3/19/2014

The five regrets

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MARCH 19, 2014

The five regrets

June 23, 2011 by Paulo Coelho

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Paulo Coelho
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(One of my friends here sent me a link while commenting on Insult the dead. I checked it and I stumbled upon a very interesting text by Bonnie Ware. Below a resume: )

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For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives.
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When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five: 1. I w ish I d h ad th e co u rag e to live a life tru e to myself, n o t th e life o th ers ex p ected o f me. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realize, until they no longer have it. 2. I w ish I d id n t w o rk so h ard . This came from every male patient that I nursed. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence. 3. I w ish I d h ad th e co u rag e to ex p ress my feelin g s. Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result. 4. I w ish I h ad stayed in to u ch w ith my frien d s. Often they would not truly realize the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying. 5. I w ish th at I h ad let myself b e h ap p ier. This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realize until the end that happiness is a choice.
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They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called comfort of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again. TO READ THE FULL ARTICLE, CLICK HERE

O n lin e Bo o ksto re HER E

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Comments
T he five re gre ts s ha ro ns ha m m a h s a ys : August 31, 2012 at 1:49 pm

[...] The five regrets. Share this:TwitterFacebookMoreLinkedInEmailPrintLike this:LikeBe the first to like this. [...]

N ina Co rre a s s a ys : May 29, 2012 at 10:00 pm

Hola Paulo, me imagino que recibiras correos cada segundo del dia, asi que de ante mano se que sera practicamente imposible que leas todos tus correospero lo voy a intentar de todos los
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modosquizas tenga suerte. Estoy tratando de empezar mi tesis doctoral en literatura con la Universidad de Valencia. Desde que lei por primera vez El Alquimista decidi que haria mi tesis sobre tu obra y por eso me gustaria ponerme en contacto contigo. Mi correo es ninaracha@yahoo.com. Si puedes dedicarme unos minutos de tu vida, te aseguro que me harias estar dando saltos de alegria durante los proximos cien anos. Sinceramente, Nina Correas

na s udi s a ys : May 13, 2012 at 9:34 am

feelings and love-are the engines of this life

Gya ne s hw a r s a ys : May 11, 2012 at 6:53 pm

really true i we should realize these things as soon as possible if we really want to enjoy our life

L e tiz ia s a ys : May 9, 2012 at 8:34 am

I would have regret number 3: I wish Id had the courage to express my feelings.

m rm s a ys : May 8, 2012 at 7:55 am

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ur words urges me to smile ,v nice job paulo

Ibti s a ys : May 8, 2012 at 12:05 am

.*.* .* You

M a ria s a ys : May 7, 2012 at 8:46 pm

Paulo, tem um vdeo q resume bem as fases. mto fofinho, com uma girafa. No sei se t dando pra postar links aqui, mas vou deixar de qq jeito ok. Bjo, Deus te ilumine As 5 fases da areia movedia pela girafa

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a rc hi ba ra nw a l s a ys : May 7, 2012 at 5:48 pm

how well m i able to connect.. :)

Ibti s a ys : May 7, 2012 at 4:59 pm

Dear Paulo, I believe that Life is a destiny, but Happiness is a choice the wisest of all choices; wiseness is not a way, but it is the only way which leads to live in peace Thank you for the meaningful story, and allow me to add one of your best sayings. Live with no regrets, and love with no excuses. (Aleph) Life is transient, and those few words are more than enough for life Much luv!

Chris tia ne T s o uo - Ha rve y s a ys : May 7, 2012 at 3:11 pm

I am working on those 5 points every day and I am getting ready to die when its my time Someone said your whole life you learn out to die

N a da s a ys : May 7, 2012 at 7:04 am

Lana del rey reminds me of your books, they work in harmony together. especially born to die wi Brida. Up until now I read 4 of your books, starting the 5 and Im planning to read the rest of them. Thank you for you wise words, Books make you forget about life, but yours is one of a kinds, its a mixture of reality, Cultures , Information and Imagination. I am a painter bdw, so Also your books go in harmony with my own themes.
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Ra que l s a ys : May 6, 2012 at 12:41 pm

La felicidad parece una opcin cuando se tiene todo. Cuando se vive en un mundo de sombras no hay opcin. Las tormentas te arrastras como si fueras un maniqu. La energa del universo te jala a un polo mientras que la negra te ata al dolor. Aqu radica la posibilidad de utilizar tus poderes para salir del ocaso y convertirte en sol. Es una batalla difcil de lograr pero no imposible, a seguir caminando por los bosques de la vida.

