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Yo, what's up...so here is the unknown life or a kid brought up destroyed...I will divide my life into 4 sections: Background, my childhood, my worst days, myworst days power2.__________________________________1)Back ground:I am just a random fag yes a fag...numb as hell...but i do have lots of friendsbut i am the one who is moving far away...a.k.a random fag.I am from Egypt my fagget country full of phony and unrealistic people.I am Muslim and do believe in god.I never had a girl friend or had sex as it is forbidden.I am a 15 years old dude who never had his body builded and have maximumdepressions...i can be immature and mature...i am just a fag you know....I am not a mom's boy in fact i am the strictly opposite.I do hate my life and wants to end it but as a Muslim i cant because it'sforbidden to kill my self because god gave us our life as a test so you declinethe test you fail.I didn't have any problems as a gf cheating on my or something (even if i had agf) thanks to Islam forbidden any sexual contact except between 2 married girl andboy...this also helped me._________________________________2)My child hood age 1~11.As a normal kid i was born in a medium economical level in Egypt near thepyramids, my father is an programmer and my mother a normal salary counter...My life was not a bad one but i have to say there were something in the inner ofme telling me it will be a bad life or just i can't look except in the darkest ofmy life.Mainly, normal kids in Egypt goes to a sports club so they can grow up in asporting and social life but i couldn't manage to go there as my economical stateswas bad (i mean my father was not that rich).He only concentrated on my schoolingsystem which is the worst thing in my life (You will know why in the 2nd and the3rd chapters).He used to beat me in the age of 6 hardly because my English grammarmistakes, however, i didn't learn English by his way and he failed to teach meEnglish by beating me but he helped me to get my A* tests till my age were 8 mymother was pregnant again. these days were my worst, so as my mother had to leaveme for a while with my father so he can teach me all about the subjects and istarted to study on my own from the age of 9 years old (NOTE schooling in Egyptleads to suicidal problems in later ages as it is so hard, pointless, and tiringand who fails in it fails in his job/economical state/social life...this means aman got 1 chance to build he future, he fails, he failed in his life).However iwere treated badly, bad enough for a 8 years old, i do remember my self in mystinky clothes and my smelly body and so were my father, he used to work as atransported in his young ages and sleep in the trunk or a random nests for peoplein Egypt so he took on the hardest life, he used to yell at my mother a lot andwhen ever they want to settle it out my aunts/uncles must interrupt the fight and

bring them back to normal then they blame it on my birth day as problems showed upafter my birth, in fact my mother is so paranoid, she always get's worried if mytemperature went 1 Celsius degree more, she used to panic hardly and my father whotook on the random life used to get annoyed he just said let it go and he will bealright and she used to get so so much worried and sit sad which was not admiredfrom my father...they made many problems he told me when i were 8 to look afterher and he said "I know you may be so young for it, but i will divorce her soon"how ever he didn't, he just continued his life with her, badly done....he used tobeat me till i were 12 years old...then he stopped and then i realized who am iand what am i and what is a person...you, my reader may not understand what i domean, i mean: from the age 1~11 i didn't go out of my house except rarely..iwitnessed every fight of my mom and dad, how ever i used to ignore it but godknows how i felt... as this child hood i spent my summer holidays (yes my goodpart in my life right?)masturbating like 1~5 times a day (i didn't know what isthat) or camping on Counter strike as a computer nerd in a new flat but in thesame building of my home (my father is the owner of my home so one of the guys whorented the flat died and my father got it back so i went to live there alone...ihated to live in my home due to increasing yelling between my mother and fatherand young brother..he is just repeating my life...but worst...as my father now is1000 times worst than the past times)._____________________________3)My worst years in my life12~14.Coming out from the primary school to my preparatory school, i knew nothing ofstreets as i didn't use to go to clubs or any other place than my aunt and myschool and my home.My first mistake was that i changed from my school to another one and it didaffect me as i was like unknown guy and they had some rude community till youapprove yourself, how ever i were a good dude there, my first friend there hadexactly the same name of mine..how ironic we both share the same name but he is myopposite...he is the most successful dude in school now, as he have lots offriends and most of them are girls, in my age of 12 i didn't show interest exceptin girls, which used to ignore me as i am an unknown guy in the school...One day i loved a girl (was the first time in my life) she knew but i guess sherepelled me in a cute way...she loved my friend but he ignored here...i had a hardyear regardless it is the best school year till now...looking back when i wasyoung i wanted to decide which school year is the best for me but...nothing wasgood all sux.My friend and only one this year was like the big dude of our classes and he usedto check me so often i mean he showed some care about stuff about me (No homo)...iknew then they all share a certain club but i couldn't join there as my fathereconomical life is bad very bad...