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Jodi-Ann Fletcher Change My Style Yo
 Just as how Rebecca needed you, I needed you but in a differentway. I didn’t need your help or you pity, what I needed from you wasto be there and tell me I was doing okay. That’s all I ever needed fromyou.” Natasja felt her jaws drop open in surprise and she had goodreason to, Brenda needed no one, she was strong, determined and un-self-conscious. “You are kidding me right?” “No, I am not, you mightnot realize it but the way you were before was good enough foreveryone around you. You were the only one who felt you needed tochange; we loved you for being you and helping out people and havingyour little sarcastic humor. It was you.” Natasja felt a different type of sadness, a nicer kind of sadness. She was sad because she was sorryshe didn’t see that she was okay.Before either of them could think of something else that neededto be said, they hugged like two sailors finding shore after a terriblestorm. They sat thereat the table, weeping in each other’s arms. Theghost was clear.
“So what are you going to do?” Natasja and Brenda walked out of SovereignCenter together. Natasja felt dazed as though too many things were happening in too littletime and her brain wasn’t able to cope with the data. “What do you mean?” Brendalooked at her sternly, the sensible, reliable friend back where she belonged. Natasjasmiled, the sun no longer shone brightly on her face, she had to correct a few mishaps.“I’m not sure how things are going to go with me but I have this friend that you mayknow and she needs me greatly,” she remarked slyly with a mischievous twinkle in her eyes. She wasn’t dead yet. Brenda smiled knowingly, “Then what are you waiting for?” Natasja really didn’t know.
February 6, 2009- commence
PART 1- Old Habits Die HardChange my style, Change my life.Change can happen easily but can you changeback?Chapter 1
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Jodi-Ann Fletcher Change My Style Yo
I kept thinking, was there ever going to be someone for me whenI grow up, is there a place for me. Will I be happy when I grow older? Ireally don’t know. I am sadly one of the few girls who don’t dream of themselves in this big fantasy wedding if I ever thought of myself marrying. I felt afraid because not everyone finds a happy ending or asunset in the wilderness. I want to be happy. I want a family, a lovinghusband, children who will love being apart of the family and be agood people. I want so much, yet I don’t know if that will be my future.I want a good job, where I make more than enough to support my family. I want all of these things; but is it possible?Some persons get so lucky yet others have it extremely hard. I don’t have a clue who I truly am but I know I want to be happy. I want tocare for people; I want to feel love, belonging, stability, and people. Iwant everything life has to offer but I am afraid I am being too greedy.I sometimes feel I have to eliminate some in order to get the others.The thing was which to keep and which to sacrifice.
Natasja wrote down everything she felt. It was hard, emotionsshe was trying to avoid, even from herself, just escaping into theendless pages of her diary. Natasja didn’t know what exactly promptedher to write about her future like that; maybe it was Valentine’s Dayand the fact that she was fourteen and didn’t have a boyfriend. It wasawkward, everyone around her seemed to have that special someone,and she had no one. Her life revolved around novels and without it, shewas lost.Looking up into the ceiling of her room, book in hand; shecontemplated life. To her way of thinking, it was
could I have this,could I have that 
, not
how could I get it 
. She thought about all thelovely things in life, all the things she didn’t have. Natasja didn’t thinkof what she had, but instead what was out their, somewhere, waitingto be taken.Rolling over on her soft pink covered bed she opened her darkpurple and black knapsack, searching for her Geography notebook.Geography was her worst subject, always had been, even when shedidn’t know she was doing it. Back then it was Social Studies which inhigh school Natasja realized were a mixture of History and Geography.Normally, she would not have paid attention to Geo at all butScience was getting too deep into Geo with all the Rock and mineralcrap and then soil. Reading all the notes she had bothered to take inclass, she was able to break down the different rock groups by the waythe rock was formed. Igneous was directly linked to intrusive andextrusive, sedimentary was chemically, organic and something elsethat was illegible.Stretching over her book, Natasja searched her bag for a bubblegum; she couldn’t survive without chewing something. Popping a pieceof the Bubblicious into her mouth she tried to concentrate. By her
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Jodi-Ann Fletcher Change My Style Yo
bedtime she had successful read over all her notes on rocks andminerals. Tomorrow she decided that she was going to make a datewith the library to look up Earthquakes.Coming out of her miniature bedroom with its blue and whitestars, she went to get ready for bed. Natasja brushed her teeth twiceas carefully as was normal, she had been experiencing some pain inone of her bottom teeth. Afterwards, she took a shower with her Suaveblueberry body wash and went to her room, closing the door behindher. She didn’t wash her face because she had enzyme problems andshe didn’t want to risk any rashes.In her room Natasja bent down over her bed with her handsclasped together. Thanking Jesus for everything he’d done for her thatday, Natasja prayed he would continue to bless and guide and protecther family. Natasja prayed for Jamaica, for those without the basicnecessities and especially those without a loved one. Getting upNatasja turned on her fan on medium, turned off the lights andwrapped up in the cover sheet.In dream world Natasja saw herself as a lawyer. She wassuccessful; people liked her for who she was even though she was alittle bitchy at times. A handsome guy with lovely eyes, they lookedgentle and intriguing, a confident attitude, romantic and kind spiritedwas head over heels in-love with her. They traveled together, he wassuccessful and all that. They had a lovely home, lots of close friends,and three children and yet they were still young. It was the perfect,ultimate dream in Natasja’s opinion and she slept with a smilesoftening her face. The next day, her foster father woke her up at five o’clock in themorning to get ready for school. Stretching her arms and legs indifferent directions and yawning, Natasja kicked and wiggled out of thesheets. Rolling out of bed she almost rolled her fan, which was besideher bed, over. Taking off her nightcap she threw it on her dresser andwalked disoriented out of her bedroom door that was half filled withthe iron board that Mrs. Sinclair was using. Her room was a dangerzone with a lot of obstacles to pass before you were able to get out.Natasja got ready for another day of school at BroderickAcademy. She brushed her teeth, ate two Kellogg’s chocolate chipswaffles, scrambled eggs and an orange, laid down while Nicole, herfoster sister, took a quick bath and etc. Natasja daily routine was longand tiring. She left the house at seven o’clock. The traffic was dreadful. The sun was out and shining straightinto her face. Looking out the window Natasja looked at the mountainsthat always seemed to be there. That was one of the best things about Jamaica, the mountains. It seemed like they, her father and her, werelate because the traffic reached as far as the entrance of hercommunity. By the time Natasja reached the toll way, she was in a
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Japooh

can someone please comment on the book? I need feedback!

reply04 / 12 / 2010
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