Julia s a ys : May 6, 2012 at 8:16 am

I think it is not too late for all of us who read that article :) Lets learn from mistakes of others

Andre a W yc is k s a ys : May 5, 2012 at 8:22 pm

My comments expressed on this in my picture: http://www.facebook.com/photo.php? fbid=183242908463774&set=a.176002545854477.36547.111798882274844&type=3&theater

L ily s a ys : May 5, 2012 at 7:47 pm

its true, really i apreciate all the publications of coelho, cause this help to me in moments that i feel confusion, the warrior of ligth is one of books that i love so much. i want to know about more reflections!!! thak you

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M uha m m a d Ka m ra n s a ys : May 5, 2012 at 5:47 pm

Really true. I am living my life according to my wishes uptill now and by tha grace of Allah, I will live the rest like it. Be happy

Arto Hutto s a ys : May 5, 2012 at 2:59 pm

In Swedish: Om du dr imorgon: kommer du d i frid? Hr r 5 klassiska nger 1. Jag nskar jag haft mod att leva ett liv sant fr mig sjlv, inte ett liv andra frvntade sig av mig. 2. Jag nskar jag inte arbetat s hrt. 3. Jag nskar jag haft modet att uttrycka mina knslor. 4. Jag nskar jag hllit kontakten med mina vnner. 5. Jag nskar jag hade ltit mig sjlv vara lyckligare. http://www.facebook.com/PauloCoelhoSverige

fa rve s a ys : May 5, 2012 at 1:31 pm

yeah ur righti think i must rock my world :)

Bra nka s a ys : May 5, 2012 at 9:17 am

All Ive done 1 to 4

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I regret that I did not fully 5 I always did what I wanted and loved, I did not care for gossip and criticism (f not helpful) I am working hard but I left that job because I had no life, I gave birth and I am unemployed and I am happy alwAll the friends I have lost the war (we were in contact) I found through facebook and I was happy, there are still few that I have seen and heard But I was always striving to better and bigger because I was not too happy that I enjoyed rather than in what God has given me now I try to straightenays express their feelings whatever it may be, love, fear all

CAT HAL BY RN E s a ys : May 5, 2012 at 9:09 am

I CANT SAY THAT I HAVE NO REGRETS BUT THE FIVE LISTED ARE NOT AMONG MINE AND I KNOW THAT THAT MAKES ME A VERY LUCKY MAN. I FEEL THAT A LOT OF PEOPLE I KNOW WILL REGRET NOT DOING OR TRYING THINGS AND YET I AM OCCASIONALLY CASTIGATED BY THESE SAME PEOPLE FOR THE LIFE I LIVE. LIFE IS THE MOST PRECIOUS GIFT WE HAVE AND TO MY MIND, THE GREATEST SIN AGAINST GOD AND AGAINST OURSELVES IS TO NOT LIVE IT TO THE MOST. GOOD LUCK !!!

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Otilia Coelho London, United Kingdom One life... Thats all we get... Live and let live. Reply Like Daniel Mansour I recently finished making a documentary about this very subject. It's called The Final Word, such an enlightening/amazing experience. Here is a link to the trailer if you're keen to check it out... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0PvxsXI94lk Reply Like 2 Follow Post Edited February 4 at 4:19am
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Julie Ray Brand Partner at Nerium International Just watched your trailer ... beautiful. Where will this be shown? Reply Like February 12 at 6:59am Daniel Mansour Julie Ray Thanks for checking the trailer out Julie! I'm very proud of the film. It has screened here in Australia and now we are looking at the festival circuit internationally. Hopefully it'll be on international screens soon. The more people we can get it out to the better so please feel free to share it with everyone! Reply Like February 13 at 7:42am Julie Ray Brand Partner at Nerium International OK, I've posted it on my page. Every little bit helps :) Reply Like Rosanna Manalo Am a lover of your books...i've realized significant lessons today. I am guilty of number 1 and 3 but not too late for me to change regrets into happiness---break the chain and take the chance to be happy:)) Reply Like 1 Follow Post February 4 at 2:46pm Follow Timioara, Romania 1 February 13 at 8:00am

Badoiu Valentin

Even if you do all the above, you still have regrets. So, i think in the end it's best to live the life :) Reply Like 1 Follow Post February 4 at 12:25am

Grs Murthy Works at LIC OF INDIA i am fine on 2 , 4, and 5.. have to get to 1 and 3 Reply Like 1 Follow Post February 5 at 10:46am

Eviano George Administrator at Zinovi Educational Foundation Word! Reply Like 1 Follow Post February 4 at 1:29pm

Eviano George Administrator at Zinovi Educational Foundation Marguerite Camara Moni Oloke Reply Like February 4 at 1:29pm Moni Oloke Southern New Hampshire University
http://paulocoelhoblog.com/2011/06/23/regrets/

Saw this a while ago...still a good read

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Saw this a while ago...still a good read Reply Like February 5 at 11:23am DjandSally Alverson Arroyo High #3 hit home for me (Sally), as I am sure it does many of usReply Like Follow Post February 10 at 1:51am Raul Montesa Works at MODEC International, Inc.

