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The longing for Edward Cullen

The longing for Edward Cullen

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Published by Sofie
Bella and Edward are passionately in love. But Bella wants’ more. What will happen when Edward finally agrees to sleep with her, and he actually ends up injuring her badly when he does so? Can Edward ever forgive himself for his mistake? [B/ED love story - following the Twilight-figures!]

This is the first part of my first fan-fiction! Please COMMENT if you think i should continue. :D

Btw the story takes place after Eclipse, so all the things in Twiligt, New Moon and Eclipse has already taken place - Expect for Edward proposal and Bella's "sleep-with-me" request!

I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT - ALL THE FIGURES ARE STEPHENIE MEYERS. Im just using my imagination :-)
Bella and Edward are passionately in love. But Bella wants’ more. What will happen when Edward finally agrees to sleep with her, and he actually ends up injuring her badly when he does so? Can Edward ever forgive himself for his mistake? [B/ED love story - following the Twilight-figures!]

This is the first part of my first fan-fiction! Please COMMENT if you think i should continue. :D

Btw the story takes place after Eclipse, so all the things in Twiligt, New Moon and Eclipse has already taken place - Expect for Edward proposal and Bella's "sleep-with-me" request!

I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT - ALL THE FIGURES ARE STEPHENIE MEYERS. Im just using my imagination :-)

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Published by: Sofie on Dec 05, 2009
Copyright:Attribution Non-commercial

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11/25/2013

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1.The longing
“Never knew I could feel like thisLike I've never seen the sky beforeWant to vanish inside your kissEvery day I love you more and more” 
It’s not just lust. No. It’s longing. Even though I never tried it before, I have neverwanted anything more in my life than this. And lying here beside him, the longing inme exploded. He was just so beautiful. I could look at him for days and still neverunderstand how anyone in this world could be so perfect.His gorgeous, perfect, pale skin made his deep bronze topaz eyes so easy to get lostin. I often caught myself stopped breathing when I looked into his eyes. And I justcan’t help myself from stirring at him!I always feel an extreme need to touch him, to reassure myself that he really is real.And when I touch him, sometimes that not even enough. It’s really hard to understandwhy this top model has chosen to lay her beside me… Everything about him is just sobreathtaking. It’s almost unbearable.Even though he is hard as a rock, it just feels like I’m melting into his skin when Itouch him. And his cold skin always makes me shiver. But it’s not the cold that makesme shiver. It’s just that feeling of touching Edward, being physically close to Edward…It’s like fire inside me!But it doesn’t burn in a bad way; my body feels all warm in a very comfortable way.But when you look behind the comfortable feeling, the longing for him to be closer isalways there. I don’t think I’ll ever get used to the feeling I get when I touch him.Never. Hmm, if I should explain my life in the last two years with a few sentences it wouldprobably sound something like this:
“Hi I’m Bella Swan, just an ordinary girl expect for my two left-foods and generalclumsiness. Oh, yea then two years ago I ran into this guy, who by the way is beyondstunning, and I totally fell in love with him. And by some miracle I still don’t understand, he fell in love with me as well. The last two years with Edward Cullen hasbeen the best in my 18 year old human life. There is one thing about Edward… He is avampire. Oh, so now you probably think “Now that must mean trouble”, and yes
1
 
 you’re right! During the last two years I been in several near-death experiences, whichincluding being chased by a masochistic vampire who really just wanted to track medown, a revenge-filled woman vampire who later on the created a whole vampirearmy to chase and hunt me down. And if that isn’t enough I have the strongest andmost powerful vampire family, the Volturi, waiting for a reason to kill me… So yea. Iguessed I should be scared to death by now.” 
 Well, I’m actually not. It’s just impossible to be scared to death when you’re lying nextto Edward. Well, I guess lying next to Edward makes it impossible to think aboutanything else than his perfectness and the constant desire I feel towards him. So, yea,the feelings that are humming inside me at the moment just doesn’t allow any spacefor fear.
“Bella, beautiful sweet Bella… As much as I love staring into your deep brown eyes,it’s killing me not to know what you’re thinking. And you have been so quiet all night;it’s so frustrating so please let me into your mind sweetheart…” 
Edward said, and off course he could easily see that I had something on my mind that I didn’t tell him.Luckily he cannot read my mind, like he can with everyone else and thank god forthat! The thought of Edward reading my mind at this moment made me blush and lookdown.I couldn’t tell him what I was thinking! I guess I didn’t want to sound… Desperate? Andwho was I kidding.I was desperate! More desperate than I had ever been before. And for that I wasembarrassed. Embarrassed that I was longing so hopelessly for Edward’s touch.I was hungering for his sweet breath close to mine, to feel his smooth, cold fingersagainst my skin, for his lips to come closer. But Edward wasn’t that kind of guy. Anyother guy wouldn’t waste any minute with a lustful girl beside them, who just wantedto get wild, be physical and lose control with her boyfriend!For that was indeed the biggest desire and longing in my life at the moment. ButEdward made very strict rules about the topic. And he wasn’t going to give in.He wouldn’t lose control with me because he was afraid that he might hurt me. Sosilly! How mange nights I have been dreaming about it. About him. Dreaming aboutlaying only in underwear with Edward lying beside me, caressing my body, kissing me2
 
from the neck to the collarbone and further down... The thought just made me blusheven more.
“Bella!” 
Edward cried
“Tell me what’s on your mind; I don’t want you to feeluncomfortable”.
 Psst, how could he even think it?Like it was possible for me to feel uncomfortable with him lying here next to me. Andthen, I felt his cold hand as he lifted my chin. I shivered.
“Please, love?” 
he whispered with the most melting expression in his eyes, while hebreathed his sweet breath in my face and dazzled me completely. Like I was able totell him anything when he did that to me! I had to blink a couple of times to bringmyself back to present.
“Edward...” 
I stopped. How could I ever tell him this! I knew he would immediately sayno, and I would feel rejected and hurt.But the thing about Edward is that he always wanted to give me things and presents. Iknow that whatever material thing I would wish for, he would give it to me the exactmoment I asked for it. The only problem is that I’m really not the material kind of girl.However, now there is one thing I want. No, not just something I want, it’s one thing I
need
. Edward.I need to be physical with Edward. The only thing he will never give me is the onething I crave for.
“Edward, I… I….”  
Oh, god I can’t tell him this! Ugh, I just have to give it a try.
 “I have been thinking about something and
…” I blushed again.
“Love, don’t be afraid or embarrassed, you can tell me anything. You don’t have tokeep secrets from me
” he said and leaned forward and kissed my nose.And only that little physical contact had made my heart sound like I’d been running 10kilometers non-stop. Off course Edward heard my heart changed. And I know that heloved how such small things as a kiss on the nose, could light a fire inside my body,which because of my easily blushing and uncontrollable heartbeat was impossible forme to hide.3

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i love it you must finish this story you can't just leave us at the edge of hour sit like that you have to finish your work is so good

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