Vipers & ScorpionsBy: Stephen Kilijanczyk A Christian satire of the American bipartisan political system, expressed through theGospel of Jesus Christ.Chapter 1
Preaching of John the Baptist
Before the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ, Isaiah the prophet wrote:“Behold, I am sending my messenger ahead of you; he will prepare your way. A voice of one crying out in the desert: ‘Prepare the way of the Lord, make straight his path.’ ”A man named John the Baptist appeared in the Mojave Desert proclaiming a baptism of repentance for the forgiveness of sins. People from the West Coast and all the inhabitantsof Las Vegas were going out to him and being baptized in Lake Tahoe. John was clothedin grizzle bear hair and wore a black leather belt around his waist. He fed off of wildhoney and insects. And he proclaimed this message to all those who would hear: “Onemightier than I is coming after me. I am not worthy to stoop and loosen the clasp of hissandals. I have baptized you with water; he will baptize you with the Holy Spirit.”
The Baptism of Jesus
It happened in those days that Jesus came from the City of Salt Lake, within Utah andwas baptized in Lake Tahoe by John. On coming up out of the water he saw the heavens being torn open and the Spirit, like a dove, descending upon him. And voice came fromheaven, “You are my beloved Son; with you I am well pleased.”
The Temptation of Jesus
At once the Spirit drove him out into the desert, and he remained in the desert for fortydays, tempted by Satan. He was among wild beasts, and the angels ministered to him.
The Beginning of the West Coast Ministry
After John had been arrested, Jesus came to California proclaiming the gospel of God:“This is the time of fulfillment. The kingdom of God is at hand. Repent, and believe inthe gospel.”
The Call of the First Disciples
As he was passing through Los Angeles he stopped at the Los Angeles ConventionCenter, he saw Simon and his brother Andrew holding an open casting call; they wereTalent Agents. Jesus said to them, “Come after me, and I will make you Agents of God.Then they left their booth and followed him.” He walked along a little further and sawJames, the son of Zebedee, and his brother John. They too were in agents looking for fresh talent. Then he called them. So they left their father Zebedee at the booth long withthe other employees and followed him.