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Humor 2014 Article

Humor 2014 Article

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Published by zabolotnyi61

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Published by: zabolotnyi61 on Apr 02, 2014
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11/02/2014

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EDITORIAL:
Our Traditional April 2014 Project
 
April
1, All Fools’ Day
 
This issue has been prepared by students of Group 34-Ph
Jesus!
A burglar has just made it into the house he's intending ransacking, and he's looking around for stuff to steal. All of a sudden, a little voice pipes up, "I can see you, and so can Jesus!" Startled, the burglar looks around the room. No one there at all, so he goes back to his business.
 
"I can see you, and so can Jesus!" The burglar jumps again, and takes a longer look around the room. Over in the corner by the window, almost obscured by curtains, is a cage in which sits a parrot, who pipes up again, "I can see you, and so can Jesus!"
 "
So what," says the burglar, "you're only a parrot!" To which the parrot replies, "Maybe, but Jesus is a Rottweiler!"
Presented by Oleksandra KAPUSTIAN
BLACK AND BROWN
Q: What's black and brown and looks good on a lawyer? A: A Doberman pinscher. 
By Anastasia BOGUSLAVSKA
 
Not the bee in her bonnet?
A woman asked for a meal in a restaurant. The waiter brought the food and put it on the table. After a moment, the woman called the waiter and said:
By Sabina SANGOVA
GET SOME MORE!
From the Editor-in-Chief
"Please don't speak so loudly, madam," said the waiter, "or everyone will want one." "Waiter! Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!"
 
THE BOSS
One day a man goes to a pet shop to buy a parrot. The assistant takes the man to the parrot section and asks the man to choose one. The man asks, ''How much is the red one?'' The assistant says, ''$2000.'' The man is shocked and asks the assistant why it's so expensive. The assistant explains, ''This parrot is a very special one. He knows typewriting and can type really fast.'' ''What about the green one?'' the man asks. The assistant says, ''He costs $5000 because he knows typewriting and can answer incoming telephone calls and take notes.'' ''What about the blue one?'' the man asks. The assistant says, ''That one's $10,000.'' The man says, ''What does HE do?'' The assistant says, ''I don't know, probably nothing, but the other two call him
BOSS
.''
By Anastasia BOGUSLAVSKA
Victorian Gentlemen’s Conversation
 
What is
there squelching in my shoe?“
 
Porridge, sir.
 
And what is it doing there?
 
Squelching, sir.
 By Karina KABYSH
April Fools’ Day Test:
 
IF YOU ARE 
NOT  A FOOL,
 
PRESS F13.
By Editor-in-Chief

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