The five regrets

Easy for them to say for they have reached their final destination. What stops us from doing what we want to do is the fear of the unknown. We always want to do things on a safe side for us to live longer. Reply Like Follow Post February 5 at 1:23am Larysa Karpovych Ukraine I think that really interesting what conclusion people make when their life almost coming to end. Reply Like Follow Post February 5 at 2:46am Subhash Ravikanth Seela Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh Thank you. The regrets are always of things not done and decisions taken away from ones own self... Reply Like Follow Post February 4 at 7:55am Joaquin Salvador Molina Saavedra I wish I had known. Reply Like Follow Post February 5 at 9:53pm Nikita Goel Follow Writer at Blogger

Very Enlightening ! Reply Like Follow Post February 4 at 1:03am Milad Mas Works at Photography on Facebook GOD IS THE AVENGER Reply Like Follow Post February 4 at 3:46am Kamar Cheval WILL TRY Reply Like Follow Post February 4 at 12:29am Priyankush Jain simply ur's....
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simply ur's.... Reply Like Follow Post December 16, 2012 at 7:48am Ingrid Perk Selecta, kweek A o soo good. Reply Like Follow Post November 22, 2012 at 4:14am Top Commenter Moscow, Russia

The five regrets

You have always a chance to do what you really have as a tought. So if you want to do something. Just do it. And think of it. For actions are toughts in motion. Keep moving forward on the right direction. The wrong direction will show you the right one. Reply Like 1 Follow Post February 4 at 12:34am Top Commenter IEEM

Maria Angelica Espinoza Rojas

no se que decir.-lo interpreto como una eleccion de vida.ENCONTRE COBARDE A LA GIRAFA,,,SI ESTOY EQUICOCADA ACEPTA MI IGNORANCIA,.creo que mucho de lo osados que somos se debe al exito..- siempre .-llevo una frase y es.- quien no se arriesga no cruza el rio. jajajaja no deseo ponerme tragica...pesada ni nada que se paresca.- Soy una persona que recorre el mundo ...que me gusta el idioma Portugues...frances e italiano y nada aca estoy trabajando y diciendo lo que siento sin saber porque. los quiero mucho a uds y a todo el mundo tierra.- Soy ......UNA SIMPLE PERSONA.. GRACIAS...GRACIAS POR TODO. ESPERO SEGUIR LEYENDO A PABLO Reply Like Follow Post February 4 at 12:44am Margarita Contreras San Carlos, Chile LA MUERTE ,MORIRNOS NOS ATERRA SI PENSRAMOS QUE LA VIDA ES SOLO UNA ILUSIN QUE SOLO SABEMOS VIVIR EN EL MUNDO FSICO , SI APRENDIRAMOS A VIVIR EN EL PRESENTE DANDO EN TODO Y PARA TODO SI ESCUCHRAMOS CON NUESTROS CINCO SENTIDOS AL OTRO YA ESTARAMOS DANDO EL SOLO HECHO DE COMPRAR UNA NECESIDAD NUESTRA CON EL DINERO QUE ENTREGAMOS YA ESTAMOS DANDO AL OTRO QUE LO NECESITA EL DINERO FLUYE SOLO TENEMOS QUE HACERLO CON AMOR NO CON EL EGOSMO DE COMPRAR LO QUE NECESITAMOS TODO ES DAR SI PUSIRAMOS ATENCIN A LAS QUEJAS O DOLENCIAS DE NUESTRO CUERPO ESTARAMOS ATENDIENDO A NUESTRAS VERDADERAS NECESIDADES DIOS NOS CREO CON AMOR Y ENERGA QUE FLUYE APRENDAMOS A OBSERVAR CON EL TERCER OJO QUE ES EL DE LA SABIDURA Y ESPERAREMOS LA MUERTE DICIENDO VIDA NADA TE DEBO VIDA NADA ME DEBES Reply Like Follow Post February 4 at 1:25am Beatriz Vzla Uff! Perfecto! Totalmente de acuerdo! Reply Like Follow Post February 4 at 12:34am Adriana Campos
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There was a time I lived the life others expected of me, but not anymore. Thank God I

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The five regrets There was a time I lived the life others expected of me, but not anymore. Thank God I broke my chains and the feeling I get at realizing this is crystal clear joy.

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