In contrast, it is useful to analyze the situation of people who are stuck, bothmonetarily and in spirit, if only to allow you to avoid these errors. This is based onmy experience of two decades of dealing with both winnèrs and temporary losers inthe game of life.
1. They are frightened.
Their lives are dominated by fear. They see the world as ascary, threatening place and crave security, dullness, mediocrity. They long for everyday to be the same as the last and become scared and upset if even a small changebreaks the monotony of their days.
2. They completely lack visualization ability.
If asked to visualize their futureself, they would stare at you blankly. They are not pretending. They do not evenunderstand what you mean by this exercise. If you force them to try, they’ll comeback with nothing more than a shrug.
3. Assuming that you could drag some sort of dream out of them
(for examplewanting to be worth a million dollars some day) then they would be wholly incapableof working backwards from that point to the present, and suggesting actions theymight have to take in order to make this come about. Again, they are not faking.There is now; there is the future; and in between, a yawning, fathomless chasm - ablank.
4. Even if you were to write the steps out, 1-100,
with a check box next to eachone, they absolutely lack the discipline even to start on the task, let alone completethe steps. At the first slight downfall, or negative comment from a friènd, they willgive up. In any situation which requires a choice between working for a better future,and instant gratification now, they will unfailingly choose instant gratification.But this is not you, hopefully. If you recognize yourself here, then don't worrybecause it is possible to change and get out of this 'stuck' pattern you are in.You need to develop the habits of a winnèr. You want to enjoy today, but have aneven better tomorrow waiting for you.To do this you must model yourself on winnèrs - people who have achieved greatthings in their lives. I am talking here about 'winnèrs' and 'losers' but I do not meanthe term 'loser' in the usual derogatory sense.By a 'loser' I mean someone who, by their own definition of winn*ng and losing, isfalling well short of where they want to be. By a 'winnèr' I mean someone who, bytheir own definition of winn*ng and losing, is pulling ahead of the game andachieving that which they set out to achieve.
This is how a winner operates:
1. They are brave.
Like all human beings they feel fear, but have mastered it andare able to rise above it. Whilst they acknowledge that there are frightening peopleand places in the world, in general they view the world as a benevolent place, full of great opportunities and wonderful people. This is a vital principle. Winnèrs view theworld as mainly benevolent with some bad bits. Losers see the world as mainlymalevolent with some good bits.