(i didn't mention some days we had to eat somerandom shit like wet bread as break fast/lunch and there were no dinner...) onlygod knows why we had so bad economics may be he used to spend on stuff that werenothing important (We have 3 computers in home he thinks it his lab lol...he isliving in his imagination).this was the first year in my prep school the summer was worst...by this time ifelt i am so ignored in my life...i started to have my depression in the advancelevels (yes i had depression from the age of 10 near the period i used tomasturbate...) i spent this summer exploring the internet and still masturbatingbut on porn tube and adult movies...so my friends in the new school didn't see methey just ignored me....(oh i forgot to tell every cool activity in my school usedto be shut down by my father as he said"Stop wasting your time and go memorize

your stuff")my father used to call me 3 words only (Worthless) (Stupid) (Decisiveguy) as he thought i was pretended to be an depressed guy...lol...yeah i am adecisive dude who pretended this... -_-"Second year came up, my spirit were bad from the summer and the school work was sohard i used to memorize like 5 books to pass the year (each book 100+ pages)...atthis period i knew the rap music and used to build my English skills in summerfrom the internet, i was introduced to Eminem's rap songs and they really remindedme by similar dark days in my life so i guess i am one of his fans.I used to go to school every day, make my home works at nigh i used to make my dayupside down i go to school from 8am to 3 am then 1 hour to return to home so 4 amin home i used to eat in 1 hour as i am watching t.v. then i go to sleep from 5 amto 12 am then wake up from 12 am so sleepy already but i was forced to do my homeworks and memorize stuff..day after day week after week from my age of 8 til now iam doing this...same shit different day but the sh!t is so hard now as i mustmemorize like 10 books each 200 page+ (school in Egypt ftw huh?) anyway let meconcentrate on this year...i passed from this year hardly summer came i did so badas the last summer nerd on comp 24hours in the day in my prison (my room in theother flat)..._____________________________4)Hardcore life late 14~15.3rd year (Last year) of the prep school is almost here, this year is differentwhy? because in Egypt there are some years that needs some special work the lastyear in the primary school and I've passed it with 98.9% so i joined a decent prepschool (studying level).the last year in the preparatory school so i can join adecent high school and the last 2 years of high school need's work to join adecent college if i failed in this 2 years i will not join a college this means iwill not have a decent job in my cursed country so my life will fail...as if it isnot a fail -_-anyway, the previous 2 years i used to memorize my books but just to pass theyear, this year i must memorize my stuff so i can get a 95%+... nothing specialabout this year except that i planed in my summer holiday i will do stuff i willjoin a gym and start to build my body...after all my nerd wanted to be a properhuman being...but oh i passed my exams with 93.3% ( FAIL FAIL FAIL) of course iwill fail (not to mention my ill treatment of my father, i used to live alone andhave my food brought from the main flat some days i had no food he always used toyell at me as the worthless human being...well i kinda agree with him now...i amjust a waste of oxygen and waste of food and waste of every thing. summer holidaycame, i wanted to join stuff and go to gym and stuff all these stuff neededmoney...my father used to frustrates me...he succeeded i camped on my comp...butthis time i was aware of what i am doing, and i was aware of my waste of mytime..but i didn't want to face my self...so my day in any summer holiday was likethat: from 1 am to 11 am ( all the night) i am playing some stupid mmorpg gamesfrom 11am to 12am sleeping and this 1 hour left for eating and stuff...all of thisin my prison (my room)...i knew about my stuff and i was so aware of my doomedlife...till the day came of the new year of the school...i am still in the sameschool but every thing changed now many of my friends are not there, and my friend(the dude who shares my name) ignores me since the 2nd year of prep so as most ofthe players in my school (Who hang out with girls)...lol...1st year secondary (1st year in my high school)(15 years old) ok this is when mylife story ends....i am in the 3rd week in the 1st year secondary same stuffdifferent year but this time i have many suicidal thoughts as my father treats meworst and worst and my studying is going too bad, i just escaped my exam due to my