Chad and Troy’s 61 Ways to Tick off Your Teacher

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CHAD: Hey guys, Chad and Troy here!
TROY: You probably all have a teacher that you really hate and would like to get
even with right?
CHAD: -cough- Darbus –cough-
TROY: Well then here are 61 ways to annoy the heck out of your teacher
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1. Every time the announcements come on say”Oh No! Not the voices again!”
2. Eliminate verbs from your vocabulary
3. Have giant coughing or sneezing fits
4. Since schools have outlawed gum. Get everyone to chew gum one day. Then at a
certain time, you should ALL blow a bubble and pop it. At the same time.
5. Every time they turn around, play charades with someone on the other side of
the room.
6. Every time they start to talk, yawn really loud
7. Ask stupid questions that have nothing to do with what they’re teaching (e.g.
Why do dogs have wet noses?)
8. Play catch with a friend across the class
9. Say "Guess what?" and when they say "What" say "Chicken butt"
10. If you're late, quote Tolkien: "A wizard is never late. Nor is he early. He
arrives precisely when he means to."
11. Say to the teacher, "Excuse me, but I don't get ANY of this. If you could just
start over from the beginning-say, September?"
12. When they say “who” say “whom” even if it’s wrong.
13. Always raise your hand for every question, then, when called on reply with
something like "Sorry, I lost my train of thought."
14. Run in and yell FIRE!!!!! Or TORNADO!!! Or TSUNAMI!!! Or LANDSLIDE!!!!! Or
EARTHQUAKE!!!!! Or VOLCANO!!!!! Or RHINO!!!!! Or WAR!!!!! Or FLOOD!!!! Or CHEMICAL
SPILL!!!!! Or THE SKY IS FALLING!!!! Or ASTEROID!!!!! Or HURRICANE!!!!! Or IT'S
THE END OF THE WORLD!!!!!
15. Sit in the front desk, where your teacher can see you. Then, just start
scribbling in a notebook. When your teacher asks you, "What are you doing?" Reply
by saying, "I'm drawing. Shouldn't you be teaching instead of looking at what I'm
doing?"
16. Steal all the white-board markers and replace them with ones that won't erase
(CHAD: Again, don’t get caught.)
17. Organize a rousing chorus of "100 bottles of beer on the wall..."
18. If the teacher asks a question, jump up and down yelling "Pick me, pick me!"
and act as if you're going to die if they don't call on you. Once they do, answer
with "Orange"
19. Say, "Wait...could you repeat the last...half-hour? I wasn't paying
attention."
20. Tell a substitute teacher that "Today is my last day!" get away with anything
you like and of course if they start to try and stop you, put on a sad face, if
that doesn’t work then burst into fake tears
21. Turn in homework written in Spanish
22. Say "Seven days..." in a creepy voice.
23. Shout really random things in the middle of class. (E.g. Chow Mein, Cookie,
Bubble, Cow, etc.)
24. If they say "GET OUT OF THE ROOM NOW" just walk dead slowly and act like
you’re not bothered. That will get them annoyed, oh, and if she says "GET OUT OF
THE ROOM NOW" again, say "Ok, ok, god, I’m going"
25. When the teacher asks you a question say "I'm sorry the brain you tried to
reach has been disconnected please leave me alone and try again later, thank you."
26. Point at the wall and start laughing for no reason.
27. If assigned a 2000-word paper, draw two pictures of what the paper was
supposed to be about. After all, a picture is worth 1000 words, right?
28. Loudly tap your pencil to the tune of Jeopardy during a test.
29. Loudly tap your pencil period.
30. If you have a retractable pen, click it really fast.
31. Write the words; “I hate school” in permanent marker on your forehead.
32. Make paper signs and go on strike because you are overworked and “underpaid”.
33. Address your teacher as “boss”
34. When your teacher is yelling at you say “Yes Sergeant (insert teacher’s last
name here)” Or "Sir/Ma'am yes Sir/Ma'am"
35. Keep raising your hand. Every time the teacher recognizes you, go, never mind.
36. When the teacher asks you a question ask her/him to repeat it. Constantly have
them repeat it, and then say, "Still can't hear! I think I'm deaf!
37. Cry in class for no reason. When the teacher asks you what's wrong, go, "I
don't know!"
38. When he/she asks you a question, start babbling about something else, and then
at the end say 'And that's why nuclear physics is worse than Biology'
39. If a teacher calls you to their desk to talk to you about something or sends
you out in the hall and comes to talk to you about your behavior, after they say
one sentence say in an outraged voice "How dare you say that to me (insert
teacher’s name here)!!!! You do know you could lose your job for saying things
like that!!!" then walk back to your desk.
40. When you're sent to a chair away from someone for talking to them, start
talking to the people around where you were moved to, if you’re moved to a desk
where you can't talk to anyone, talk to the wall! And if they send you outside of
the classroom, talk to the wall! It annoys teachers to death.
41. Write her a note that says “u hleepd my speling and grmamer so goode!”
42. When writing an essay, poem or story write about how pointless it is
43. Present them with a "Most Boring Teacher Ever" award
44. On the last day of school hug them & say "Finally!! Now I'll never have to
deal with you again!!"
45. In class, especially if you sit on the front row, make a drawing of the words
School Sucks on your paper
46. When the teacher turns on the overhead projector scream. "AHHH! MY EYES!!"
47. Start a wave
48. Switch seats every 3 minutes
49. Run to the window and say, “Sorry, I thought I saw the bat signal.”
50. Make animal noises and deny doing it.
51. Answer every question with a question, and reply to every statement with,
"Why?"
52. Read everything out loud, in a British accent
53. Use Internet Shorthand and similes in all of your papers
54. Speak and write only in Pig Latin - claim it is your native language
55. Spend the whole lesson trying to lick your elbow
56. Write every essay backwards. Bottom to top, right to left.
57. Whistle random songs as loud as you can. If you can get different sections of
the class to each whistle a different tune, it really annoys them. (TROY: A tip
for this one, if you really want to annoy them, whistle the most annoying song you
can think of. Examples: Mini Wheat’s commercial song, Jeopardy theme, Chicken
Dance, you get the idea.)
58. Hand in a paper where every word is misspelled
59. Make a footprint on the back of one of the pages. When questioned by the
teacher, act like it's nothing unusual. After all, he did tell you to include
footnotes.
60. Make your paper one long, never ending sentence that goes on for pages and
pages and pages; use a lot of semi-colons, commas, and other interesting, rarely-
used punctuation marks but never ever end the sentence.
61. COME TO CLASS! (LOL)
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CHAD: Well there you have it, 61 ways to annoy your teacher!
TROY: Remember one thing, DO NOT ATTEMPT THEM ALL IN ONE CLASS. Your teacher will
catch on and it takes the fun out of it. DENY EVERYTHING REGRET NOTHING!