LADIES’ HOME oll in THINK (ee ST-CANCER SURVIVORS am BREAST-CANCER sons ros m5The best relationship remedy may | REFRESH YOUR not be a pricey getaway or couple's | LIFE PLAN therapy, says Terri Orbuch, PhO. | STEP ONE You can reinvent yourselt, says Loren Slocum, a marriage therapist and author of | author of Life Tuneups: Your Personal Plan to Find Balance, a 5 Simple Steps to Take Your Mariage | piscover Your Passion and Step Into Greatness. Design your From Good to Great. Her surprising | own ideal new life. “Think, ‘What would it look like? Who would prescription: Laugh together. ‘We're | be in it? What would | be doing on a daily basis?'* so serious thesedays—especiallynow, | STEP TWO Decide how to get there. If you envision writing a when people are concerned about | oye), think about enroling in a writing class or dasignating economic security andjob loss. Buta | 4 comer of the basement as your after-hours writing space. good marriage isnot just,'Dowehave | STEP THREE Forget the oid rules. Perhaps you tried to go back to school to become a teacher 10 years ago and couldn't ‘make it work. Don't assume the same thing will happen again. ‘Maybe there's a new grant available. You're in a different place ‘now, 80 be open to new ways to make it happen. STEP FOUR Make a daily move forward. “People ask me how I wrote my book,” Slocum says, *! worked oni litle bit every, YOUR MARRIAGE enough money to pay the rent?"" she says. Not only does laughing together relieve stress but it also helps remind the two of you what brought you together in the first place, So spend your next date night at a comedy club, snuggle on the couch for an Airplane! and This ls Spinal Tap double feature day, maybe for half an hour.” The key isnt to spend every wak- ing moment on your goal but just to be consistent or e-mail him your favorite YouTube | STEP FIVE When you reach your goal, goto LHJ.comlflist video—whatever cracks you up. to tell us your story and inspire others, EFRESH YOUR PARENTING STYLE You're trying to get things done, your kids won't leave you alone and you'd do anything for litle peace, Karen, Maezen Miller, the author of Momma Zen: Walking the Crocked Path of Motherhood, says the first step toward ‘being more patients to focus an what's happening right at thie moment, “Children are elways asking for things, aind you say, things and they say, ‘Not right now’ It's a message of resistance and conflict” she says, Because Zen is all ‘about paying attention, Miler's remedy is to give your kids ‘one hour of your undivided attention every day. ‘She sets a kitchen timer for 60 minutes and then does whatever her daughter wants—often playing Barbies. This isn'tabout getting your child to do a chosen activity, she ‘cautions, but about following her agenda. If the thought of playing dolls for an hour throws you into a panic, the timer will emind you there's a way out. Then you can relax and ive in. Do this regularly and you may find that children don't need the full hour and aren't acting up as often. If you pay attention, they won't have to misbehave to get it. Says Miller, “Ihave come to view attention as magic elixir” 2 REFRESH ‘Not right now In return, you are asking them