess. The idea is to get you thinking critically about your dates.

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

EXERCISE 3 - IMPROVEMENT AREAS

Now that youve discovered what went wrong in your last dates, think of areas youd like to improve in. If you need help, refer to Textbook 1. Write down at least five things youd like to correct by the end of this course. (This will be a good way to track your progress as you improve.)

EXERCISE 4 - SETTING A TIME-BRIDGE

Setting a time-bridge becomes easy once youve practiced it a few times. The good news is that you can always set the same time-bridge, even if it doesnt come true. In the space below, write out two time-bridges you can use. Make sure to describe them with sensory details and action so the girl can envision herself doing them with you. 1)

2)

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

EXERCISE 5 - FUTURE ADVENTURE PROJECTIONS
Future adventure projections are meant to be fun and flirty. In the space below, write out a couple of your own you can use. Turn to the section on Setting Up the Date in Textbook 1 for examples. 1)

2)

EXERCISE 6 - ASKING HER OUT

In the space below, follow the structure laid out and write a cheat sheet for your phone call. This will be a firm framework for you to start from. 1) Callback humor:

2) Interesting story:

3) Statement of interest:

4) Comfort story:

5) Statement of interest:

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

6) Comfort story or transition to seed:

7) Seed:

8) Her logistics:

9) T ime-bridge:

10) Hit and run:

11) End:

As your confidence and conversation skills improve, you can deviate more from this structure. In the space below, write out two possible seeds and time-bridges. Try to have them differ from one another so you have an option at both ends of the spectrum. You can use your time-bridges from Exercise 4 if you like. 1) Seed: T ime-bridge:

2) Seed: T ime-bridge:

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

EXERCISE 7 - MAINTAINING INFORMALITY
In the space below, write out the locations or activities of your last date. Last Date:

Ex. 1) Drinks at a pub - watched a band, cheap cover at the door - Informal Ex. 2) Dinner at restaurant - three-course meal, bottle of wine, two hours - Too Formal 1) 2) 3) 4) Breaking down your previous date, assess what parts you think were too formal for a first date and which parts you think worked well. Now, write out a new date. You can keep elements of your previous date if you think they are informal enough. 1) 2) 3) 4) Go over your list and think through not only the venue, but also what you will be doing at the venue and how much youll be spending. Is your date still informal? After your next date, write out the locations and activities and re-examine if they were too intense for a first date. Keep what works and change what doesnt.

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

EXERCISE 8 - TIME, PLACE, AND DAY
In the chart below, write the times that are good/bad to contact or go on date with your numbers. You can also cross out times that dont fit into your schedule as well. Girl 1 Girl 2 Girl 3 Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday

A chart like this will also help keep track of the days you take specific girls on specific dates and the space between them.

EXERCISE 9 - SENSUAL DATES IDEAS

Sensual dates are memorable dates. Can you think of two dates that inspire the senses? If your date is unique it will stand out more. Refer to page 31 of the Types of Dates chapter in Textbook 1 for examples. 1)

2) For each of those dates, write out a brief outline of how you would pitch them to a woman when asking her out. (If you need help refer to page 23 of the Setting up the Date chapter in Textbook 1 .) 1)

2)

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

EXERCISE 10 - INSPIRING HER SENSES
Creating an anchoring experience for her will keep you on her mind. In the space below, create three anchoring experiences that you can slip into any date. (For examples, turn to page 31 of Types of Dates in Textbook 1 .) 1) 2) 3)

Look at your examples and jot down what part of your date plan these could fit into. (Turn to page 28 of Textbook 1 for more on date plans.)

EXERCISE 11 - SOCIAL CIRCLE DATES

Think of one regular activity you do within your social circle and think of how you can bring your date into it. List three ways that you can accommodate her into the evening and make her feel a part of your circle. (For an example, refer to page 32 of the Types of Dates chapter in Textbook 1 .) If you do not have a regular activity within your social circle that accommodates this plan, list some ideas for social circle activities that are fun for you and that would be good for dates. Consider pursuing these as an addition to your lifestyle. 1. a. b. c.

