It seemed to dance in and again my world was bright. I pondered the idea of rising. Eachand every new day made it less and less more reasonable to embrace the ambiguity of existence. Some would say that existence is the farthest thing from ambiguity, but I haveto disagree. Ambiguity and existence are practically synonyms, in my eyes, and thosewho think differently aren’t free thinkers at all and, therefore, merely waste their existence in a blind state of unknown ambiguity. When you learn to see throughambiguity and obtain true eyesight the world often resembled a lollypop, spherical andsugarcoated. To crunch away to the sugar center would be to abolish order and reason aswe know it, but what do we really know. This world is run by its politics, but when youlook at the big picture, politics is nothing but an opinion. Opinions. They are nothing butunstable favored ideals, yet we base a civilization on them. I have never been able tocomprehend any other life form, their actions, or their business besides myself. And eventhen, with myself, I sometimes don’t understand. God, heaven, angels, space, universes,galaxies, solar systems, planets, continents, countries, politics, politicians, civilians, parents, daughters, sons; who am I? Where do I fall? I am human. I am male. I like beingalone and reading. I like driving at night in artificially lit streets. I live alone and I eatalone and I sleep alone. I sometimes talk to myself or laugh to myself. I never wanted to be alienated. Things like that just happen without thinking. The more I slip intoconfinement, the more time I have to think about these topics that have plagued philosophers forever. My eyes tear to ponder the unknown, well, the unknown to theambiguously blinded majority. I think I might know the answers, though. They have beenright in front of us all this time.With my feet plastered to the floor I began to make my way out of the light. It seemed tofollow me into a dark corner, killing my shadow and in its attempt. The sunlight never appeared to be such a spiteful being until recently. It was a friend you somehow wrongedand now he wants you hurt. How depressing. Times like these make it hard for me not toquestion the relativity between the sun and I. Without it we’d all die, but why does itseem so angry towards me? How have I wronged it? Wait, is it listening-- can it hear me?Ridiculous. I brushed the idea from my mind, but I couldn’t shake the feeling. The idea of life after death is so hard to believe that I simply don’t believe it, but if that isn’t true thenwhat is the purpose of life? I stood for a moment and looked opened my blinds. To myshock I noticed a stream of dried blood fleeing from my left nostril. It flooded with themost beautiful relief imaginable.The sun is a determined being. He stared at me through my open window. I heard himlaugh so once more my blinds were closed. Though my shades, it still desired to enter into my world and brighten it. Though today it was particularly angered, the sun wasmuch like a mother figure and I will hold that against it. I made my way to my doorwayand glanced back at my window. Light, it is, indeed, a very curious force. Without it our species wouldn’t exist, but if it plays such an important role then what role did it play inthe beginning. Did god create light before mankind or did it all come together scientifically like we learned in ninth grade science way back when? If science is correctthere is no need for god. He only adds to the sugarcoating. The clouds passed over thesun, covering it and my room went dark. I savored the moment in silence, still half-asleepand full of the wonder of a new day.
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