An Introduction to Natural Family Planning

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An introduction to Natural FertilityAwareness

By Robert ColquhounPRAYER:Thanks be to you, our Lord Jesus ChristFor all the benefits which you have given us,For all the pains and insults which you have borne for usMost merciful Redeemer, Friend and Brother,May we know you more clearly,Love you more dearly,And followyou more nearly,Day by day. Amen. (St Richard of Chichester).

Introduction

Many people are willing to spend hundreds of hours in preparing for their own weddingday, but far less time actually preparing for their marriage. The aim of this booklet is to bring about the success of future marriages.Many people think that the Church is entirely negative about sex. The understoodmentality is, “If it feels good, then definitely don’t do it.” Few people think that actuallyfollowing the ten commandments is actually something that is going to bring themhappiness. But God has placed his clues about human sexuality all around so that our joymight be complete. When we scrutinise this topic a little closer, there are incrediblediscoveries to be made.God’s plan for love and life is almost a well kept secret these days. Marriage can behighly romantic. Couples who pray together have a higher sexual satisfaction. God’s firstcommandment is the Bible is to have sex. In Genesis 1:28 we read: “Be fruitful andmultiply.” The world does not want you to think about sex, only to dream, crave andslaver for it. God intended sex to be the marriage vows made flesh. It is possible to sayyour wedding vows with your body. These vows a promise to be free (holding nothing back), total (a true gift), faithful (exclusive and permanent) and fruitful (open to life). Theworld looks to thwart these promises, making sex restricted or forced, temporary, disloyaland sterile. The theology of the Church is not imposed on anyone, but it is the uncoveringof God’s original design. When we realise how generous God has been with us that wehave a lover, it is time to return the favour of generosity. After all, God can never beoutdone in generosity.Preparation for marriage is not something that happens several months prior to thewedding. Now is the time to build a happy and successful foundation of marriage. The beauty of purity and clarity of mind is something that holds good stead for the rest of one’s life. Trust and self control are things especially needed when both close and far from your wife. Purity with practice is certainly a challenge. To be ready for the huge gift

of one’s spouse will not leave you empty handed at the Altar, but will help you to comewith a gift to give to Jesus.Chastity is something caught not taught. Abstinence is the lack of sexual activity. In itself it is not a virtue, but simply abstaining from action. Some people might be abstinent because they have chosen to, others because they cannot get a date. It tells us little aboutthe spiritual state of a person.Chastity on the other hand is a positive virtue, to be thought only in association with love.Chastity stems from the latin adjective ‘castus’ which means pure. Chastity is aboutliving an integrated and well balanced life. It respects the fact that sex is sacred and agreat gift from God. All Christians are called to chastity, whether married, single or celibate. This great virtue gives us purity in mind, heart and conscience and prepares our souls for love. Only the chaste man and the chaste woman are capable of true love. Thisvirtue gives us self control, spiritual strength and is a certain path to happiness.Marriage is one the greatest images on earth of God’s love. St Paul states how this unionis a mystery how two become one flesh. In the Catholic Church, there are two sacramentswhere a person becomes a sacrament. In the Eucharist, Christ becomes a sacrament. Inmarriage the will of two people make a sacrament. St Francis de Sales said that marriageis the greatest form of mortification on earth. But it can be something that will save usfrom ourselves. But God soaks couples with dollops of grace in order to live outmarriage. If we are in a state of sin, we do not receive these graces in order to live outmarriage.

Erotic love poetry in the Bible: Song of songs

There is one book in the Bible that St Thomas Aquinas asked to have read to him on hisdeath bed. That books was the song of songs. One person described such writing as a book of erotic love poetry – those training to be rabbis in years past were not allowed toread the material in fear that it might offend their ears.The book starts with a yearning for an embrace: “O that you would kiss me with thekisses of your mouth!” (1:1). The writing oozes with scintillating analogies, similes andcravings as the author is ‘sick with love.’ (2:5). The imagery of love is vivid and alive asthe writer proclaims: “My beloved is like a gazelle or a young stag,” (2:9) and “Your hair is like a flock of goats, moving down the slopes of Gilead.” (4:1). The author’s heart isravished (4:9) for the sake of his beloved, whom he also calls a sister and bride. Theauthor lovingly describes his lover’s anatomy in a litany of praise, “Your neck is like anivory tower, your rounded thighs are like jewels.” (7:4, 1). For those who are reluctant toread the Bible because they perceive it to be boring, this book is the perfect introduction!OXYTOCINPowerful hormones are released in the brains of men and women that produce lasting bonds with their partner during sexual activity. The most influential hormones areoxytocin and vasopressin.

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