2. a. b. c.

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

EXERCISE 12 - YOUR WORLD DATES
Consider two major tenets of your lifestyle and think of how you could bring your date into them. List three ways that you could include her into each tenet. (For an example, refer to page 34 of the Types of Dates chapter in Textbook 1 .) If you feel that it is not possible to accommodate your date into a major tenet of your lifestyle, think of a more tangential part of your lifestyle that would be good for dates. 1. 2. a. b. c. a. b. c.

EXERCISE 13 - HIGH VALUE DATES

High value dates work well but take work to ensure. In the space below, write out three places you already have, or would like to have, high value. (If you are unsure what a high value location could be, refer to page 36 of the Types of Dates chapter in Textbook 1 .) 1)

2)

3) Now that you know the locations for high value dates, write down the people at these locations youll have to befriend to gain status. If you dont know whom you should befriend, start going

10

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

to the venue and taking names of people working there and write them in the spaces below. Generally, the higher they rank in the venue, the better they are to know. 1)

2)

3) Lastly, some days/nights are better than others for befriending staff. For instance, a Friday night is usually too busy for you to chat with the manager of a bar. However, he may be more available on a Wednesday. In the space below, write the best times to work your venues so you can schedule them into your week. 1)

2)

3)

EXERCISE 14 - BAR HOPPING DATES

Pick three venues that would be good for bar hopping. If you can, try to make them in close proximity to one another. Most importantly, have one that is close to your house. 1) 2) 3)

11

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

Of these three, find one you would like to combine with your high value date and put a star beside it. Go back to Exercise 13 and add it in if it isnt already there.

EXERCISE 15 - SECOND DATES

In the space below, write out two low-key examples of second date spots. You dont necessarily need three locations like you do for first dates. (Refer to page 40 of the Types of Dates chapter in Textbook 1 for examples.) 1)

2)

For each location, write out an activity or plan for what youll do. 1)

2)

Lastly, create an exit strategy or plan for escalation so you can get the girl to your bedroom. 1)

2)

12

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

EXERCISE 16 - CONVEYING IDENTITY TRAITS
Conveying identity is easy once you have the proper dress, style, etc. The hard part is putting your ensemble together. Since fashion and trends are always changing, you should keep an eye out for whats trendy and whats not. At the same time, you need an idea of what style is right for you. This can be done by modeling yourself after somebody else. In the space below, list three people, celebrities or movie characters, whose style youd like to emulate. Think of the traits their styles enhance. These should be men who cast an image like the one you want to cast. 1)

2)

3)

Note: If you want to model rock stars or a celebrity who is a little bit outlandish, model what they wear off- stage, not while they are performing. You may be over-the-top if you model what they wear in the spotlight.

EXERCISE 17 - REFINING YOUR WARDROBE

Of the three men in the previous exercise what does their style say about them (positive and negative)? What words could you use to describe them, and what comes to mind when you first look at their clothing and style? 1)

2)

3)

13

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

Look at your list. Ask yourself if that is truly the identity you want to convey. Secondly, is this identity congruent to the lifestyle you are living? If not, you need to change your style or change your lifestyle so you become the complete package.

EXERCISE 18 - FRESHENING
A lot of freshening fixes are pretty quick. Its just a matter of putting aside the time to do them. Refer to the list in the Freshening section of Textbook 2 . Do you have to take care of any of the examples listed? Perhaps you have some of your own? In the space below write what needs to fixed and allot time in your schedule for it. 1)

2)

EXERCISE 19 - GROOMING
The biggest fix you can make for grooming is your hairstyle. Think of your favorite celebrities or characters in movies. Write down three below. 1)

2)

3)

Hop on the internet and run a search for their hairstyles. Ask yourself if the hairstyle is relevant not only to your image but also to the trends of today. (If you are unsure ask your stylist.)

14

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

Lastly, book a consultation with a hairstylist. These are free and its their job. Take in the pictures from your search and ask your stylist what would look good on you. Different facial shapes accommodate haircuts differently, so what may look good on one celebrity may not suit your face or hair type. Get the stylist to make suggestions as well.

EXERCISE 20 - DRESS
Take a look at your wardrobe and style right now. Ask yourself if it is based more on functionality or conveying identity. If its the former, you need an overhaul. Go through your closet and pick out at least three items that you know could be improved. In the space below, write what you would like to replace them with so you have an idea when you go out to buy clothes. 1)

2)

3)

Its a good idea to start with three items and incorporate new ones as the seasons change. In time, you should be buying clothes in a nice rotation.

EXERCISE 21 - PREPARING YOUR PLACE

Before your next date, check that you have done the following: ___ ___ ___ Clean bathroom Only one couch to sit on in living room Only bed is free to sit on in bedroom

15

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

___ ___ ___ ___ ___ Clothes in hamper No clocks in sight Blinds are down in bedroom W ine (red and white) and vodka Condoms stashed in various locations

EXERCISE 22 - FIRST LOCATIONS

Using the guidelines in the First Locations section of the Preparing and Planning textbook, write down three possible first date locations for your date. 1) 2) 3)

EXERCISE 23 - SECOND LOCATIONS

Using the guidelines in the Second Locations section of the Preparing and Planning textbook, write down three possible second date locations for your date. 1) 2) 3)

EXERCISE 24 - THIRD LOCATIONS

Using the guidelines in the Third Locations section of the Preparing and Planning textbook, write down three possible third date locations for your date. 1)

16

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

2) 3)

EXERCISE 25 - WHO
In the space below, write out a couple of people who can provide you with social proof during your dates. Try to coordinate one person to a location from Exercises 22, 23, and 24. 1) 2)

Next, write out how these people can provide you with social proof or what sort of access they may provide you during the date. 1) 2)

EXERCISE 26 - SKETCHING OUT YOUR DATE

Using the example from the Example Of A Basic Date Plan box on page 21 of the Preparing and Planning chapter in Textbook 1 as a reference, sketch out a timeline for your date.

17

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

EXERCISE 27 - SELLING YOUR DATE
Looking at your sketch from Exercise 26, write down some sensory details about each location that you can use to upsell them to your date. These should be engaging details, not logical facts. Turn to the Selling the Event section of the Preparing and Planning textbook for an example. 1. 2. 3. a. b. a. b. c. a. b. c.

EXERCISE 28 - SETTING STANDARDS

In the space below, list at least 8 qualities you expect a woman you date to have. For each quality, give a meaning. If you want an adventurous woman, it will imply that she is open to trying new things. Beneath each quality write a brief anecdote of how youll set this frame or give an example of a story. All of the qualities you list should be desired in a woman you date long term. Circle the qualities that only matter for women you date casually. This will help you determine which women are suitable for a serious relationship and which ones are best to keep casual. Example: Adventurous - Shell be open to trying new things - Ill set this by telling a story. I love to go climbing on the weekends. Its pretty much my favorite activity and Im always looking for new spots. Im always up for an adventure. Are you an outdoor girl?

18

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

EXERCISE 29 - DEFINING BOUNDARIES

On the next page, list 5 qualities you will not tolerate from the women you date. For each quality, give a meaning. If you will not tolerate a woman who is constantly negative, it will imply that she brings you down and sucks energy from you. Beneath each quality write a brief anecdote of how youll set this frame or give an example of a story. Beside each quality, write whether or not its a deal breaking hard boundary or a soft boundary. For a woman you seriously date, you must hold up your soft and hard boundaries. For women you date casually, you cant expect them to adhere to all of your soft boundaries. Recognizing this before you start dating will cause less frustration later. Example: Negative - She will drag me down when I hang out with her for extended periods - Ill set this boundary by refusing to engage in negative conversation, and if she persists I will tell her we need to talk about something more positive. This is a soft boundary because I wont be hanging out with casual dates enough to let it affect me and I dont want to let negative people be involved in my day-to-day life.

19

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

20

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

EXERCISE 30 - THE MAGICAL WHAT IF
In the space below think of the potential outcomes from the situations listed using the magical what if. Write out contingencies for each situation so you know how to deal with them when they arise. Circle the best outcome. After each date, write at least one situation you get into where the magical what if would have served you well then figure out a contingency for the next time. Example Q: What if she shows up late?

A: I sit tight at my house and think She must really want to impress me by making sure she is getting ready. I stay relaxed until she comes and feel at ease. A: I get angry and let it affect me. In turn, she thinks I overreact and the date goes badly. A: I use this as an opportunity to make sure my house is clean. When she shows up, I tease her by saying, You look gorgeous, but you didnt have to spend all night getting ready for me and give her a hug.

Q1: What if I ask her to come back to my place for (a glass of wine, to see the view, show her my website, etc.)? A:

Q2: What if I try to kiss her? A:

Q3: What if she flakes on me with a legitimate excuse? A:

21

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

Q4: What if the bar we were going to go to is closed? A:

Q5: What if she says, We shouldnt be doing this, when were in bed? A: YOUR QUESTIONS:

EXERCISE 31 - INSPIRING COMPLIMENTS

Think of the last woman you went on a date with, or pay close attention to one you meet tomorrow. Look at the details of her dress, hair, style. Think of three inspiring compliments you could give her based on her appearance. Story 1: I always wanted to be a fashion designer, so I moved to New York because that is where the best schools are for it. I didnt like the city at first, but I dont think I could ever leave now. Compliments:

I think its great youve followed your goals. There arent many people who can actually stick with their goals when the going gets tough. I admire driven people. Story 2: I went backpacking in Asia a few years ago with my sister. Its great because everything in Thailand is so cheap... I dont know, I just always thought the culture over there was so cool and I loved the beaches. I think I want to go to Australia next.

22

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

Compliments:

Ive done a lot of travelling too. I find when you travel you become more open-minded. Im a sucker for adventurous types because they are always trying new things. Its boring when two people just sit around watching TV. -

EXERCISE 32 - FRAMING
Sometimes you have a short moment of time to insert frames into a conversation. If you miss this opportune moment you may not get it again or have to force it, which is never good. For the stock lines below, write down scenarios from a past date when you could have used them to set a frame. Youre a player, arent you? Example: When she brings up a story or complains about another guy. 1) 2)

Youre trouble. Ive got to watch out for you. 1) 2)

So many girls think that I can just be won over on the first date, but the hard part is actually keeping me interested. I just have high standards so it takes somebody special.

23

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

1) 2) We need to find her a nice guy - a PG-13. I know you should be with a nice guy. A guy who will buy you flowers. Be there when you come home and cook dinner for you. 1) 2)

EXERCISE 33 - LEADING
Think of the last date that you went on. Was there a time when you hesitated or let your date take the lead? In the space below, write down three times that you gave up the lead when you had a chance. 1) 2) 3)

Now, for each of those times, write out what led up to you not taking the lead and what thoughts were going through your head. 1) 2) 3)

24

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

Lastly, for the typical date you go on, write down what you should have done, or what you can do next time and what outcome it will produce. 1) 2) 3)

Take a second to visualize these outcomes thoroughly. That way they will be embedded in your mind so you can catch them in the moment on your next date.

EXERCISE 34 - KEEP IT CASUAL

Keeping it casual often involves keeping in the moment, but this can be tough when you are trying to create a plan. In the space below, write some examples of how you can find out things about her while still making the conversation seem spontaneous. Example 1) If I want to know if she has travelled, Ill talk about my recent trip to Tokyo and then ask if she has travelled. If she has, Ill compliment her on being adventurous. Example 2) My second location for the date will be a sports bar. This will be a good time to ask her if she has played any sports. It will also allow me to talk about how I play soccer. 1)

2)

3)

4)

5)

25

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

EXERCISE 35 - RE-SPARK ATTRACTION
In the space below, write down a role-play and one quick attraction story you can tell to inject life into the beginning of your date. Role-play 1)

Story 1)

EXERCISE 36 - QUALIFYING HER

In the space below, write down 10 qualities you desire in a woman with whom youre entering a sexual relationship. These can include personality traits, passions, ambitions, and sexual tastes. Refer to the Qualifying Her section of the On the Date textbook for examples. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10.

26

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

EXERCISE 37 - RECOGNIZING QUALIFICATION
Now that youve defined the qualities youre looking for, in the space below write out how youll recognize them. Go beyond the obvious She agrees with what I say for qualities she displays without her consciously acknowledging them. Refer to the examples in the Qualify Her section of the On the Date textbook. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10.

EXERCISE 38 - DISPLAYING QUALITIES

If you want to show your best qualities, ones that should be filtered through the attraction switches, you need to know what they are before you attempt to display them. In the space below, write your five best qualities. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5.

27

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

Next, write how you will display these qualities. These could be through a story, showing her evidence of them, or having other people acknowledge them in you indirectly. In the space below, write a way you will display each quality: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5.

EXERCISE 39 - ABOUT HER

If you are dating, especially if you are interested in finding a long-term partner, you must know what things you value in a partner. In the space below, write at least five things you require in a partner. These could be anything from having a certain level of education to not having any kids. Star the ones that are deal breakers. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. For each of those qualities, write out how you will find out if she possesses them below. These could be through asking questions or through certain clues she gives. Know what youre going to look for. 1. 2. 3.

28

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

4. 5.

EXERCISE 40 - FREEZING UP
Everybody runs out of things to say on a date. While being comfortable with some silence is a good thing, not being able to hold a conversation is a bad thing. This is why it is good to have a panic line to avoid extended silences. In the space below, write two lines or questions that you can use as your default when you completely run out of things to say. 1. 2. These lines should get the ball rolling. It is also a good idea to have a universal topic you can freely talk about (that isnt the weather or the news). Below, write a topic or story you can easily bring up when you have nothing to say during a date. If it can relate to your line or question above, even better. 1. 2.

EXERCISE 41 - MENTALITIES
Take a second to think of all of your beliefs about sex - good, bad, limiting, and empowering. Write them all below. 1) 2) 3)

29

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

4) 5) Look at your list and think back to where these beliefs first came from. Are they yours or are they those of your parents, friends, upbringing, etc.? This may take a while, but you can often discover where they first came from by meditating on their origins. Once you discover the roots of those beliefs, examine if they are helping your end game or hindering it. If its the latter, write an empowering belief in the space below to replace it.

EXERCISE 42 - PLAUSIBLE DENIABILITY

The best part about creating excuses for plausible deniability is that they are often not too difficult and they dont have to be too serious. Write out two excuses below. One should be a go to that you can use any time. (Go to the Plausible Deniability section of the End Game textbook to see examples.) 1) 2) Take those excuses and give a brief lead up to how you will weave them into conversation. If this seems difficult to you, make it a he said/she said like on page 21 of the End Game chapter in Textbook 3 . 1) 2)

30

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

EXERCISE 43 - FRAMING TO PREVENT LMR
Think back to your last date. How well did you create sexual frames? Think of the places youll go and the activities youll do on your next date. (If you dont have a plan yet, go to page 21 of the Preparing and Planning chapter in Textbook 2 for date ideas.) In the space below, set some goals for what sexual frames youd like to set by the time you leave that location. You will probably want playful ones early in the date and more explicit ones by the end of your second location. Be specific in what youll say or do to set them so you know what youre going to do on your date. 1) 2) 3) This is a simple exercise to do, but it can be challenging to meet these goals on your date. You should eventually get to the point where you intuitively know how early and how intensely you can set frames throughout your date.

EXERCISE 44 - BUILDING A GROUNDING ROUTINE

Before you can create an entire grounding story you need to identify its three major parts where you came from, where you are now, and where you are going. These three elements should connect to create the foundation of your story. They must tie in together. Past) Present) Future) Next, take those foundational elements and weave in the details. Make sure the details are

31

DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE - WORKBOOK

ones that shape the journey between the main elements. For an example of this, turn to page 24 of the End Game chapter in Textbook 3 to see how playing baseball transitions into learning computer programming.

32